The Pain of being Betrayed

God level emotions

My days are so hard, because all this housework is just me doing it myself.

Dear not, seven days after giving birth but all the housework I do all, there is no help in the least from Mas Angga.

I really don't mind, because I'm not a person who likes to depend on others.

But this is another thing, isn't it my husband, the head of the household. She should have helped with this homework without having to ask for it first, especially now that my position is out of labor.

My parents when calling, must always remember not to move a lot, not to do heavy work first afraid of bleeding later.

flashbacks

"Ara, you're out of bed, so don't move much first, don't do heavy work later can bleed" said my mother when again calling

"Yes, Mah. All the work Mas Angga did." lied to me to maintain the image of my husband.

"It's good then, wait until your child is forty days old, after the new puerperium can move."

"Yes, I don't have to worry about everything you say I do."

"Well, take care of your health. Assalamu'alaikum."

"Getishalam."

TUT TUT

The phone connection was also cut off.

Flashback is over

That is how I am to keep the good name of my husband in the eyes of my family, willing to lie.

But the one whom I always flattered before my parents, never once understood what I wanted.

These past few months I've been very grateful for her changes that led to positive things, but now what!! it's becoming more like before.

I can only resign, can only hold the resentment in the heart without being able to pour it on others, want to be bulked up to whom?? really want to have friends to share stories so as not to be a burden. But who??

My mother-in-law?? ah, it's impossible!! because I have been hanging out for so many years, I have understood the character and nature of the Mas Angga family.

He will not give a solution to my problems, instead will add to my heartache, because in his eyes his child will not be wrong, he said, because it is proven from several times I complained about Mas Angga, but his response was only a defense for his son.

Ah already, many times I tried to make peace with the circumstances that I face and live in today.

Trying to accept everything, trying not to think negatively.

*******

Days change weeks, weeks change months and months change years.

It does not feel that Ayis is now one and a half years old, can already walk.

However, the changes that I want to make to Mas Angga do not have any sign.he is still busy with the game 'ML'. And what makes me even more upset is his new hobby that I think is very risky.

Go fishing!!

Well, his interlude hobby is fishing, I wonder if there are hobbies that I think will be detrimental.

how not, fishing does not know the time and place, in office hours are still busy with fishing business, I have commemorated.

"Mas, can ngak anyway looking for a hobby that will not harm you, online games also harm you in addition to fishing, let alone you fishing often in office hours, too, your boss will get angry and fire you how? finding a job is hard now, especially if you only have a Smp diploma."

"You take it easy, baby, it won't be a problem, don't you think about it."

"As much as you are, it's important that I remember you."

Again, there is no answer because the focus has been to the HP screen in his handheld.

Want to grab the HP and slam it to the floor, so he can not play the game anymore.

Because there was no response from her I went to the room and joined in breaking down my body beside Alif and Ayis who were taking a nap.

*******

A few weeks later, all employees where Mas Angga worked in the gathering were held impromptu meetings.

And it's a meeting about work, which I've been afraid of all this time, a reprimand about fishing during working hours.

"How was the meeting?" ask Mas Angga who just came home from the office.

"Regarding us who like fishing in working hours, and was already in the letter SP 1."

"Well, so if I say it was heard, it was also. fortunately still in love SP 1, if it is still fired how."

"It's not possible, it's not his authority to fire employees."

"Ah, I'm tired of talking to you, Mas."

"Later tonight I'm gonna go fishing with my friend."

"What time?"

"Let's go at eight in the night."

"Oh, whatever." I replied briefly because it was already upset, very and very upset.

I immediately died Mas Angga who was busy with his HP.

Remain in the heart of my prayer as before, because in addition to his friends now his HP is also the target of my jealousy.

How not!! morning until morning again only HP is in priority right, eat still hp not stay, want to 'WC' hp still in carry.

There is no more time for me and the kids.

Even if it was just to share a story, or my son who wanted to invite him to play, still never took the time for us.

Sometimes I want to give up on all this, but I try again to make peace with My heart.

******

"Darling, I'm leaving first yeah."

"Hm." answered Me briefly a sign I don't like, but his insensitive base.

"Don't forget the door's in the lock, maybe I'll be home a little late."

"Oh, all of you bring blankets and pillows, don't go home, just sleep there. I don't mind."

"Why are you, baby?"

"Still you, why me?"

"Ah, indeed you can not understand what I want and I feel."

"Sometimes I wonder you baby, I hang out with friends I can't, I want to play futsal I can't, I'm not allowed to go fishing right now."

Whoa..!! whoa..!!

Looking for a match, it seems he.

"Eh Mas, I never did not forbid you to gather with your friends, as long as your friends are good for you, it has a good influence, not that plunges you into a path that will make you lose even Me and also our children, even once I asked your friends to gather in our homes only, let me get tired of having coffee or snacks for his ngak what, as long as it looks the same eyes my head, not the one that takes you hanging out and bring 'Tuak' to the party and his home stoned. That's not what I want."

"And the problem of fishing, yes I forbid because you are fishing out of place, finally What haa, incident also you in love SP1 from the office. Actually, I'm not forbidding you please go fishing, but not at work, not at night."

"And the problem of playing futsal, I also never deny, there is even a chat in your WA group to take part in futsal, you yourself who do not want to go even though I have told you to, because it's not good with your office friends. But did you answer when it was a males because you want to play your online game, right?"

"If indeed all this time what I forbid is a burden for you, do not have to do. please do as you wish. What do you want please. I'm tired!" said Ku with emotions that were not contained anymore, I went into the room died his who was still staring at the door.