Heart Note

LIMABELAS SECTION

I'm enjoying a low alcohol canned drink tonight. Hiccup for the sake of gulps I spent. A little bit bitter but this is the drink that can calm my mind.

" Ayu "call someone. He approached me sitting quietly in the open trunk of my car.

" Ayu "that man is already in front of me. I ignored his presence, I sipped again this drink. Shit's over.

I took another can of those two drinks.

" What happened Ayu "he said snatched the can from my hand.

I took the drink and drank it.

" You know, when Ms. Fatma lost her husband, days and nights she always drank this, when Ms. Fatma said with this drink I forgot my sadness " obviously I remember the difficult moments of Ms. Fatma before she decided to go headscarf like now.

" I used to wonder in my heart what good this alcoholic drink is, now I know it tastes bitter, bitter like my life is now "clear me again.

" Enough Ayu "Rangga took my drink back and threw it away. That's the last can I have. I looked at Rangga's face.

" Rangga, this is what it feels like to be betrayed by someone we love and we believe "I said staring at the sky without stars.

No tears fell without my permission.

" I'm even like a dream, I think this is all a nightmare" I said stammered from crying.

" Ayu, this is not how to solve the problem, I was in your position" said Rangga.

" You know, almost sixteen years into a household, my mother-in-law never liked me one bit, but this has to be the way that I can separate from her child "

" What's my fault, what's my fault "I cried and banged my chest.

" Ayu, let me take you home, you still have responsibilities, you have Rio" Rangga said.

" What is divorce so difficult? " i looked up to see Rangga.

" Ayu? "

" Is the burden of divorce so heavy? " many more.

" Ayu solve your problems with a cool head, do not be rash in making decisions "suggestions advice.

I was crying harder. I don't care if people see me in this situation. I just want to cry. I just want to take my heartache out.

" Ayu "I opened my eyes slowly which felt very heavy. Leo is in front of me. I looked at the clock on the wall. It's ten in the morning. I immediately got up and left Mas Leo for the bathroom.

" Rio "call me when in front of her room.

" Rio has left school" Mas Leo replied to me.

I sat in front of the TV.

" For a while I was in control of your office" I said without looking at him who was sitting not far from my place.

Leo nodded.

" I accept whatever it is "he replied.

" I'll take care of everything, you focus on teaching and being menthor in your course" I said again.

" How will the mother and the woman get out of the house? " many more.

" I don't know " replied Mas Leo.

" I don't want to see them "he continued.

" The money from the sale of the house will be used to pay the salaries of the menthor you cut so far and to compensate investors for money "i explained while replacing the TV channel.

" What's your plan? " i asked Mas Leo who was just silent.

" I've divorced Laras "he replied.

" And your mother? " many more.

" I don't know, I don't care about it" replied Mas Leo.

" Will? " i asked who was curious about Karina's response.

" Karina from the beginning had rejected all this, until the marriage happened Karina could not do anything, Karina now no longer gave me news. Even he had already lifted his feet from the house of "Mas Leo's mother lowered her head.

" You and Karina are good children, it's a pity to have such a mother" I said a little emotionally.

" I'm sorry Ayu "Mas Leo is already crouching in front of me.

Kuelus soft her hair.

" I won't budge from your mother, I'm sorry "Mas Leo looked me in the face.

" Stay with me and Rio, I don't want Rio to be ruined if we have to get divorced "

" And I have to try to be like I used to be again even though it might be very difficult for me" I explained. I removed the tears that had not stopped dripping.

Leo held my hand very tightly.