Sendu Sweetener

PS 51 - Statement?

Ghifari. I turned my eyes to the other direction. I am a normal woman who loves him. Why am I talking about love at times like this?

"It should be me and I who are in prison." Ghifari.

I looked at Ghifari. I could see clearly how sad and sorry he looked. I want to rub his shoulder but I can't do that.

"I've been helping Bude Ulfa all this time. He is also the same as your family. Although I always cry every night, but I know that he has done evil." Ghifari. "Gue wants to replace Lo, Ra. I want to change you here. But I don't know how to." Reciprocity.

I shook my head.

"Gue know you're as good as you are. Maybe yes, nyokap you never really evil. I also hated him once. Because how much he betrayed me and real, make me as good as me away from family." I said.

Ghifari looked down, "I'm sorry and nyokap me yes, Ra. I really do ..."

I immediately shut Ghifari's mouth and kept Ghifari quiet, then I pulled my hand.

"Gue knows you're not that bad. Aunt Farha also regretted her actions, right? If he doesn't work, he won't help my mom and I will go out. And you're not wrong, Ghif." I said.

"Do you want to forgive us?" Ask Ghifari.

"Lo is not wrong whatsoever Ghif. I don't think you need to apologize. And if Auntie ... How's mom?" Ask to doubt

"You're angelic-hearted, son." Someone said. "Your mother forgave all the wrongs committed by her mother Ghifari. In fact, everyone who hurt him."

I turned my head and found my grandfather who was not far from my place, "Grandfather!" I said that I just ran to Grandpa but the instant I wanted to hug my grandfather, I remembered who I was, I was just a sinner. "Sorry, Grandpa." I said.

But, to my surprise, my grandfather hugged me. I was so moved and my crying just came off.

"Grandfather, how are you, son?" Ask Grandpa.

I was crying in his arms. He still wants to call me his grandson. "Sorry Ara, Grandpa. Sorry Ara." I said.

"Yes, Son. Forgive grandfather also for not being able to prevent this from happening." Grandpa said, his voice trembling.

I looked up and found my grandfather who was already in tears, I immediately let go of my embrace. "Grandfather, why are you crying?" My toot. Is it possible to see my condition so that he does not have the heart?

My grandfather's tears just fell. Then Ghifari and I asked Grandpa to sit on a bench under a tree between me and Ghifari.

"Grandfather feels very ashamed of you. As an adult male, grandfather couldn't take care of grandfather's family." Said Grandpa. "You became like this because of Grandpa." he continued.

"No, Cake. Ghifari knew that all this time Grandpa was always trying to straighten things out, Grandpa always asked me and Bang Haidar to look for the whereabouts of Aunt Nindy and Ara. Grandpa has done a lot." Ghifari.

I just found out that Grandpa's still trying to find me. Maybe this is the way. Although my father's family was always looking for me and my mother, they couldn't find us.

And... Through Ghifarilah we meet again.

"You great kids. Grandpa's proud of you." Said Grandpa who hugged me and Ghifari.

"I'm not great, Grandpa." I said.

Grandpa let go of our embrace and looked at me. My tears fell again, I felt like I was really an unfilial grandson, I was dirty and despicable.

"I ... I'm a murderer, Cake. I killed my own bud." I said. This time I was crying. "I'm confused grandpa. I'm confused, I ... I know that murder is a sin, but until now, I have not been able to forgive Bude Ulfa." I said.

"Son, what makes you unable to forgive your mistakes?" Ask Grandpa.

"I have no reason to forgive him, Mother." I said.

I picked up a letter written by Bude Ulfa. I gave it to my Grandpa. It's stupid even though Bude Ulfa said that I can't give it to anyone.

My grandfather read the letter. I don't know what to do. After I finished reading the letter, Grandpa rubbed my hair.

"Grandfather, will God forgive my sins? Is God still willing to accept an apology from someone who never regretted committing murder? Will God forgive the sins of monsters like me?" I cried sobbing. He hugged me again.

"Son, Allah SWT is Most Forgiving. Always forgive the sin of his servant who truly repents to Him." Said Grandpa.

"But I'm a monster, Cake. I don't even have any guilt at all." I said.

"Do you really feel guilty at all?" ask Grandpa.

I'm speechless. I can't answer. I'm confused too.

"You don't want to get kicked out of here, don't want to ask for leniency over your punishment, from those two things alone it shows that you're not a monster, son. You still have guilt." Said Grandpa.

I looked at Grandpa. Did ya?

"Why don't you want to be released?" Ask Grandpa.

"I want to make amends, Mother. I'm sincerely here and serving the prescribed punishment." My answer.

Grandpa smiled at me. A smile that was so sad and so sincere.

"That's the name you've regretted what you did, son. If you don't have a heart, you'll be asking to be kicked out of here from the first moment you came in here. But you didn't do it. As you say, you want to atone for all the sins you have committed. It indicates that you are not a monster." Said Grandpa.

I also came back crying. I am so grateful that I was able to meet my grandfather in the midst of my worries. "I love Grandpa." I said.

"Yes, Son. Grandpa loves you too. And Ghifari too. He was the one who planned this, he came to Grandpa and asked Grandpa to help him fill out the lecture here. He's also sincere to you." Said Grandpa.

I looked at Ghifari. Ghifari in place can only rub his nape that is not itchy. Is that how big he is?

"Now Ghifari's mother is reporting to the police." Said Grandpa.

I was shocked to death. "Report yourself to what?" My toot.

"Because you want to make amends for the past." Said Grandpa.

I immediately shook my head. That can't be done. "No, Cake. That can't happen. It wasn't Aunt Farha who caused it all. Aunt Farha may feel guilty because I asked her to explain it at the police station. Really, Grandpa. I didn't know that Aunt Farha wasn't as bad as I thought. He didn't do anything wrong."

"You want to see him, son? Your parents are also waiting for you in the meeting room." Said Grandpa.

I was shocked to death. How'this?

"Find them, son. Don't torture them with so much guilt and worry. Tell me what you want to say. We all love you." Said Grandpa.

I also fell silent and looked down. Then I nodded my head.

"Alhamdulillah. Once grandfather's done, let's go to them, son." Said Grandpa.

I nodded my head, "Thank you Grandpa. Thank you for accepting me as Grandpa's granddaughter." I said.

Grandfather smiled and then he wiped his tears, "Until any time, you two are grandfather's grandchildren" my grandfather said.

Grandfather returned to the Hall to continue the event. Then Ghifari and I sat together again.

"Well, it's me, Ra." Ghifari.

Deg.