To Mutia

Repairing relationships

...TOMORROW THE ENDING CHAPTER WILL BE UPLOADED, THEN CONTINUED TWO EXTRA CHAPTERS....

...****************...

Two days have passed since the revelation of Mutia's lies, but their relationship has not improved. How could Mutia explain everything to Yudha to improve their relationship, if Yudha continued to avoid it. In addition to never visiting him and Joseph again, Yudha also ignored him while in the office. Keep a distance from him as if he has a disgusting disease that will make the man infected.

Even yesterday, Yudha's cell phone number was inactive and the man did not go to work, so Mutia was attacked by a feeling of worry. Fear of bad things happening to the man she loves.

To make sure Yudha was okay, Mutia went to the house that Yudha lived in, but unfortunately. Be Mutia only asked the servant about Yudha's situation, and after making sure Yudha was okay, Mutia decided to go home.

Another case with Yudha who always avoids it, Haikal actually continues to terrorize him through messages and calls for two days. The man always sent short messages or voice mails containing his apologies and expressions of regret, but Mutia never responded. He deliberately made Haikal tormented because of guilt, just as he felt due to the man's actions.

"Mutia, are you sick?" it is a substitute for the good morning greeting that Sriti used to say when Mutia had just come out of the room.

Directing a gaze at Mbah Sriti, Mutia reviewed a smile while pulling a chair and sitting her body behind the dining table.

"No, mba."

A lie! In fact Mutia was in a very bad state. The amount of work in the office, insomnia and the burden of the mind because of the relationship and Yudha that stretched, made his immune system weakened and had an effect on his declining health.

"But your face is pale, son."

Thus Mbah Sriti left the stove, bringing with him a bowl of fried rice. Approaching the table, Mbah Sriti put the bowl there, joining the tableware. And allow Mutia to start her breakfast.

"I just don't sleep, mbah."

How can I sleep well, if when closing my eyes, Mas Yudha always appears in my dreams complete with a wounded look and disappointment. Even the last two days Mutia often hallucinated seeing Yudha come to this house, calling her and behaving as usual, as if there had never been a quarrel between them.

"You better rest, Mutia. It's also free for you to enter work with this situation, you will not focus, there will be later you fall asleep in the office." advice Mbah Sriti. Then he approached Mutia and touched the woman's forehead with the back of his hand.

"You're hot, Mutia. You fever. Better accompany you to the doctor." this time the sound of panic sound mixed worry.

Still with a smile adorning her pale face that had been drenched in cold sweat, Mutia grabbed the hand of Mbah Sriti who touched her forehead, then gave a gentle pat on the back of the hand.

"I'm fine, ma'am. Enough with a little sleep, I'll be healthy again. Don't worry, yeah. It's just a normal fever. Looks like I'm gonna get the flu."

...* * *...

In fact, until the night Mutia's condition did not improve, it became worse. Mutia's body felt so cold, it made her shiver with teeth grinding. Mutia had curled up like a fetus, wearing a thick coat and enveloped her body to the neck with a blanket that was also no less thick, but it did not make Mutia feel warm at all.

Mbah Sriti always check Mutia's condition every hour by bringing warm tea, warm ginger or bread to fill the stomach, because Mutia refused to eat since last afternoon. The woman had also repeatedly persuaded Mutia to the doctor, but Mutia always refused and said she would get better soon.

"Oh my God, Mutia."

When entering Mutia's room to deliver dinner in the form of sum-sum porridge, Mbah Sriti actually found Mutia who was bending in a half-sitting position and spewing all her entrails onto the floor. Soon Mbah Sriti approached Mutia who had returned to lying down, with a step stuttered and his old face showing a worried look.

"Take a lap to clean this" he said after placing a tray of porridge and a glass of milk chocolate on the nightstand.

Mbah Sriti was just about to leave, as Mutia held her wrist.

"No, mbah. Let me clean up later." with a sharp breath, making Mutia difficult to talk, so that his voice sounded faint, but luckily Sriti could still hear it.

"It's okay. It should be cleaned immediately or the smell will trigger you to vomit again." rubbing Mutia's arm that feels hot, inversely with Mutia who feels cold, the old woman reviewed the typical smile of a mother.

