GOODBYE

64. between bread and soto tripe

Two years have passed since the death of Kyai Khalil. In plain sight, nothing has changed from the daily life of Akas. Still a master of bread, still regep to the mosque, occasionally berkilaturahmi his friends, or receive their visit, and others as the suit was. Only, his smile was now more and more. The innate smile continues, sometimes grinning. Especially if there are no friends in the mosque because they have gone home. Don't be surprised, he can grin himself until midnight. Fortunately, no one thought him crazy because he was clearly not crazy. Cook wong crazy can “gila” if fell kenclengan mosque? Once put money can be tens of thousands, tens of thousands at that time Iho. Now it is still rare who want that much, even though it is capable.

During that span, Akas continued “walking alone” as mandated by the teacher. Firmly also he holds his message about “silence it's golden”. Maa yalfidzhu min qawlin illaa ladaihi raqiibun 'atiid. There is no spoken word, but nearby is the guardian angel who is always present (QS. Pardon: 18). It is not impossible to talk, but must first weigh all what will be said. Especially if it touches the reality level. Because, this is not the general part. His law was opened recklessly.

And, silence is true “emas” if imposed on the understandings that He gave. Afaman syarahallaahu shadrahu lil islaami fahuwa 'alaa nuurin min rabbihi, fawailul lilqaasiyati quluubuhum min dzikrillaah, ulaa-ika fii dhalaalim mubiin. Are those whom Allah has opened their hearts to receive Islam and then receive light from their Lord (the same as those who have petrified their hearts)? And woe to those who make their hearts remember Allah. They are in plain error (QS. az-Zumar: 22). But the more silence came. The more secrets are opened by Him. This was told in the truth.

In addition to silence, Akas has now come to haqqul yaqin that he has no right to punish all the acts of other human beings. Good or bad in his outward view. Depends on the degree of “fusing rasa” each, but for those who have understood the nature of the Mastermind, must not be able to punish His decree over all beings. But, this did not mean that he was letting slack and obedience run rampant. Akas tells the truth, but does not punish. After being told, yes, back to Him. Because, even telling him this was his will, right? So how can he punish the sins? How can we divide the heavens? To him this was clearly the matter of Dalang, helpless puppet. The Qur'an is revealed as a warning and a guide. Not a sledgehammer....

Time continues to turn. Unaning ning anung remained on his dignity....

Until one day, several months later, Dayat, one of the diligent people to the mosque came to him. “Pak Kas, gumana the way so that people can calm down?” she asked.

“Why, Yat? Tangled very much your face?” Back to nanya.

Dayat did not answer, shaking his head with his disheveled face.

“Why? Business is sluggish?”

Dayat answered with a head. Meaning, no. The business of the soto warteg tripenya who rollover in the square, normal. Tending to rame.

“Sedang war equals wife?” Akas grimacing.

Dayat shook his head again. That means, at home is fine.

“Continue, why?”

Dayat sighed, then told about the tragic fate of a friend who was killed by a car while running in the morning. “Sports is good. But, how to die, huh?” he muttered. “Which does not exercise, even Congratulations.”

“Don't be surprised, Yat. It is so,” Akas replied. He heard the tragic news a few days ago. A group of people who were running in the morning, were dragged by a car driven by a drunk young man. The girl in the car was also stoned. Two of the morning runners were killed, some seriously injured. One of the dead was his friend Dayat. “There's hadith. Innasu niyaamu fa'idzaa maa tun. The man is sleeping well, he will realize when death comes. So said His Majesty Prophet.”

“That's it, Mr. Kas. So, how is this?”

“What's the way?”

“If the end of the model so, we will always have to be ready. Yes, no?”

“Yes yes dong.”

“Well, how can I always be ready? If you are not ready, can you not calm down? If I'm in the warteg, then there's a truck, what?"

Akas. There is just this Dayat delusion. Use the show truck nyelonong all. What if the stove explodes? What if the mountain erupts? What about an earthquake? Or, what if you know how to die alone in bed?

“Where, Mr Kas?” Dayat still demands answers.

Dayat looked at Akas. Apparently, he was not satisfied with this answer, even though it was said to be True....

Later that night, Akas slept fast. That is, so that you can wake up at night as usual. You see, this afternoon tired nian take care of the order of bread that is getting denser. Then, “Kyai Khalil” came to visit. Whether the dream is not, it feels real....

In the “meeting”, Akas was asked to help him clean the body which was about three meters long. The body was wearing white-and-white Ihram clothes. They cleaned it without much talking. After that, Kyai Khalil immediately left. Akas hurried to follow him.

“Kyai, whose body is it?” Akas asked.

“See for yourself,” Kyai Khalil replied.

So Akas came back to see the body. And, surprised him when he found out it turned out “his own body”. When he looked back, the teacher was no longer in his place. Then Akas woke up. Hit it empty past seventeen minutes. Not sleeping again after that, kept awake chanting his asthma. With unaning ning anung who never sleeps....

Ashar Dayat reappears. “Pak Kas, how the hell so that people can calm down?” as said. Just like he asked here yesterday.

Akas surprised. Then, the more amazed when their conversation this time seemed to be a re-broadcast from yesterday's recording. In fact, up to that barreling truck. Dayat is like a person who forgets that yesterday they have discussed this. Not pretending to forget, sure not. Because, it's too natural that this is just acting because he's definitely not an actor. Uniquely again, Akas answers were the same yesterday, if not exactly. Glory be to You, what is the meaning of Your gesture?

And, it turns out that yesterday was not the end, there is still a connection. “Pak Kas, he said if people want to calm down, must know God, yes?” and then Dayat asked.

I was silent for a moment, then nodded.

“Yes right, Mr Kas?"

“Iya,”

“Pak Kas know not how it is?”

Akas fell silent again, looking at the young man who had married and had children this one. That was no ordinary question for those who were really looking. That's a heart opening question, a form of “tag”. Those who do not seek, are guaranteed to be reluctant to such questions. In fact, there are those who worry excessively about this “know”. Mushroom worries he said. Because, Allah is Most Magical, cannot be “seen”. Cannot be “kenali”. Can only “diimani". Though, that....

Huwal awwalu wal aakhiru wadz dzaahiru wal baathinu, wa huwa bi kulli syai'in 'aliim. He is the Beginning and the End, the Zhahir and the Inner, and He is the All-Knower of all things (QS. al-Hadiid: 3).

“Where, Mr Kas? Know no?” dayat asked back.

Akas who was momentarily stunned to find another form of “ signs", in addition to the form of speech earlier, also realized. “This other sign”, within the limits that can be delivered, is like the gurgling of light above Dayat's head. Small, roughly the size of a bekel ball. They are like fireworks. It's green. Maybe Kyai Khalil used to see this in Akas. Because, when the beginning of Hajj Son-in-law asked to be taught the science of "knowing Allah”, he rather long looked at the top of the head of his prospective students while smiling meaningfully.

“Wah, Mr Kas kok even bengong, anyway?" Dayat protest. So, Akas immediately smiled, so as not to be accused of being genuinely dumb by the young man who claimed not to be calm.

“You really want to know God?" he instead asked, Dayat nodded steadily.

I nodded back, “If you really want to, come to my house tonight. Eleven o'clock. Alone, don't bring friends. Before leaving, pray sunnah two rakaat first at home. Take care of the wudhunya, do not cancel until the evening event is over. Insha'allah. How, can?”

Dayat nodded immediately, without hesitation. And, don't ask around “know” again after that. They were still talking for a while, but the topic changed immediately. Now discuss the world of entrepreneurship. Between bread and soto tripe....