Second Road

Episode 22: A bad childhood

"Oh, so your name is Haru, yes." Said the man with a smile that looked horror in my eyes.

I retreated slowly, fragments of past memories flooded my brain. Fear and trauma haunted me when I saw the man.

Without caring about anything, I ran away from them. I'm not too sure what's going on with me, but I've rediscovered one part of my bad past before I lived in an orphanage.

I went back to class alone. Slowly, I adjusted my breath that was slashed after running from class 1-E on the first floor to my class, 1-B which was located on the second floor.

My panic slowly disappeared. I leaned my back against the back of the chair, trying to make myself as relaxed as possible.

For a moment, I thought about it again, I mean about that guy, Evan. That man was one of the people I had hoped to leave my life for so long.

If necessary, he'd rather die. Oh, let me tell you my relationship with him. Well, maybe I'll tell you from the beginning. From how I started life, it continued to grow until it became what it is today.

Do you want to know? All right, maybe a little bit of a picture will make you understand how I lived before.

I'll tell you briefly, yes.

First, about my parents. I never met them. But, from what I heard, my father left me to his sister who could not have children when I was a baby.

I still remember that woman who took care of me, I called her Aunt Rika. He treated me well, took care of me since I was two months old. Feeding me and thinking of me as his own son.

If I remember, it was like heaven. I never thought of anything, just fun and play. I can laugh and smile at all times.

She also taught me to read since I was three and let me spend time with books. She's so gentle, maybe that's the definition of a mother.

Her warm touch and her soft words. I always remember, the first woman I liked. He was the one who gave me life and light just from seeing his smile.

And about my mom, I don't know much either. But, from the rumour I've heard, my mother is dead. That's why my father left me to his sister.

And now, I don't know where the father left his son. Well, even so, I don't really care. If he has decided to leave me, then I no longer have any reason to want him.

When I was four years old, Aunt Rika, as the woman who took care of me began to fall ill. He was often bedridden, coughing heavily and sometimes also dizzy.

I was too young to understand what was going on. I didn't know that if my light went out, my life would soon turn dark.

After a month of aunt Rika getting sick, I was taken by someone I didn't recognize. The man said that I would be taken care of by another family.

Aunt Rika can't keep taking care of me and I know that.

At that time, I hoped that this family would take good care of me and treat me like a child.

Maybe hope is too hard to live with. I thought everything would be okay was wrong. I'm too naive. At the new residence, I lost my smile and laughter.

Compared to a house, the new place is more suitable if it is called a prison for me.

"Never get out of this room."

That was the first sentence that came out of the mouth of the big hostess that I was going to live in.

His face was like saying that he was not happy that I was here.

"If you still insist on going out, make yourself invisible to us. Food will be delivered twice a day by a domestic assistant. You can go to the toilet and take a shower. Can't take any food or stuff outside this room."

The lady of the house who was round in stature mentioned the rules in her house. He looked at me lazily, as if he saw something disgusting.

Her short, undulating hair framed her round face, making herself twice as scary.

"Then, you can't talk to anyone, no play outside, no watch tv and you can't bother my kids. No sound and touch anything. If you break, you'll receive the consequences."

The woman turned her back after putting me in a stuffy room. Instead of being referred to as a room, this room is more like a suitable if it is referred to as a warehouse.

The lighting is not good because the lighting is only using cheap lights with 5 watts of power. The air is a little stuffy and there's a lot of dust here and there.

I sat on a thin bed that lay on the floor. Slightly hard, but still can be used to sleep.

There was an old pillow and a blanket that faded in color, it was not clear whether the color was blue, or just ash.

Many boxes and old items are stacked in each corner of the room. Plus, the size of this room which is only 3×3 meters makes it seem narrow and dense.

I accepted all that, I followed the rules of the hostess for two to three years and it was a very long time.

I can walk around the house or just go to the back garden in silence. That's the rule, as long as I'm invisible to them.

It made me used to walk to settle the precipitate, my footsteps became light and I could estimate anywhere the position of everyone within a radius of a dozen meters.

My body also became thinner and my skin was pale because it was rarely exposed to sunlight. I went out quietly a few times after making sure no one was home, just to breathe fresh air and feel the warmth of the sun.

The food I eat is also far from nutritious. Sometimes I was given one or two slices of bread without jam. Or if I'm lucky, I can eat rice with tofu or fish.

The housekeeper who delivered food to me sometimes added something to eat like fruit or cake.

He was a good person, sometimes he also invited me to talk quietly and clean the warehouse where I slept. Sometimes he also gave me some old clothes that are still good for me to wear.

Every day I spend playing with old stuff in the warehouse. Or read an old book in cardboard boxes, spelling out little by little until I memorized each word and punctuation.

The problem that arises is the child of the hostess. Two brothers who get everything, and it means everything. Whatever they ask for they get.

The son of the hostess is two brothers, the older brother named Gavin, seven years old. And Evan's sister, who's six. At that time, I was only about five years old.

These two brothers knew where I was in that house after a month of living there. I live without sound, quiet and calm.

Until one day, they saw the housekeeper opening the barn door while carrying food.

They found me and it's not a good thing. They didn't invite me to play or make friends. They began to disturb me and disturb my calm.

This is not an ordinary suggestion, you could say, if I was bullied by them. Sometimes they beat me up, or throw me things in the barn so everything falls apart.

"Please, maybe we'll leave you sooner today." Said Gavin, the older brother. He grinned and took one hit using an iron ruler.

Plaque...

The ruler hit my back and it hurt a lot. The part of my body that was hit by the ruler's punch was pulsating.

"Me too, cry and I'll stop working on you." Evan said with a little laugh. He used a lidi as a coward.

I sat down trying to protect myself from their next blow. I was alone and helpless. Everyone seems to hate me. I live without knowing what my purpose is.

I, who was five to six years old at the time, never put up a fight. The rules given by the hostess seemed to strangle my neck. I can't bother his son.

The fact that I never bothered them is true. But unfortunately, I'm sure that this hostess will have more confidence in her own son if I had complained. After all, my status is just hitchhiking.

They locked me in the bathroom, tied me up in a basket until they bit or slapped me several times. My body was covered in bruises and wounds because of them.

They were happy to torture me and make me cry until I begged them.

Sometimes, I cry alone at night, and reflect on my own fate. How could a five-year-old like me have a bad day, while another child could happily play and be affectionate.

That's why I hate them, so much so that I wish they were dead and gone from my life.

The housekeeper who had seen the two brothers' treatment on me several times couldn't do much.

Until one day, my hand moved by itself and accidentally pushed one of them, Gavin the older brother, until his head hit and bleed.

It was enough to make the hostess angry and send me to the orphanage.

"You're done here, you psychopath!" The hostess was holding the head of her eldest son who was bleeding.

"I told you, don't bother my son! How dare you hurt her! Go and enjoy your worthless life! You don't know thank you! Don't know shame!" The big madam came up to me and yelled at me, while occasionally pushing my frail thin body.

And finally, I was sent to the orphanage right then and there. There's no second chance to stay there and I don't want to be there either.

In the orphanage, I could at least feel my own life, without having to stay inside the warehouse all my life.

And after that, you know what it's going to be, right? I don't need to talk about it anymore, because every time I remember it, my breath gets tight and my chest hurts.

That's how it happened, I met Evan again. People who used to bother me when I was a kid. I feel a little scared when I think back to that time.