"That's disgusting, mbah. I didn't want to let an older person clean up my vomit." despite the pain, Mutia was stubborn.

"To sit down you have difficulty, let alone move clean this." with a tremble mbah Sriti patted Mutia's arm. "Not to think about it."

Then Mbah Sriti came out of Mutia's room. And not until ten minutes the woman's lungs have returned with a rag and bucket filled with water mixed with floor fragrances.

"Where is joseph, mba?" Mutia asked as she stared at Mbah Sriti who was cleaning the floor and did not display a look of disgust at all.

"After giving breast milk he fell asleep." Mbah Sriti directed his gaze at Mutia. "You want to bring Joseph here?"

Mutia shook her head. "I don't want him to catch."

"Then you have to go to the doctor immediately to get treatment." after cleaning the floor, Mbah Sriti put a dirty cloth in the bucket. "Your condition is getting worse, Mutia."

Instead of responding to Sriti's address, Mutia actually tried to get up from the bed, making Sriti's altar that saw her swiftly help the woman sit down.

"Where are you going, Mutia?"

"I want to go to the bathroom, Mbah." while smiling Mutia rubbed his arms slowly Mbah Sriti. "It's okay. I can do it myself, mbah."

Despite his doubts about Mutia's words, Mbah Sriti still gave up his grip on the woman. He did not want to make Mutia depressed because she felt helpless due to her weak body. But just two steps away, Mutia felt her gaze twitch and her head spin, making her body dazed and finally lying on the floor.

The last thing Mutia remembered before losing her consciousness was the sound of Sriti's mummy calling out her name.

...* * *...

It's freaky. For the first time —since the last two days— Mutia could sleep soundly without dreaming of Yudha who looked at her with a wounded and also disappointed look, thus making her lulled and feel reluctant to open her eyes. He was afraid that when he woke up he could not sleep well anymore and he was also afraid that he would again hallucinate seeing Yudha. But the grip on her hand that felt so warm, made Mutia feel curious.

The urge to find out who owned the hand that held it, forced Mutia to slowly open her eyes. Faintly he saw the figure sitting beside him smiling at him, a smile full of relief.

"At last you are aware too." then the figure moves on from sitting. Maybe push the caller button. Then stood half-bending towards him.

"Ma-Mas Yudha." Mutia spoke softly with a sore throat, making her voice sound hoarse.

"No, there is no way Mas Yudha is here." he muttered, then closed his eyes again and smiled bitterly. My hallucinations are getting worse. His mind, because this time the shadow of Yudha spoke to him, was not as usual who just silently looked at him with a disappointed look.

Was it because the love he had for Yudha was greater than the feelings he had for Haikal?

"Mutia, hey, is anyone sick?"

Ah, the voice was too real for him to hear and the warm touch on his arm also felt real, if only a mere hallucination.

Opening her eyes, Mutia looked at Yudha —the manifestation of her mind— who was now so close to her and looked at her with a worried look. While smiling Mutia moved her hand to touch Yudha's jaw, then moved to her cheeks and gently rubbed the man's two eyelids that instantly closed because of her touch.

"It's the first time I've been able to touch my hallucinations." Mutia smiled sadly.

"Halusination?" Yudha clasped Mutia's hand which was used to walk down her face, then opened her eyes. "So... have you ever thought I was just your hallucination?"

Mutia innocently nodded her head, making Yudha chuckle amusedly.

"I'm real, honey. I'm here for you." A second later Yudha gave a kiss on the back of Mutia's hand, along with the arrival of the doctor and nurse who would check on her condition.

...* * *...

"Why do you keep looking at me?"

For a moment Yudha directed her gaze at Mutia, before peeling the apple back as dessert for Mutia who had just finished lunch.

"I'm afraid if I turn my gaze away or just blink, Mas will disappear" Mutia said in a soft voice.

"Oh, dear." Putting the knife and the freshly peeled apple half onto the table, Yudha turned to grab Mutia's hand and grabbed it. "I'm not going anywhere. Don't torture your beautiful eyes. Look, they now look flushed. Come on, blink."

Sighing deeply, Mutia assured herself that everything would be fine. Then Mutia closed her eyes and opened her eyelids again quickly, one blink, two times, and even many times the figure of Yudha did not disappear from before her. Mutia sighed in relief while smiling.

