The Short Poetry Collection

Surrender

People often feel dissatisfied. Everything always seems to be a problem, especially in a relationship. Unsatisfied attitudes complicated by the mysterious workings of the heart make things feel wrong, even when everything is going well.

Alina is aware of the change in her relationship with Danu, a man who is considerate, sensitive, and always appreciates Alina's opinion. Everything feels complete. Danu was like a perfect person whom God sent to Alina. Many of his friends often say how lucky Alina is to get a man like Danu. It would be foolish to have Alina leave Danu for another man. Alas, Alina might be really stupid.

During the year of the relationship, the quarrel between them can be counted by the fingers. It was just a small quarrel and never lasted long because Danu always chose to give up. Their families are also very close, parents' blessing is certainly not a problem in this relationship. The problem may be only one, namely Alina herself who is dissatisfied with her own relationship.

Danu is not Alina's first boyfriend. However, just this time Alina was bored with her relationship. Lately his mind has always wondered what the reason is. He was sure that there was nothing wrong in his relationship with Danu. He feels comfortable with Danu, but somehow comfortable it feels different. Feels hollow. Blank.

Alina feels the drama every time with Danu that makes her feel more guilty. The usual smile he showed was just a pretense in order not to hurt the lover. Alina could only hope that her lover was unaware of the difference she felt.

Amidst Alina's turmoil and concern for Danu, Alina's last ex suddenly reappears in her life. I don't know where the guy got his number after a long lost contact.

Hi

It's Dirga

How are you, Al?

Alina's forehead wrinkled when she first read the message. Baffled. Why did his ex suddenly contact him again after such a long time?

^^^I am good^^

^^^Why?^^^

Reluctant

Do you have time tomorrow?

May meet?

Because of the curiosity that surrounded his mind, he agreed. There's nothing wrong with making friends with your ex, right? Just friends shouldn't matter, Alina thought.

The next day, they meet at lunchtime at a restaurant near Alina's office. Their meeting started with a feeling of awkwardness. There was no conversation between them until the food arrived at the table.

"Where, Al? I'm afraid you've got another girlfriend" asked Dirga after the waiter who took their food away.

Alina who was about to touch her food. He looked at the man before him before finally making a sound. "Yes. She's kind. Always give up and understand me" he said slowly.

"You're happy with him, Al?" dirga asked again as if he did not believe the words of the woman in front of him.

Alina was silent again, not answering straight away. A feeling of doubt filled his heart made him ask himself again. Is he happy with Danu? Shouldn't he be happy getting a girlfriend as good as Danu? However, why does it feel so hard to answer yes or just nod? Even so, Alina finally nodded her head in response. His hands began to scoop the curry rice he ordered, hoping that the man before him would stop asking about his relationship now.

After that, only the sound of spoons and forks could be heard between them. Dirga also began to eat his dishes while occasionally glancing at Alina who continued to stare at his food, like deliberately avoiding his gaze. Samar looks, Dirga grinned. I don't know what's on his mind right now.

The meeting of Alina and Dirga did not stop there. The next few days they met often. No less rarely also interact through chat or phone. Rather than Danu, Alina was seen with Dirga more often.

"Hello, Danu? Why?" ask Alina over the phone. Now he is having lunch with Dirga—lagi.

"Where are you?" ask Danu. There was something strange about his tone, colder than usual.

"Again outside, lunch. Why?" alina replied with a bit of confusion. Danu's tone sounded unfriendly, but Alina chose not to care too much.

"Who's the guy?"

"Just like temen." Alina's forehead is shrinking.

"Turkey? Both of you?"

Alina's stunned. It's not usually Danu to ask such things. During this time, Danu always trusted Alina and felt no need to limit her association. But why is this time different? His feelings became uncomfortable. Could Danu be aware of what is going on in their relationship?

"Rame-rame really, same office management. Wh why? Tumben is that." Alina decided to lie. He couldn't tell the truth.

