Between Love and Traditional Java

PROLOGUES

A long time ago, 2 years ago, there was someone who loved me. Protecting and understanding whatever is my burden, whatever I complain about. About love, about hope, the purpose of life, how I should endure, how to solve problems, how I should patiently accept, and be grateful for what I now have. How I have to deal with disappointment because everything cannot be as we want it to be.

He's a stranger I know through Maya. Through typing letters on a keyboard that is full of meaning, telling each other, laughing, there when he teases, sometimes arguing and no one wants to give up. All of that continues until we are both brave to meet face to face, even if only through a glass screen.

Every day he would talk with me, see his smile, hear his voice, be soothing. Even though I've never met him in real. We can connect, always have a topic to talk about. I never get tired of talking to him. Like there's an inexplicable fit. Maybe just hearing it made me fall in love. All I know is that I never want to stop when we've been in conversations even with a simple discussion. All I know is I've always wanted to hear anything about him.

In the third month I knew him, we were planning a meeting. I never thought, even though only through virtual we will continue the relationship more than just friends story. He once expressed his heart, but not too I think because this is just writing, only via text only. But I was a little, yes still a little response, at first, before I really wanted to be with him.

***

That morning, the 18th day of the new year, seemed to be the day I was looking forward to. We agreed to meet for the first time. I hope that at the turn of the year, things get better. Sad that I have been through may fly with the wind, pick up the happy that I have always wanted. My heart was pounding waiting for him, hoping that this meeting would be pleasant and bring new hope to my life. I closed my phone screen, waiting to hear from him. He couldn't possibly break his promise for the first time, I thought.

Heavy rain whipped, the scent of the ground wafted in the air. I hope the water evaporates to a distant place. I waited so long, my phone finally rang. I quickly pressed the green button, the sound of the person I was very much looking forward to. He said he was on the road to my house again, but he went the wrong way. I laughed out loud. She also grins. Then I sent maps via whatsapp.

At noon, he arrived at my house. The first time I saw her smile, it was so beautiful. His nose became a characteristic feature on his face. With a white shirt patterned in sky blue, adding to his impression. Kalem with a blend of black shorts. It’s simple but cool. Then he said softly greeting me, his voice shrill in my ear. I was fascinated, for the first time he was real in front of me. She looked at me with an impressive smile according to my feelings.

She asked my aunt for permission, because my mother was cooking at her friend's family reunion. It's the first time, it's real, he's the first guy who dares come to pick me up. At the first meeting, and she became my first love as well. He was a man who with a short time was able to reach my heart that had been empty all this time.

Along the road accompanied by raindrops, the motor drove slowly, his shoulders out in warmth. Some time we just fell silent, only the roar of the motor engine that passed by sounded confused. The wind blows with silence. Until his voice broke my mind, slowly topic after topic was created, changing stories, joking, and bringing us to our destination.

***

He drove his motorbike, through the sand, enjoying the smell of the beach after the rain, this taste is different. I had so much courage to put hope in a stranger I had not known for a long time. I don't know, as far as I'm comfortable. I began to open my long-lost heart. I really fell in love. An introduction not so long ago, I rashly accepted him. With confidence he would be the only one to accompany and raise me from adversity. It creates the happiness I look forward to. And become the one-funny man who will age with me, with a funny baby.

But in the end, he's just a memory, our introduction is just for the breakup. He only taught me love without being able to take responsibility for the taste he created. Our love is only to hurt each other in the end.

And I'm here now, sitting like I was then, looking at the beach, pondering a long-ago story. I went back to where we first met, to where he was first able to conquer my love, which was the last place I said goodbye to him. Now I just want to remember, what I can still remember, to tell you back to the time that was long over, between me and him. Tells with the wind, that my love once blossomed and then swallowed by the waves and drowned. There was once a man who loved me and then for love he left me.

I'm back here, hoping to see him. Wanted to reveal what I could never say all this time. After a long time, I asked her to meet again. In silence I waited for him. Looking far away, hearing the boisterous wind, trying to make peace with yourself. That this time I came just to stop everything, about taste, and about love.

My heart is pounding what it looks like after two years of not seeing each other. How he lived his life. How many times has he tried to get to know a new woman in his day. How many women expect to be her companion. I imagined it, I was thinking too far what I didn't know. I always wondered. I always wanted to know what he was doing even though our relationship was just a friendship. Because my love has long been decided. But he is still by my side. I really don't understand how this relationship really is. We who are bound in love are forced to separate but he always surrounds my life as if I have been locked away and cannot run away.

Far away I stared at the sound of footsteps approaching. Perched with sand that slapped. It rhymed with my heartbeat getting longer and pounding. My mind stopped imagining how I was going to behave. Will there be confusion between us? How is he now, is he still the same man I first met?

“Hai.”

I looked up, and there it was..