I'm You And The Past

Hoon's Story

Still at Risa's parents' residence.

"I'm sorry, you've come to lie like this" Risa muttered with an unpleasant face. He let go of their hands.

How long have they been holding hands? until I forget to leave. Emi and Bambang asked them to take a picture together, because it was obviously awkward and clumsy, Risa's parents arranged their poses. Maybe because of the cultural differences that Risa and Hoon are awkward, that is the opinion of Emi and Bambang as parents. In fact, Hoon and Risa are not lovers, being friendly is difficult especially added in front of parents, the difficulty is so double.

Ris sat back by the pool, playing the splash of water with her palm.

Hoon stared warmly at the palm they had just released. He smiled to himself, what is falling madly in love with this? Hoon felt so happy and happy, when what had they done? just taking pictures together, joking together, just holding hands. Sounds ridiculous. Falling in love is ridiculous! and you like that silliness.

Hoon took a seat next to Risa, he slapped the water with his palm, splashed a little into the face of the girl next to him, Risa tried to dodge, but still hit her face.

"Ish, you're a prank!" gusar Risa was upset. He's retaliating against Hoon's behavior. Not that angry Hoon even laughed.

"So happy you are. Usually you get upset, now you laugh!" hardik Risa does not believe in Hoon's different behavior. He's a lot different today. Hoon's smile grew wider.

"Risa, thank you for bringing me here" Risa frowned. He can't believe Hoon thanked them for their lies.

"I've long missed this kind of atmosphere" Hoon said later. She arranged to sit next to Risa, Her body slightly tilted, nudging her partner's shoulders slowly. "I'm happy to be here" whispered Hoon smiling loosely. Risa returned that smile.

"I used to play with nuna-"

"So, what's nuna?" cut Risa. He doesn't understand.

"Nuna is my sister's call" Hoon explained.

"Oh, so nuna's your older sister?" Hoon nodded.

"Yes, my nuna is so beautiful, she's one of Korea's world goddesses!" hoon was proud. Risa made a dumbfounded face.

"Wow, she must be beautiful" Hoon nodded in agreement.

"She's beautiful, smart and -" Hoon thought a little, Risa's waiting for a follow-up sentence from Hoon, but she took a deep breath instead.

"Me and Nuna were very close, we used to play and joke around in the house. My nuna has a beautiful smile, ah I just remembered!" hoon's voice that arrived suddenly shot up, slightly startling Risa.

"That's nuna's first love!" shout Hoon. Risa frowned not understanding.

"Well, why did I forget!" hoon continued to be confused himself, he hit his head in a daze.

"You why the hell?" risa's teasing looks at Hoon's strange behavior.

"You know, director Mei!" Risa nodded, of course she knew, it was the director of the company where she worked.

"director Mei's son is my nuna's first love!" hoon exclaimed making Risa gawk a second time.

"Ahh, dear their love is not good. I don't know what happened until they hated each other" Hoon's high voice slowly descended, he made a confused face. Hoon was confused by her story especially Risa.

"I used to, Nuna and Kai used to play together. We'll go to the playground, buy ice cream until we stop at the game center!" seeing the cheerful face of Hoon who remembered his past made Risa seriously listen. She grabs the setoples of Emi's abandoned snack, Risa listens to the beautiful story of Hoon's childhood accompanied by tengginang.

POVS. Hoon

I was in junior school, while Nuna and Kai were seniors. They always go to school together. They would wake up in the morning blind, prepare and leave me still sleepy.

"Nunaaa.wait for me!" I don't want to eat breakfast anymore, I'm going after Nuna, she always runs off with Kai.

"omaa. nuna and Kai seemed to be dating, they didn't want me to follow them when I played. They also always go to school together" Mama only smiles if I whine spoiled.

"Hoon finish your milk, let's take it"

"Appa, I don't want to be driven by a car, I want a bike like Kai hyung-nim!" I was also confused why when I was a child when I talked I always whined. That sounds more annoying than leaching.

"Hoon, pedaling a bike will make your uniform wet, you will rage" said mama did not grant my request. I'm getting pouting.

"Then tell nuna to go with me not with Kai, I don't like to go alone" again I whine. Papa looked at.

"You leave with appa and the driver, you're never alone." replied papa nudged mama.

"That's not what I mean!" mom and dad don't understand, I don't want to be alone! I want nuna to be with me, Kai sucks!

**

"Aish... Even you're a little 1000 times more spoiled than you are now?" Risa frowned, her gaze looked disgusted and annoyed.

"It must be hard being a family member who has a spoiled child like you!" Hoon glanced at the cynical Risa, she shouldn't have told him that part. Hoon's self-esteem is falling in front of Risa.

"You should be grateful to have good parents and dear ones, you were born with all the good lives. If I was born with sweat and parental effort." continued Risa advising, they seemed to change age.

"Then have you ever asked your parents anything else? suppose a wife from the British Empire is that?" Risa is getting mocking. Hoon continued his story.

**

Our good relationship changed when Mama was diagnosed with a deadly disease. Me, nuna and papa rarely communicate. We seemed to focus on my mom, the worse the day my mom was. At first my mom was diagnosed with a tumor, then I looked for the best hospital and had surgery. Too bad the first operation made a bad reaction. Other tumor cells grow rapidly until your mother's verdict becomes cancerous.

I tried to stay strong in front of my mom, both nuna and papa. I never cried or complained in front of my mom. But the truth is both me, nuna and papa are crying each other. We cry in solitude. I cry behind my door every time I go home and change clothes.

Nuna never went to school. And at that time Kai did not even once pick up nuna. I think they had a deal before. Sometimes papa still go to the office, there are jobs that sometimes can not be represented. At first I thought I was the only one who cried a lot. We all cry in silence often.

I only intend to tell nuna if tomorrow mom will chemotherapy, has been locked in the room all day.

"Missile.." I called her slow, a few days of hospital stays to dry my throat, the nurse had given me a lot of vitamins, but still my throat was not getting better.

"Kai. I'm calling you, why don't you answer my call. Omma is sick, omma is very sick. Omma was crying in the nursery, she said her body was sick. Omma had to smile when she was in pain. I can't see an omma like that, I can't see an omma…"

I could only be stunned, peering behind the door of Nuna's room. My nuna was sobbing that I was crying too. Nuna was right, she was in pain, even though she tried to smile but she suffered a lot. 

"Kai.. You never visited me, is it because my omma is seriously ill? are you afraid omma's disease will rub off on you. You never even sent me a message. Kaii.." At first I thought Nuna was contacting Kai, it turns out she was just talking to our picture. Nuna holds the picture frame. He continued to chatter with dripping tears making a glass blur of frame cover.

I can't call nuna anymore. My voice is finished. Nuna's cry was like slicing my feelings. Nuna hugged her knees and sobbed, and she suffered.

Hearing nuna who kept sobbing I also cried. I can't help my feelings. Mama who is getting weaker day by day, nuna who is getting less and less talk. I don't understand how to. Our warm house slowly dimmed down for a moment

Seriate..

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