THE LOVE OF LOVE, AZZAHRA

HEART CONFIDENCE

The sun began to crawl up, the cold that had enveloped it now began to warm up. This warmth is also felt by people who are now gathering while laughing. Sometimes there was laughter among them.

"Should you go home today? tomorrow is still Sunday. Why not tomorrow. Yes, yes. tomorrow morning yes let later tonight we barbeque-an first," whine Lintang on his friends.

"If we go home tomorrow continue when dong we rest, the day after tomorrow we have returned to the activities of each loh, Lin," said Sisil.

"Yes will return by plane, one to two hours have also reached home. Still can rest," replied Latitude.

"You don't feel sorry for this one, huh? Rania needs more rest. Poor him, the day after he returned to teaching again," said Kemal while embracing his wife who is now pregnant with her second child.

The sound of breath accompanied decakkan from the lips Latitude.

"When we play again here if Rendra is a bit big so we can picnic to a good place in Bandung, Lin," said Rania comforted his best friend.

"Yes, Rania gave birth first. Let us have no burden to go" Galang said.

"Well, long dong."

Lintang pursed his lips.

"What would you like to wait for Zahra and Farid to get married, let the Boss and the lecturer who bear it all," said Kemal who was immediately rewarded with a shocked look Zahra.

"Kok being me?" zahra.

"Let's go, Ai. So in pairs, "it was Andrie's turn to answer.

Zahra just grunted softly hearing him while Farid smiled bitterly, he recalled the conversation Zahra and Andrie had last night.

"Oh yeah, Raffa came home with Mommy and Ummah right?" sisil asked Raffa who was now in Gilang's lap.

"Raffa is with me, in two days I go back to Semarang" Farid replied.

"Well, is it okay to go back to Semarang? don't you wait for the injury to heal?" sahut Rania's.

"My injury has improved considerably, later in Semarang can continue to control until it recovers. It's okay, Ra?" terang Farid then turned to look at Zahra.

Zahra smiled as she nodded.

"As long as you don't do any excess activity on the part of your injury, In Shay'ah Allah it is not until two months that the bones return to their original position" Zahra explained.

"Well, Khalis wants to go home with Kak Affa?" chirps Khalisa with a typical voice of a three-year-old child.

Everyone turned to look at the adorable boy.

"Khalis came home with Ummah and Abah. Pity Oom Farid if you continue to fuss later," Rania told her daughter.

Hearing Rania's words, Khalisa actually cried while pulling Raffa's arm until his body was interested. Raffa came down from Gilang's lap and gently rubbed Khalisa's head.

"Khalis should not cry if you want to be with Kak Affa back home," Raffa calmed down to the little boy while rubbing his wet cheeks. Khalisa blinked his eyes and put on a sweet smile while nodding at Raffa.

"It seems that there is no need to wait a long time, Ra, the two boys are married," said Kemal who immediately got a hard pinch on his arm.

"Sick, Yang," Kemal rubbed his pinched arm.

"Some of you are, Mas, if you don't think about it first. Three-year-old new kid is already thinking of getting her married."

"Let's not zina later, dear. You saw the two boys play touch."

"Still kids, Mas. Don't mess with his mind."

Rania and Kemal were still arguing funny while the others were just laughing looking at the two. Zahra shook her head looking at all of them then approached Raffa and Khalisa. He lifted Khalisa's body and carried it and grabbed his son's hand.

"Where are you going, Ra?" ask Kemal and Rania together.

Zahra stopped stepping and turned her head.

"For a long time here, children's minds can be poisoned by you" said Zahra then stepped back.

Laughter broke out for a moment after Zahra said that. Gilang patted hard Kemal's shoulder while chuckling.

"Drug the gih, remove the poison that is in your head, so as not to be contagious to children," said Gilang who was in response to laughter by others.

* * * * *

Sunday should be a day of relaxation for workers, because on that day they can enjoy their off days before returning to grapple with work, tomorrow. But that doesn't apply to resident doctors like Zahra. A lot of the time that should be his day off should end at his workplace.

For doctors, intership doctors and resident doctors like him, the hospital is like home to them. Almost all the time they have, they spend working to deepen and improve their skills. Zahra himself was so, his time was up in the hospital precisely in the operating room. In addition to honing his skills in the field of surgery, of course, he also has to collect operating hours so that his abilities are recognized.

Just a campus, another place that Zahra stopped by. Even the apartment was only a short stopover for him because he spent more time sleeping in the hospital.

Zahra was putting food on the dining table. There were already some foods he cooked himself for Farid, Raffa and Khalisa. Yes, Rania and Kemal finally gave permission to his daughter who wanted to go home with Raffa. Zahra took the rice for the three people who were now sitting quietly in their seats. She was like a wife and mother to her little family by serving them at the dinner table.

