Behind the Beautiful Smile

Go home to town

The holidays are over, I have not taken care of the transfer letter because I have many times to the school office, waiting for the Headmaster who is rarely in the office. I just took care of myself at the time. But I haven't met until vacation time.

I haven't been able to transfer letters, I entered school when students were looking for a seat. Nothing special when I was in school was needed by ordinary friends. When I came I still bengong asking for a letter to move, finally I asked uncle samil for help.

It turned out that they quickly took care of the moving letter. I said goodbye to the teacher who was present in the morning, the others have not come.

I thank my uncle Samil, but I have no money to pay for his services. Uncle samil is a former principal also in Sd so it is so easy to be respected so a quick business run one day. The principal of the Junior High School met the former principal of the Elementary School. They talked about the problems at school, My principal was busy chatting with his uncle samil.

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Mother, sister, and brother came to pick me up, they were up at night.

Turns out mom and Kaka haven't eaten yet, I cook only noodles and eggs.

I was happy with their presence, but everything changed into a toxic atmosphere.

Uncle Kun commented on the appearance of Ka Hesty's colored hair and sexy clothes.

" Kok's appearance is now changing, hair in the open paint clothes, should be if here covered with his clothes" said uncle kun

"I work in a beauty clinic, well have to look" said ka Hesty

" It's not that your ex-wife also looks so before" said the mother

" That's first, different from your young child soon closed" said uncle Kun

" His name is also his job so, just as your ex-wife also works at a beauty clinic, why sewot with Hesty" said the mother

" Of course, whatever you guys, this is different complex is more religious, not pleasing to the neighbors". Said my uncle while walking to his room.

Aunty from earlier just silent, then said "already horrified, I was sometimes in his lecture, understand new people hijrah"

"The new emang hijrah is blague" said ka Hesty

"Ushh Hesty, don't listen to Auntie"

Reproof mom.

I just silently watched it, while I cooked noodles and eggs.

" Hurry up and cook ren, we are hungry, don't melt" Kaka shouted 

"Hesty this night, sounds your neighbors scream, not like in a city home far apart, as you like to shout, here the house is close together" said the mother

I am even sad to be treated brother Hesty different, once loving now just met so fierce, ka Hesty influenced the same ka malin.

Even shed my tears. While I was sweeping so that they wouldn't look I cried while bringing food. I still want to play with my little brother.

But Kaka I ordered me to take what she wanted with a loud voice.

I was slow, because I wanted to refuse but was afraid that he would scold me. I feel like I'm being enslaved again.

" Ren Kaka Hesty Modallin's mother opened the clinic, you have to know what is ordered ka hesti well, let ka Hesti bear your costs of school" said the mother

"Mom didn't open the business?" Ask me

"Mother plans to open a business, but the holiday is first one month. I want to open a makeshift capital food stall" said the mother.

"Yes Ma'am" I said with a smile

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When I moved schools I was no different from the school, adaptation and introduction. Fun and slang friends even away, friends that I calm approach.

I am soon in choosing friends or hopeful friends with friends who slang end to their bully, in my experience first.

Don't be friends, my brother has just started toxic and bully me.

I made friends who would accept my presence, not be less active and then eliminated. I also have to smile at them even if it is less considered.

I feel comfortable with some friends more than ever. They're more mature. The distance between school and home is 5 km. Ride the angkot and walk into approximately 2 km.

I am still used to come slow, well some friends do not like me, some are still between likes or does not remain friends with me.

Junior High School clothes here are more common or open to the eyes of the legs and arms or hair. Different in the village all simultaneously wear a hood that is his women, his men's trousers.

I first entered using a hood, considered a pious child, but ordinary just like them. Before long my teacher rebuked me for changing clothes like the others for uniforms. I also want to not want to follow the rules, very visible my skinny arms and legs. Add their bullyan to me.

Plates, flagpoles, sluggish, and disconnected. I try to smile. That I was ready to accept their input, even though I was hard to change.

There are men who like me, I refuse, I say I don't need a boyfriend. I just need friends. Shame to be dating a class. He's not stopping to bother me. Sometimes I am embarrassed, I am not even angry.

I am confused here I am praised beautiful, but I have many shortcomings stand out. My friends like my nose.

But the other friend threw away his face, not so fond of the shortcomings that stood out from me.

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Ka Hesty is 180 degrees different, whether because of my envy, or teaching me to be respectful/fearful to him, fierce, bully, or, or like to command in a loud voice if not obeyed head I was hit with his hands really like a child if it was like that.

I remember very well the unpleasant events in my life, I am not a grudge but I remember and I forgive. 

Why do I forgive because they contributed in financing school and educating me even though it was wrong. Very differently my mother educated more gently and patiently. Due to economic factors mother asked for help aunt and sister.

If I want to joke with Kaka even though it's a subtle innuendo, my head in the tabok again, I cry not in his looks. Just like you Malin treated me first. 

His command according to his own wishes did not set an example. If it is not appropriate or slow I bullied oon. Mother is not defending me, mother like a sense of helplessness as well, because mother still partly rely on finances with Kak Hesty. But Hesty's brother became rude and brave against mother and father.

"Ren, why are you dressed like this in the room, quickly grab oon!!" Saying to Hesty.

"I forgot you, because of your oversaturation sleep"

My speech

My head's on the pentok again his glaring face. I also fell silent. Want to cry definitely add on the pentoknya. 

He often splashes his clothes on the floor and in the bathroom. Wake up he is more day.

I often get up late, often late for school. Ask for help delivered by mother, I was even in angerin ka Hesty my head at the beat. I don't know how many times I've been hit in the head.

Eat too he often buy outside too, eat good, treat his friends eat, a lucky life surrounded by many friends.

Starting from the first ka hesty is good at getting along, ka hesty helps the mother in the stall first, she can make money from the results by taking as she pleases, she wants, he can buy nice clothes for himself and go for a walk with his friend.

I can't, I dare not ask. That shirt is all. I'm not jealous but people's judgment of me is always negative, I'm from a family quite enough why can't wear nice clothes. I said I didn't dare ask for more or take more, because mom bore us a four bee.

I remember very well, Hesty's employees made fun of me too, but ka hesty scolded them not to make fun of me oon, because only ka Hesty can call oon.

Maybe with my actions this is said to be stupid and oon. I was too honest and did not dare to fight.