KARMA FIRST LOVE

Guilt

After accompanying him to a meal, we ended up on a walk on the sidewalk.I intend to book an ojek in front of the company while enjoying the night air of the city.

"I'll drive you home"

Roan told me

I stopped my steps, he turned towards me after a few steps in front of me

"Sir Roan kanya did not listen to my words earlier?"

I was half annoyed

"I heard, but can I make amends first?"

Sickly speech

"Error?"

I asked with a flat face

"The mistake of treating you unkindly and rudely.Order a long time ago, I wanted to make up for it"

He said while bowed, there was a sense of pity to see him who looked helpless like that

"That problem, I've forgiven and forgotten it.I just don't want to misrepresent Mr. Roan's kindness anymore"

I said while bowed, the words me and Roan seemed to suck all our energy.

"You're not wrong, Lyr"

Roan approached me

"I know your feelings have changed, and they must have changed after ten years or so.People even say that the feeling of liking when you were a monkey's love, but..."

Roan grabbed both of my arms gently making my face meet red.

"Now, I like you...Without me knowing it, I like you now.Seeing you and your friend laugh out of the air has already set my heart on fire"

Roan looked at me deeply, I averted my gaze not wanting to look at him for longer.

I removed Roan's hand from my arm and took a few steps back

It's not fair, I loved it for years and he keeps rejecting me with his attitude,she easily revealed the feeling she had just felt for less than a month to me which I could actually immediately greet warmly with a hug!This is not fair!!!!

I didn't answer, I just ran away from him not wanting to hear his confession again.

How easy I am if I accept it straight away, my pride is torn apart.

It could be that he also actually just feels guilty to me, his feelings are not necessarily true as I feel to him.

I don't know how long I've been running, taking my breath away I'm crying.

That fool even dared to come to me after making me like a piece of trash he didn't want to make me decide to leave school, destroying my own future.

I should hate it, I should!!!!

Now I even hate myself who thumped at his confession!

Dad called me, I set my breath before I lifted him up

"Son, hurry to the hospital ...Mom fell out of a wheelchair, now mom's in a coma"

I drowned at the news, I immediately wiped my tears and headed for the hospital.

***

I held the cold hands of my mother with tears in my eyes, how many times only an apology came out of my mouth.

Although sorry is not enough, even though I repeat it a thousand times in front of the unconscious mother.

I feel like an unfilial child all this time, I always make my parents especially my mother always look at me sad and worried.

I can't be a proud child for my mother yet, mother circumstances like this make me afraid that my mother will go quickly from me without my chance to be happy.

Suddenly the mother dropped, several doctors and nurses entered the room and told me to wait outside.

That night, she was gone forever...

Leaving me and my father in deep sorrow, we felt the whole world was empty even though some relatives even Sendy and Roan came to offer their condolences.

A feeling of emptiness and regret enveloped my heart.Dad several times asked me to be firm and sincere, but I was still dissolved in my own sadness.

****

Some days I refuse to eat or drink, I don't even take phone calls from anyone.

That day I stared at my empty, uninhabited wheelchair mother, still mirroring the gentle smile of my mother letting me go to the office on her last day.

I didn't think it was a farewell smile...

If I knew, maybe I would have chosen to be with my mother that day, tell her all my heart and apologize a thousand times to her.

But now, it's all too late...

Roan standing in front of me made me wipe away the tears from my puffy eyes

"Sir...what's up?"

I said with a hoarse voice

"Father who calls Roan here.Let him persuade you to eat"

Said Dad in a worried tone, then passed leaving me and Roan in the backyard.

Roan sat in front of me while putting a bowl of porridge on the table

"I know you're sad, but you can't worry your dad"

Said Roan thrusting a spoonful of porridge towards me that I did not lyrics at all

"Your father begged me to come here"

He sighed while keeping the spoon back in the bowl.

"Since when have you been close to Mr. Roan?"

tanyaku cynic

"Since I asked permission to approach you"

Deg

Is that how she feels about me?

I looked at him and grabbed the bowl of porridge and ate it myself.

"I've eaten, Mr. Roan can go home.Sorry troublesome"

I held back my own tears

I don't want Roan now, I just want my past.

Because of Roan, I acted foolishly and made my mother suffer from seeing me drop out of school.

Roan left me with shaky steps, occasionally glancing at me with his own eyes.

Now seeing Roan, I remember my mother...

If only I hadn't been that happy with Roan, maybe I would have been a child who didn't worry me to shorten my life.

I can't lie, I love ... I love Roan!!! until I became a fool, even today I thumped at his arrival ...

But my guilt towards my mother really tormented me...

I cried without a sound, I felt this sadness.

mom.mom forgive me for liking it, my mom was wrong if I liked her again mom...Mother !!!!!