The Perfect Happiness

The Eps 201

Happy reading ...

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Pov Haikal.

“I know Clara and she knows I'm like this. And for shopping here ... he also already knows.” I answered Tika quickly.

Actually all this is just my reason, so that I don't feel insecure for a while. I honestly have felt that for a long time.

After we finished shopping, we decided to have lunch together at a restaurant in the mall. From now on, I could only keep quiet while occasionally stealing glances at Clara, watching her how to serve me food and how to eat her own.

During the meal, everyone looks happy and enjoys it. Occasionally Jefri sounded teasing to Tika and even she often threw her jokes, making everyone laugh. Even Clara laughed.

Yes, Jefri is perfect and Tika fits in with him. Me and Clara?

Again, I think like this. Why is my heart too weak to be a man? Why is this brain always insecurity.

I quickly brushed aside the feeling, threw away all the ugly thoughts that came to my mind and enjoyed this afternoon with them. I must be strong and accept Clara as she is, because that is my will.

Since I love her, let me know her more deeply as I grow older.

Right now, nothing else should make me rethink marrying her. He's my only choice.

Lunch this time certainly feels different because of the presence of a mamah figure. He means so much to me and Tika. And for me, it was the encouragement of mama that made me what I am now. Either in terms of work or love.

And if I recall a while back, when I proposed to Clara again in front of her parents and in front of my whole family, it was like I wasn't myself.

Especially if you see the ring that is currently beautifully circular on the ring finger. Either he remembers that or he doesn't. Clearly, the ring was the first thing I bought when I asked him to accompany me to the mall and it was also his choice.

After lunch, Mom decided to join Tika and Jefri. Me and Clara still have to find some more stuff.

“Yes already, you guys be careful huh?” say mommy to me and Clara.

“If you've run straight home. You guys need a break to the king and queen a day,” Tika's tease on us.

“Iya yes. You also carefully bring the twins together mamah.” I replied to their message.

We split up right in front of the restaurant. Then Clara and I went back to the mall. Wander around there embracing Clara at every step of the way. I also asked her many things, one of which was about her favorite.

“You like the fact if you walk in the mall kayak gini?” Take a glance at him.

“Depends.”

“Depends on what?”

“Ya if the road is the same you anyway, just like it. Want to walk in the cemetery is also okay as long as you.”

I suddenly laughed when I heard her words. “Yes not possible also times, I invite you sons of the road in the cemetery. Unless we're shady again. But do not muterin all tombs as well.”

“I miss mom,” chirps Clara.

I looked back to see it. “You want to nyekar?” bargained.

Clara returned my gaze and nodded. I granted her request. Without going any further, I took Clara straight to the car park, where the car was and we headed straight for her funeral.

“You wait here? I want ...”

“Yes, I understand. I wait here and don't rush,” my lips while pinching her cheeks.

It must be hard for him right now. I have to marry you but in a sad state. He must look happy in front of me but when he himself must cry. Am I being so selfish this time? Did I take away her freedom?

Fifteen minutes had passed and Clara was still sitting next to her mother's grave turned her back to the direction of my eyes. His head was still lowered, as if looking at his round tombstone.

I decided to get out of the car and turn off the engine. Take a pack of my cigarettes off the dashboard. Then ignite it while leaning on the car door. Both of my eyes were still attached to staring at him from a distance as I enjoyed the breath of cigarette smoke embedded in both of my lips.

I know this cigarette can kill me slowly. And I know a doctor shouldn't smoke. But for me, if Clara leaves me or she disappears, that will kill me quickly. And that thought just came. I felt as if he was going to leave me for no definite reason or reason.

I quickly threw away the half-lasted cigarette and stepped on the ground. However, just as I was about to step foot after her suddenly Clara stood up from her seat. Then turn, step towards me. There was a feeling of relief when he saw her walking back towards me.

His eyes glanced downwards, where there was a cigarette that I had turned off earlier. “You're still smoking?”

“If the mind is again chaotic,” sahutku while grabbing his fingers.

“What do you think of now?”

“No.”

“Says if the mind is cluttered smoking. That was a cigarette, wasn't it?” Clara is very good at words.

I scratched my head which was actually not itchy at all. Shame of being caught evading. “I thought of you.”

“I why? I fucked?” Clara made sure.

“I am screwed if you squirm you are sad but in front of me, you must be forced to smile.” I finally gave her the word honesty.

Clara let go of my hand, and her hands cupped perfectly on both cheeks. Her beautiful bright eyes looked deep into my eyes, as if looking for me there. Seeking my other soul.

“I am indeed sad. But I'm happy too. No one can prevent God's will for death. But I can prevent this heart from sinking into that sadness. And you pulled me out of that hole.”

Once again I was touched to hear his words, it seemed like he was getting older in thinking. And it seems like even my mindset is turning childish.

“I am afraid of losing you,” me in the end along with the fall of my tears.

I know these tears feel unnatural if they come from a man. But this is completely pure from the bottom of my heart. I'm really scared of losing him. Afraid of losing the woman I love with all my heart. Afraid that this heart will lose its direction to return.

Clara immediately let go of her hand on my cheek and pulled me into her arms. Long enough to get back in control of my own feelings. Until he finally said, “I love you more than anything. So please, don't even think about leaving or leaving. Because if it happens while we are still walking, it will be more painful than a death.”

Instantly, both of my hands returned his embrace. I love him more than I love myself. And all my willpower was done just to make her happy. Every day that he went through with sadness in the past, I will redeem him with a happiness in every day he was with me.

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