"I'm waiting for days like this, we can experience in the future" said Farid, making Zahra look up to look at the man.

"Here is Allah" Zahra answered briefly, carving out her small smile.

Farid smiled too. Although in his heart, he knew that Zahra still could not accept it wholeheartedly. But Farid did not want to give up and give up, he would continue to ask the Owner of Love to be able to turn Zahra's heart for him, making her the last port of his life journey.

"There are some snacks for Raffa and Khalisa that I put in the kitchen cupboard and the freezer. You can give it to them after they wake up" Zahra told Farid, who is sitting on his laptop. Farid nodded in response to Zahra's words.

"Rest, don't push yourself too hard to work at the moment. Your body still needs to rest after receiving the shock and impact a month ago" Zahra advised Farid, who is focusing on his laptop.

Farid turned his attention to Zahra then smiled sweetly.

"I'm better, Ra. You don't have to worry."

Zahra breathed a sigh. Farid was indeed the type of man who could not ignore his responsibilities.

"Well, if I say yes,"

"What time's it?" ask Farid quickly.

"Not more than three hours. Today I only did surgery once after I stopped by the Campus library briefly to return the book, only then did I go home" replied Zahra who was immediately nod by Farid.

"Call me if you need anything. I'm leaving now yes, assalamu'alaikum."

"Wa'alaikumus greetings. Be careful on the road, Ra."

☘️☘️☘️

Zahra swung her legs a little faster, down the faculty hallway towards the parking lot. When he came out of the library earlier, he could see dark clouds appear to adorn the sky as if it would soon rain. And sure enough, it hasn't reached him in the parking lot. The heavy rain coming down to earth made Zahra choose to take shelter.

Zahra leaned against the wall in the last hallway before setting foot in the field near the parking lot. The rain was so heavy that Zahra slightly grabbed her body. Suddenly the wind blew, moving the rain towards him. Suddenly, Zahra raised a hand covering her face.

Just as the rainwater was pointing at Zahra, someone swiftly stood in front of her. Slowly Zahra lowered her hand which she used to flush the rain down her face, as she felt that no rain was washing her. Zahra raised her head.

Deggs..

A wide back was right in front of him as if blocking the rain water that leads to Zahra's body. Looking at who the owner of the back was, Zahra slowly pulled her lips up with teary eyes and soon the water droplets that had previously adorned the eyes went down to wet her cheeks. Zahra held her breath so that her suction would not escape her lips. There was a longing that had previously erupted now as if it had come out when he saw his figure.

Silence was created for some time, there was only the sound of rain falling on the earth. Both of them were busy with their own thoughts.

"I have not seen you for a long time" said Zahra, among the sounds of rain after a long silence.

"There is something I have to deal with in Germany" Habibi replied with his eyes closed avoiding the rain that was about to break through his eyes. His face and front of his body were already wet with rain.

Zahra was silent again. There was no reason for him to ask again about Habibi's affairs because it was not his right.

"Are you okay as long as I'm not around?" habibi asked again breaking the silence between them.

"I'm never okay after his departure" I'm Zahra with her head down and her tears back down.

"Did he betray your love, by leaving you?"

Zahra shook her head as if Habibi had seen her.

"No. He never betrayed my love."

"Then?"

Habibi's eyes were slightly rounded, his body stiffened upon hearing the man loved by his beloved woman had died. Then what does he expect from his struggle to figure it all out if the man is gone. It is impossible for that man to be himself because he is still alive. Then what about the piece of the puzzle that rotated in his head, which was as if it was a flash of memory belonging to someone he himself did not know.

Habibi sighed deeply, trying to unravel the tightness that was pressing him more and more until he felt difficult and sick at the same time.

"Seven years ago, he told me he was coming back. He asked me to take care of my heart and love for him, but "godly Zahra seemed hard to say it all.

"Zahra," call Habibi to cut him off.

"Would it be wrong if I waited for him? Is it wrong if I still expect it?" said Zahra began to be unable to control his emotions with tears ignoring Habibi's call.

Habibi rubbed his face and twisted his body so that he could see the beautiful face in a very close distance. Habibi's eyes immediately cheered him, in addition to the longing that dominated him also because he saw how devastated the woman in front of him was.

"You're sure he's dead?" habibi asked, immediately making Zahra look up at him with a face of flood of tears.

Habibi tightly clenched his hands beside his body. He held back as hard as he could, suppressing the pain that began to slash his heart when the tears were shed endlessly.

Zahra shook her head slowly with the unbroken netra of Habibi's black iris. Sin, yes both know the sin they are doing at this time but the desire for longing that they can not accommodate, and again the wounds that seemed to expect to be washed made them forget what they were doing.

"I don't want to believe it all but time seems to answer and erode my confidence."

"What if time just wanted to test your heart and loyalty to him?"

"Seven years is not a short time to test my loyalty to him. Should he do this to me?"