"Father. Yeah, I'm closed, huh? Hye!" danu said, then immediately ended the call without waiting for Alina to make a sound. Guilt soon enveloped Alina. For some reason, he felt like he was caught off guard. However, Dirga's words managed to distract him and dispel all bad thoughts, at least temporarily.

Alina did not know that her lover was in the same restaurant as her, even sitting not too far away from her. Danu watched everything, from the beginning they entered the restaurant to getting out again.

At first, Danu only assumed that the man was Alina's client. However, looking at the movements and some of the conversations he managed to capture, the two of them looked very close. Not to mention Alina's attitude that changed a little when she was with him caused suspicion. Danu decides to call Alina from the bathroom and how devastated she is when she hears Alina lying. Could his suspicions be true? Danu wasn't sure that she wanted to know the answer.

Lying finds the truth

Suspicious of a real event

If only I could, then,

he closed his eyes and pretended

Pretending to know nothing

Pretending to see nothing

As he has always done

His love is like clapping one hand

Try every way

to be a dream

But apparently, never satisfied either

^^^^ Fine^^

^^^Is that the problem?^^^

^^^ Or did it never exist?^^^

^^^ All are pretending

^^^Terbalut sense of suggestion liver^^^

^^^ It is true that he loves her

^^^Then for what?^^^

^^^A year seems wasted^^^

^^^What is the relation?^^^

Maybe it never was

Maybe they're all just pretending

All this time, it was just him

Struggling alone, knowing nothing

^^^Maybe it was just the affection he was looking for^^^

^^^And there he waited^^

^^^ There is no love

^^^Just a sense of longing to find a lover of the heart^^^^

^^^This is his fault^^^

^^^ Which he thought was not the truth^^

...A year...

...It took a year...

...Until they both realized...

...Too slow...

...To save the heart...

...From baseless relationships...

After that day, their relationship became even more strained. Danu who usually often contacts Alina deliberately does not do it. Meanwhile, Alina just waited without any intention of contacting first. For a year, it was always Dan who was more active. Alina was more often silent and waiting. Even in this condition, Alina was still silent and waiting as if she never cared. Danu begins to question Alina's feelings and commitment in silence. Does Alina really love him? Has he struggled alone all this time to maintain this relationship? The question resurfaced in his mind after he had desperately convinced himself.

A week has passed. During that time also Danu did not get a message or call from Alina makes Danu feel fed up. He can't take it anymore. There were no more answers that he had to wait for because everything was already very clear. Parting is the best way for both of them.

"Hello, where are you?" ask Danu over the phone. He was already in his car, ready to leave for where Alina is now, wherever it is.

"Again in the garden of the house decket. Why, Dan?" ask Alina. He had no idea what would happen next.

"I'm going there. Don't go anywhere!" asserted Danu, then ended the call of the other side. He immediately started his car and drove away as fast as he could.

Alina was confused, but she kept saying Danu. He was just about to go home after a workout around the park. But now it's not so. He finally chose to sit on an empty bench, alone. While playing his phone, he waited. Alina was not at all curious about what Danu was going to say. Perhaps, Alina was also just as fed up with Danu.

Alina raised her face from the screen of the phone after realizing that someone was standing before her. That man is Danu. His breathing was slightly breathless which made Alina conclude that this man ran out. Alina stood up, and now they stood face to face. Alina who was waiting for Danu to speak and Danu who was still neutralizing her breath while gathering courage in her heart.

"Al, we broke up" Danu said at last. The man did not dare to look directly into Alina's eyes so his gaze fell on his own shoes.

Silent. Alina who was silent made Danu forced to raise her head just to look at the girl's expression. There's no sadness there, just a flat face. However, Danu was able to catch a slight feeling of pleasure and relief in the girl's eyes which made her heart even more painful.

Still not getting an answer, Danu finally decides to leave. He knew there was no point in waiting for the woman to speak, though in his heart he hoped she would stop him. However, until he walked even further, there were no signs that referred to his expectations.

Danu gave up, and so did Alina. The harmonious relationship was foundered as well. However, only one person was hurt in this story. Others just try to feel sad because according to him, that's what should happen in him.