"It turns out Mas really real." His grip on Yudha tightened.

"So you still think I'm your hallucination? After an hour has passed?" Yudha could only stroke Mutia's forehead with her thumb, as the woman gave her a plain nod.

"How can I not be confused to determine which is hallucinatory and which is real, considering these two days Mas always looks real in front of me, but when I touch Mas disappeared. It was so painful to realize that Mas's presence was just my hallucination."

Moving from sitting, Yudha kissed Mutia on the forehead, then looked at the woman from a very close distance. "I'm sorry, Mutia. But you should know, I'm just as tormented as parting with you for these two days."

"Then why didn't you meet me? They always avoid me. Did you miss Joseph? If Mas doesn't want to continue with our wedding plans, just say, me and Joseph will leave, Mas doesn't need to keep our distance from us."

Then Mutia sobbed, making Yudha slightly create some distance and try to calm Mutia while wiping away the woman's tears. But he remained silent, letting Mutia let out her grievance.

"Where did Mas know I was in the hospital?" Mutia asked on the sidelines as hot as possible.

"Bah called me and said you passed out. I'm the one who took you to the hospital."

With no amount of energy she had, Mutia brushed off Yudha's hand and pushed the man's shoulder away from her. Yudha let her body push and sat down.

"So Mas came because of Mbah's request? Not because I care about you, or because you want to meet me? Then Mas's whereabouts here, accompanied me, also because of Mbah's request?" mutia's tears flowed again, but this time she immediately brushed off Yudha's hand as the man was about to wipe away her tears.

Yudha sighed in rejection from Mutia, before responding to the woman's words. "I do care and worry about you, Mutia. When Mbah called me, told me that you fainted, I was really upset. Even then I accidentally snapped at me for not telling me you were sick."

Yudha's confession made Mutia stop her crying, until now only a cough and tears that wet the cheeks. When Yudha again wiped her tears, Mutia no longer refused the man's touch, making Yudha smile.

"And for my arrival. Actually, I've been planning to see you today to solve our problems. It doesn't seem fair, if I don't give you a chance to explain why you're lying." Gets Mutia's hand, Yudha plays the woman's wiggly fingers.

"When Haikal told me that he was your ex-husband, I felt so angry that I couldn't think clearly. Because of burning emotions, that afternoon I vented my anger on you. Sorry." slightly pulled Mutia's hand, Yudha gave a kiss on the back of the hand.

"Then when I got home I immediately commended and prayed, to keep away the demon who kept inciting me. After the prayer I felt calmer, my mind began to clear, but I could not immediately meet you, because I needed to calm down. I'm afraid I'm gonna get out of control and end up hurting you."

"So... all this time I've been avoiding me, not because I hate me?" mutia's black bead looked sparkling.

Yudha smiled and pinched Mutia's golden-looking cheeks. Ah, it's only been two days apart, but why is Mutia so skinny. His mind when he heard the ringing of the woman.

"No, Mutia." Yudha's eyes were so soft and warm as she looked at Mutia. "I gave myself three days to calm down, but last night gave me bad news, so I had to see you sooner than I should."

"And are you sorry?"

Yudha. "I didn't even expect, when I saw you I didn't feel any more intense emotions like that afternoon. Either because the anger has disappeared or because my fear for you is greater than the anger itself. Though I know very well my bad habits, which are very difficult to assuage anger. Just look at how I and Papi are related. But it doesn't matter to me anymore, because the most important thing now is that I can come back to face you in a calm state of heart."

Mutia closed her eyes and smiled. A drop of tears hung in the corner of her eyes, but this time it was no longer a cry of sadness, but a cry of relief.

"Mutia,"

Opening her eyes, Mutia stared at the pitch black spot that belonged to Yudha.

"I know this isn't the time to talk about it, but I need to hear your explanation immediately in order to take action."

"Take action? Does that mean you're leaving me?"

Suddenly Mutia was again frightened. He should never have opened his eyes again.

And Yusuf?

God, how could he be so selfish. Luckily God still gave him a chance to look back at the world.

"Depends, Mutia. If I can accept the reason for your lies, then I will fight for our relationship. But if not, then I'll end our relationship here."