"Then what about the man who now holds the status of your fiancee? didn't it already answer that your loyalty to her had faltered."

Zahra gasped at Habibi's words, closing her eyes to ward off the pain.

"The circumstances that did not allow me to choose according to my wishes" Zahra said with her eyes still closed.

"Is there already a seed of love for her present in your heart?"

Zahra opened her eyes and looked back at Habibi with round eyes that began to widen.

"If that love is already present in my heart should I cry over my decision every time because the hope of someone I want still continues to dominate."

A moment of silence was felt after Zahra said that. There was only the interaction of the gazes of the two who were now penetrating each other's defenses.

"Zahra, man,"

"Auntie,"

Say both at once and then go back to silence.

"I miss you."

"Zahra misses you, Habibi."

Again, they say the words at the same time. The tears escaped again. Now not only belongs to Zahra but also Habibi. The man shed his tears.

"If I was the man who left you seven years ago, would you believe me?"

Zahra was silent for a moment then before long she shook her head softly even though her heart answered another. If Zahra is right, Zahra wants to know how far Habibi will fight for him. He also wanted to ascertain the truth of Habibi's feelings for him.

"Why?" ask Habibi slowly.

His voice was barely audible due to the heavy rain.

"Because he'll never forget me. He could never ignore the angel of his heart. Because I am his breath, because I am the heart of his life" Zahra said, staring into Habibi's netra.

"What if that's not my wish? What if it's the circumstances that make me forget you and our memories?"

"At least your heart does not forget, if it has an owner. Eyes may forget who he saw, but the heart will never forget who he loved," said Zahra again reminded Kayla of the sentence once spoken to the man.

"What if my heart remembers all that?"

Zahra stared silently and felt what appeared to be the black iris.

"My heart loves you, Zahra."

Zahra saw it all, not a single lie emanated from Habibi's eyes. Those eyes really look like Hafiz's, Habibinya's. Now his heart was squeezed, it was painful to imagine between Habibi and Farid. Who will be hurt by his choice. For Zahra herself, don't ask her how her heart is right now. The pain in his heart was getting worse. His life seemed to be played with a destiny that had to plunge his heart many times.

"Say one thing that can make me believe and believe that you are Hafiz, my Habibiku."

Habibi took a deep breath and then exhaled. Should he say whatever was once in his dream, should he say the piece of the puzzle that kept spinning in his mind to Zahra. One month of his efforts, he has found nothing to prove that he is the man Zahra loves.

"Uhibs.. "

Drrr.. 🎶🎶

Drrr.. 🎶🎶

Drrr.. 🎶🎶

The sentence Habibi was about to say was cut off by Zahra's cell phone ring. At first Zahra ignored him but the ringing of the phone continued to ring incessantly until he was forced to lift it.

"Assalamu'alaikum," Zahra greeted after wiping away her tears and normalizing her voice.

"Wa'alaikumus greetings. Ra, is your business done?"

Zahra was silent for a moment while looking at Habibi's face.

"It has. Do you need anything? or are the kids fussy?"

"No, the kids are fine. I just wanted to let you know that Ummi and Abi are here now."

"Ummi and Abi are in the apartment?"

"Hmmm.. Ummah and Abah too."

"Sir." The voice across there changed.

"U-ummy. Ummi and Abi why not tell Zahra if going to Jakarta, Zahra will be able to pick up at the airport."

"It's okay, Nduk. We don't want to interfere with your work. Farid said on the phone he said you had an operation so we decided to take a taxi to your apartment."

"I'm sorry Zahra, Ummi."

"It's okay, Nduk. You can go home now, right?"

Zahra closed her eyes for a moment while exhaling her breath.

"Zahra's coming home now, Ummi."

"Yes, if so Ummi hang up the phone. You be careful on the road, assalamu'alaikum."

"Wa'alaikumus greetings."

Zahra put her phone in a bag. Then he looked back at Habibi's face with sadness.

"I'm sorry" he said, shifting from the presence of Habibi.

Without waiting for Habibi to respond to his apology, Zahra stepped through the rain leaving Habibi still standing.

There was a tightness when the word sorry slid from the lips of his beloved woman. For a moment Habibi had pegged in place and seconds later he turned to pursue Zahra who was not far away. He was right behind Zahra, Habibi immediately covered Zahra's head and body with a suit that he had previously worn until Zahra stopped stepping and looked up to look at Habibi who was now in front of him justifying the suit that was attached to his body.

"Don't make me worry about you" Habibi said before leaving Zahra for her parked car not far from Zahra's.

Zahra was stunned for a moment until his consciousness returned after Habibi left him.

"Zahra believes in you. Zahra's sure it's you, Bi. But let time answer them all," Zahra stared at Habibi's back, who started to get into the car.

Zahra clasped tightly to the end of the suit and grabbed it and ran to her car.

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