Clandestine

My husband and his embrace

“No!

Don't...!”

“Tidaaak...Do not..!”.

“Do not.

love him!”

“She's mine!”

I woke up

from my deep sleep as the sound of that shout echoed ever louder in the

my ear.

I jumped

sitting down, Reinard found himself screaming with his eyes closed. The man's face

so scared and not calm.

“Rei...Rei...build.....!”.

I shook his body but he still didn't shake.

Feeling my efforts

it didn't work, I removed the bolster that was our bed divider. I

a little forward, shaking Reinard's body even harder.

“Rei....build!!!”

As such

surprised, the man immediately opened his eyes. Staring at me with nanar

pulled me into his arms.

I fell silent

for a moment, it was about to push his body away but I did not do it. Breath

the ones coming down and up are roaring in my ears. His body was soaked in sweat

and I'm sure that Reinard's condition isn't okay right now. Contrast with

reinard's habits were so calm and cold.

“You why

Rei?” I rubbed the sweat on his temple. Despite the dim conditions, I

I could see sweat flowing from there.

I've guessed, though,

Reinard did not answer. He just tightened his arm around my waist.

“You're not

what is Jul?” his voice sounded soft and raspy.

“I?” now I'm

who looks confused. “I'm fine. I have been sleeping next to you since

and you keep screaming.”

“Thankful...”.

“Ha?” me

the more I don't understand. I'm sure Reinard hasn't fully realized that

now he is in the real world. “Do you want to drink? How about

white water?”

I've been close

getting out of bed, when Reinard's hand pulled me to stay

in her arms. If only Reinard had done it in his current state

alright, maybe I won't be able to resist my desire to

kissed her. But because of the current condition Reinard is half unconscious and

also terrified, I tried to understand him. Human nature is not if

does he need a warm hug when he's anxious? Think of it as Reinard, too

are so.

“I don't want to

drink Jul.” Said. “I'm afraid.”

I chugged

saliva. The phrase ‘aku-takut’ really touched my mind. Isn't that

I should have said that if he was leaving me

alone in the apartment as usual?

“Good...good…. I

won't leave you.” My answer. “Tapia pa you don't want to go back to sleep?”

Because of my shoulder

it's starting to sting.

“I want to

sleep, but never leave this mattress.”

I nodded

then help him back to lay down on the bed. When I want to

slightly keeping his distance, Reinard pulled me back and wrapped one

her hands are on my waist while her head rests on my chest.

I wanted to

define this position with something else. But when I saw Reinard

comfortable, I just put on a smile, trying to get rid of the thoughts

it's dirty in my brain that comes at a completely inappropriate time.

Slowly pat

his back was soft, and before long I could feel a breath

its weight goes up and down regularly.

Reinard is already

back asleep.

******

“Make days,

I feel that Reinard has a secret.” I tapped my finger on

table with chin support. My gaze was fixed on the crowded street in front of me.

Three o'clock in the afternoon and I took the time to accompany Eli shopping. Today Reza

none of us, and that was enough to make me talk more seriously with

Eli. Because when there's Reza, the edges are definitely I'll just listen

eli's argument with the man.

“Why do you

how's that?” Eli asked without looking at me. He looks out in front

a large mirror to match a few clothes to his body. Actually Eli's body

very nice and I think he can wear any model clothes.

“Lo know not El?”

Eli looked

at a glance, but returned to pick up one of the clothes held by the shopkeeper

the man who had been so faithful stood beside Eli.

“Barin is there

a beggar-father in front of our apartment, when I said I had

meeting the beggar in the office, Reinard's face turned panic and asked me to

avoid meeting that beggar again.” I hold up my seat. “Dia says

beggar is too weird.”

“Ya may as well

it's weird Jul.” Eli said later. “Insting Reinard is better than lo. I

be certain. You are the type of human who easily believes in the appearance of people.”

I'm thieving.

Eli's words have a point, too.

“Take all yes

mbak.” Eli was seen handing over all the clothes he was holding to the waiters

and handed me a credit card. After the officer left, he

come up to me and sit in front of me.

“And semalem him

nightmare. Shouted and then woke up with a pale face and sweat

cold.” I remember what happened last night, and I even felt really good

thumping when this morning he was still wrapping his hands around my waist when

Eli muttered.

“Lo not

Tanya, what dream is she?”

I'm shaking.

“Seems like

even if I asked him too would not answer.” Sahutku. “Lo knows

our relationship is how?”

Eli screeched

small, throw a look out the window before finally opening the sentence.

“Consequences

married because of matchmaking I think it is like that.”

“Teru I should

how's dong?”

“Pelan-pelan

Jul. I'm sure that he'll be the same story as you, if the time is up

exactly how. As a good wife, it is your duty to love her spirit..”.

“That's yes?”

“Ho’oh.”

“Ciieee.

experienced.” My god.

Eli scowled.

“MULai

deeeh...no Reza, no lo, same time!”

I'm back

crotchet.

“Eh, by the way

what is your relationship with Doni El?” I switched the conversation.

Eli clucked, it

choose to rest his body on the chair.

“Barin night she

drunk, keep coming to my house.”

“Totally?”

eyes widen.

“Iya Jul. why

do I have to go to my house? He has a lot of girls.” Eli sewot.

I smile.

“She hasn't moved on from lo El it's her sign.”

“Idiih.

years Jul.”

“These are yes

kayak lo El's. Lo original also has not moved on the same he.”

“Udaaaaah.

“If you have

why not marry again and stop being a player so?”

“Yak because I

trauma Jul. fear of being hurt again.”

I'm thieving.

I don't really understand life after marriage, because I

newlyweds. But I'm sure what Eli or Doni did

all this time is a form of their heart that still has not completely forgotten

to each other.

“El, as far as I know

all sorts of traumas and heartaches will disappear when we are reunited

with the right people. And all this time I knew you just wanted to prove it

on Doni that you're able to stand without him. Doni too. Honestly, with me, in

your little heart is the deepest, her name is still there right?”

Eli breathed

upset breath. “What’an sih lo Jul.” grunt then throw a glance to another—try

evaded me.

******

Me and Eli

split up in the parking lot. He gets into his car which will take him to

photo studio for a photo shoot, while I was about to return to the office for a while

to do some work. Because I want everything to be in order when

I'll go to France later. At least when I'm on vacation, I'm not disturbed

a call from Rini asking about this and that job.

Just now

starting the car engine, Arian suddenly called.

“What Yan?”

I asked after I put the phone up.

“You in Bandung

yes Jul?”

“Bandung? I

work times. Why emang?”

“Gue thinks come

your husband to Bandung?”

“My husband to

Bandung?” I scrunched my forehead. “Suami I work for..”.

“Times yes?”

“Ho’oh.”

“What I am wrong

see ya?”

“Emang how?”

“I think I am

just saw Reinard again in the area of Braga.”

I'm clucking.

“Not likely.

You look wrong at times. She had surgery this afternoon.”

Arian chuckling.

“Iya nih,

I think I saw it wrong. My guy just saw it in the car.”

I clucked

loathe.

“If you are in

Bandung, we can meet up. Want me to meet my new girl.”

“Yaelaaah..

same Reinard's busy boss. Emang lo who can crawl everywhere.”

“The name is young.”

I stared at the clock

on my wrist. It's starting late afternoon, and I should be right back

works.

“Gue close yes

Yan. Back to office nih.”

“OK..OK...see you.

yes Jul.”

“Yeeeepz!”

******