Bound of Lies

Obsessing

Lea: may I miss you Fabian ?

Without me opening the message, I put the flat object back on the nightstand.

"Yes God... Please don't do this, I don't want to hurt her, "my inner self in my heart.

It's been a week since that incident. I never replied to the message Lea sent, because I honestly didn't want to give you hope.

And since last week I have a new habit of waiting for my beloved heart to pass by. Seeing her from afar is enough as my solace. Enough of it to be my strength.

I try to make the day ordinary. I met Alex and Stefan too. Can't be angry can't blame anyone. It is my fault and it is my destiny as well, as much as possible I make peace with the situation and accept all this with a free heart.

This afternoon I drowned in the sea of work after returning from the coffee shop. More precisely immersed myself in a sea of work to take my mind off the thorny problems I was facing.

Ddrrrtt ddrrrtt ddrrrtt flat objects on my work table vibrate. Lea's phone number was on there. Ever since that night, Lea's been calling me again. Heart pounding what has happened something.  Frankly I'm not ready if it turns out Lea has to conceive my son. Let's say I'm mean and selfish but I want to have the child of the woman I love.

The flat object trembled again for the umpteenth time. Finally, with fear, I raised the call.

Fabian : Ha..Hola...

Lea.: Fabian, I don't know which way to go.

Fabian: A. What do you mean Lea ?

Lea. : I'm at Tebet station myself, I don't know where to go to meet you.

Fabian: oh my God, Lea... Wait there find a place to eat or something, I'm there now.

Lea.: All right, I'm at a fast food place around here.

Fabian: okay, wait, don't go anywhere. Don't go anywhere before I come.

Then I closed the call. I look at my face in frustration. Soon I grabbed the keys to the car on the desk and with a little run I tried to go to where Lea was.

I ran at high speed to get there, to be honest I was so worried because he was alone. And a great surprise why you can come to Jakarta alone.

I arrived soon too. With a little run I looked for the woman.

He was sitting alone in a fast food restaurant with a drink in front of him.

"Le.. Lea," I said. Lea raised her head towards me and smiled.

"Ah Fabian, finally able to meet," he said.

"You came by yourself ?" I asked as I sat myself in the chair in front of him.

"Huum, I'm alone. My message is you're not bales Fabian."

"Ah sorry, a. I'm busy," I replied lying. I don't know what to say.

"What's so busy ? Until me, you ignore?"

"What about the courses I offer ? Has anyone caught your interest ?" I asked to distract him.

"Not yet, not yet. How about I take a course here ? So can it stay close to you ?"

I was surprised by what he said. Oh my... Please don't be like this.

"Kok is silent Bi ? Don't you want to get close to me ?"

"Let me think about it first, yes" I hesitated.

"You deliberately went to Jakarta just to meet me ?" I asked with a big chest.

"Yes Bi, you're my world now, you're all I see in my eyes" he said.

My heart was sad to hear his statement.

"Come Leah, it's getting late.  We have to hurry. It will be very jammed when it is time to go home. Let me take you to the hotel."

"I don't want to go to the hotel, I want you to be the same, Bi,"

My head feels like it's about to break hearing Lea's wish.

We finally went to the apartment I was in. Because Lea was so stubborn as to not want to stay in a hotel.

Arriving at Lea's apartment looking around. "Do you live alone ?" Ask.

"Yes I live alone. Where's your bag ? Here you can sleep in my room. This apartment has only one room" I replied.

"We slept together ?" Ask innocent.

I was so frustrated, was Lea not afraid of me after what I did to her?

"You did it meekly and soulfully Fabian, even though you were drunk," she blushed.

Oh my... Of course I did it because I thought he was Renata.

Ah Renata's... I want to throw my head against the wall. Aaarrrgggggghhhh I growled in my heart.

"Bi, can I just keep coming here ? You deny, you did not come to Bandung when you promised,"

"I said I came if it wasn't busy Lea. Sorry to keep you waiting,"

"Do you know Fabian ? I remember you in every breath" Lea said, staring intently at my eyes.

"I'm not a good person, Lea, I hurt you. I have a woman I love" I said hoping Lea understood.

"I don't care, I'll get rid of that woman if I have to" he said, leaving me glued.

Now that Lea occupied my room, I provided dinner at the table that I ordered through an online application. Since our last conversation. Leah didn't show her nose anymore.

After a few hours of waiting I finally decided to leave Lea. I wrote a note at the dinner table that I was staying at one of my friends. It was my intention to stay tonight at Stefan's apartment. I can't sleep on one roof with him.

***

I arrived in the morning at the office. Because yesterday I just left my job to pick Lea up.

Ah Lea how is that woman now ? There's no news yet and I haven't contacted him.

Stefan was so shocked when I told him about Lea and he clearly wanted me. Stefan said maybe Lea fell in love with me ? But it can't be, right ? I've hurt her.

***

This afternoon as usual I spent time in the coffee shop to admire from afar the woman I like, whether love what love but looked at her to be an opium to me.

Drrrtttt drrrttt drrrttt arrived my phone vibrated. A call came in from my apartment manager.

Fabian: Hello

Apartment manager: sorry to disturb Mr. Fabian, there is a woman who continues to shout hysterically calling your name.

Fabian: huh ? In my room ?

Apartment manager: not sir, in the lobby. It seems like you want to be sent to where you work.

Fabian: oh no, don't I'll go home now. Please say wait.

I lifted my body lazily from this chair, I began to get tired of this matter.

It took me a few minutes to get to my apartment. I saw Lea sitting in a lobby chair with tears on her cheeks. I also approached her immediately. 

"Lea," I said slowly.

Lea raised her head to me and immediately burst into my arms.

"Sstt calm down, I'll give you a note that I'm staying at my friend's place, and my work is crowded. Why not phone? Why is this like ?" Much

"I don't want to call later you won't answer, I'm hungry" he replied.

"Let's go up to the room, I'll have lunch. I told you on the record that every morning someone cleans the apartment and you can ask for food,"

Upon arrival in the apartment room, the food that was last night had not been touched by Lea. He should feel hungry. Miss Marni who used to clean my apartment was no longer in place. I breathe heavily.

"You should be hungry, you haven't eaten since last night" I told Lea.

"Have I said I want to get close to you FABIAN !!! " She screamed Lea at me.

" You know what ? I came here on purpose because I wanted to be close. I'll do it every time I come here. Because I'm obsessed with you FABIAN !!!  I'm obsessed with you !!! " She shouted again by floating some objects that she could reach.

I'm really surprised I didn't play. Lea's emotions can change so quickly.

I tried to get close because I didn't want him to hurt himself.

"Sssstttt, relax Lea. Please calm down. I promise I'll come to you. So you don't have to bother coming here," I said after being able to grab it in my arms.

What a shame in my life, this woman is so obsessed with me. I was obsessed with another woman named Renata.

Lea began to calm down, her breathing began to regularize. The glassware was so scattered on the floor because of Lea.

"What should I do to you, Lea ?" I asked in my heart.

Tbc...

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