BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT BEAUTIFUL

59. Papa, I Love You

"When do we go home?" ask Ken, after we finished breakfast in the room with a super complete menu provided by the hotel according to Ken's order.

"Going home? Oh, you can't wait to go home?" ken asked, lying on my lap, something that actually made me a little uncomfortable, but he still did it.

"Yes." Yeah."

"Later, I still want to be here alone with you."

"But ...."

"Pstt, there's no but-but."

"We're gonna have to get to work, too, Ken. Moreover, I have been on leave for quite a long time." I have indeed taken a week off before the wedding because there are many things to do, one of which is undergoing treatment as well as the pingitan process required by the mother

"Work? Oh my dear Rara, are you still thinking about work and office? You are very loyal to your job. Since the beginning we know, your totality in working it deserves a thumbs up, next time I will think to give more rewards for the results of your efforts. But you don't forget who is the owner and director of the company we work for?"

"Yes, I remember. You, Ken. My husband."

"What did my husband say?"

"Loved husband."

"Well, that's my wife. But Rara, we're still on leave, so forget the office and everything. Remember, I'm all you have to think about. Understood?"

"How long?"

"Have wanted forever. Both of them, I didn't see anyone. But pity also those who miss us. Aye, right?"

"You're a jayus too, Ken."

"It's a fact, Ra. Oh yeah, you have a dream country you want to visit?"

"Why?"

"I want to take you on vacation."

"Mecca."

"All right."

"But take papa, mama, Aunt Wira and Dinda ya."

"Hahaha, all of you take RT, right-left neighbor, and your friends, Ra."

"So Gita too?"

"Yes Rara. Take Bu Gita too. Already, who else. I'll have a lot of money, no problem gnawing that much."

"Astagfirullah, don't be arrogant Ken. The treasure we have is a deposit from God, whenever it can be taken by Him."

"Astagfirullanin. Yes, I was wrong. Just pissed off. Some of you are very strange, want a honeymoon even invite others. Then when is the time for the two of you if everyone comes along? Boro-boro both, surely you prefer to be with your family or friends. Aye, right?"

"But I do have a dream of sending an old man to Mecca, Ken."

"alright. After our honeymoon. How's it?"

"Good!"

"By the way, there's a letter for you."

Ken gave him a letter he took from the desk drawer next to the bed.

"From papa?" I asked, while reading there is a papa's name there.

"Yes. Yesterday night was left to me before leaving home." replied Ken.

"Why is it given now?"

"Is this letter important, Ra? Compared ...."

"But you love, right?"

"Who cares!"

"Let's see, do you care or not?" Ken smiled mysteriously. "I'm out for a minute, I'm going to see a client. You were here first, yeah."

"Yes." Yeah."

"If there's anything, call me right away. Not for long, thirty minutes at most."

Ken closed the door. I feel like this is a good time to read papa's letter, because Ken is away. If there is him, it will certainly be full of interference with his attitude which since last night changed drastically so spoiled and always wanted to be noticed.

I quickly took out two sheets of papa handwritten paper. The writing that I memorized is right because in the past when papa and mama were still together, when there was a school assignment then papa who will do if I forget or get tired of doing it. Papa was always there for me at that time until finally the divorce separated us, making us like two strangers who did not greet or care.

*Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatu

My daughter Rara,

Today is the happiest day of your life, where you finally find the harbor of your heart. I pray you are always happy forever.

Ra, papa saw very well how happy you are. Your smile is so full of love for your husband. Papa wishes Ken was so with you.

Rara, during the process of meeting up to the reception, never saw papa diverted from you. With all my heart papa trying to hold his head so as not to fall into tears, when finally papa must release you, son.

Papa knows, a lot wrong and less papa. Maybe you will assume, actually papa has removed it from you are still a child. Papa wasn't there when you were a teenager until adulthood and found love.

Rara, papa regrets the days you spent without papa. Papa realized, it turns out not only the marriage of papa and mama that papa destroyed, but also you and Dinda. I'm sorry papa, son.

Now it may be too late, because there are good men who are your life partners. I hope he can be better than this failed dad. I'm sorry papa, son. Don't hate papa. Forgive me for your failure, may Rara always be happy. Papa's prayer is always for you and Dinda.

Greetings, greetings,

Papaw*

These tears have been reading the letter you wrote. The failure you mean had made me in a position of fear to feel love. I shut the door of my heart shut, until I finally felt disappointed in the man for the second time. But now there is no more hatred for papa. I love him for who he is.

With trembling hands, I punched papa's number. The number I once removed due to a misunderstanding during the annulment of the marriage with Arif. When papa tried us, he considered all the failures because of mama's fault in educating me.

[Ra,] papa's voice is across there.

[Papa ..] call me.

[Lho, Rara crying? Why Ra? Rara is okay? Did Ken treat you badly? Ra, answer papa. Tell me what's up? Do you need papa to go there to pick up Rara? Don't be afraid, papa will always be with you, Ra!]

My tears are getting so hard that it makes me hard to talk. The way you answer the phone has made me believe that you love me so much.

[Ra, just shut up? What's up, son? Speak ...] Papa said again still in a panicked tone.

[Rara is nothing.] I replied, after sweeping away tears, then trying to breathe a few times to make this tightness disappear.

[Then why cry?]

[Rara just read papa's letter.]

[Oh. Sorry son, on your happy day, papa even makes you cry.]

[It's okay, pa. Thanks for loving Rara.]

[Bus,]

[Pa, Rara never hated me. Rara dear papa.]

[Papa love you too. Good with Ken.]

The call was switched off after our conversation was over. Now, I miss Papa even more. For a girl, a father is her first love. Although papa once disappointed me, but I still love papa.