The Pain of being Betrayed

Forgive

It is approaching new can my eyes closed, because it hurts my heart betrayed and disappointed by Mas Angga.

The next morning, when waking up as usual Mas Angga always check his hp.

At that time I was already doing my activities as a wife, who was never absent every day.

Suddenly Mas Angga nyamperin I to the well that is again holy.

"Dear this is what you mean"

I just kept quiet, not wanting to discuss the matter anymore, which already made my heart ache and disappointed.

"Jawab it if I am again nanya" said Mas Angga again slightly raised his voice.

"Do you not have eyes and can not read now Mas"

"So I still ask you what I mean to send WA to you" replied I don't want to lose

"Eat him in the first question, only angry ngak clear so."

"Huh, what would you ask me!! do you deserve to chat with other women like that!! what a merit!"

"According to I deserve, because there is nothing excessive also from the chat-an Me, you are the only one who takes too heart."

"Ah already, it is I who is always wrong in your eyes Mas, you are always right! "

"Then proceed, if it is appropriate for you to do so. Do not discuss it again then." answered me with stifled emotions and tears that have begun to reminisce in the eyes.

"You don't do that, please tell me which one is serious and which one is joking. Don't be a little sulking, get angry that's not clear."

Oh my gosh, God! what did he say just now? Don't be so angry and just kidding?!

I don't know, I think it's just a joke or what, what's important now is that my heart is sick and disappointed.

"Here you are, indeed you are right, do not need to be discussed again, I want to be holy." answered Me while returning to busy yourself with a dirty cloth that has been a mountain.

Without saying much more, Mas Angga returned to the room.

As usual, I have all her needs. Because it's my responsibility as his wife.

But now I'm more silent, talking if asked that's just as necessary.

***********

...I am just a human being, God...

...Who has a fragile heart...

...Right now my heart is really fragile, fragile because it was betrayed by the person I love and love more than anything, but now what!! ...

...Only this wound is in my heart...

...I don't care, even though he said just a joke. ...

...What is clear is that right now, my heart is already sick and DISAPPOINTED!! ...

I pour it all in writing, for this is all I can do to reduce the burden on My heart.

Every day I lock my mouth not to ask and talk to Mas Angga.

"Honey, come on, let's hope. I'm sorry if what I did was wrong, and it hurt you."

"I promise I won't repeat."

"Yes I'll prove it to you, if I don't repeat the same mistake again."

"Well, for this time I'm sorry, but please prove your words Mas, I don't want you to just make a promise with Me, because my heart is not as strong as you think."

"Yes dear," replied Mas Angga while embracing Me and bringing Me into his arms

This is My weakness, if Mas Angga has said softly like this will make Me easily melt, and in addition this has entered the fourth day we are silent to each other, not greeting each other, I am only afraid God is angry, because it is not good husband and wife silence each other through three days, that I remember until now.

The days we live as usual again, I no longer care about Mas Angga's business with his cellphone, because I see the behavior of Mas Angga is still reasonable. So I try to always trust him.

"Mas, soon Alif will be going to school, where will he be enrolled?" ask me as we again sit in the exit room with Mas Angga playing the game as usual.

"Near me work there is Kindergarten, so later register it there, so let's go and go home easily."

"Okay, but it's good there?" ask me, because to be honest as a mother I want Alif to get a good education.

"Well, dear, there are more lessons about Islam that dear, especially in memorizing the Qur'an."

"Emm, it's good that baby, I also want our children to be hafiz and hafizah."

"But I hear now that kids who go to school are being told to go online with the government, because the corona is becoming more and more."

"Just wish I could."

"Hopefully Mas, the matter is also free school if the ends are only online, while the tuition we still pay."

"Yeah tomorrow I'll go back to work and ask you there."

"Okay Mas, yes I slept first well, Mas do not mess around, beware if caught again."

"Yes my dear." replied Mas Angga while twisting one of his eyes flirtatious.

I passed into the room, honestly all day doing endless homework, making my body crumble.

*******

"Mas, it's two o'clock in the morning? what's sleepy?" I said when I woke up to the bathroom.

"So, baby, it's over again."

"Yes, I just don't want you to get sick later because you stay up all day."

"Yes, just a little bit more."

I no longer argue, go straight to the bathroom to pee. After the bathroom, I continued my sleep.

Before long, Mas Angga followed to the room and splashed his body beside Ku, and did not forget to hug Ku worthy of his bolsters. Eleven twelve is the same with Alif when he sleeps.

The next morning, as usual I woke up early to prepare all his needs for work, starting from his clothes and coffee, and not to forget also a few houses.

"Wake up, it's morning."

"Hmm, just a moment, baby, five more minutes."

"Good God!! just keep it like this when you wake up."

"It's almost half seven tablets of Mas, later it's late again" said Ku again while pulling Mas Angga blanket.

Mas Angga stretched his muscles, and rose up to the bathroom.