Rinai Rain

Part 21: Before

Part 21: Before

Alvia Darsya Princess

   My spoon is not lost by all who come. Not even the birds that chirp make it disappear. A bright morning made them chirp to welcome the incoming sun. The remaining shadow of the moon is still left waiting for sunlight to remove it. The piercing coldness of the morning can still be endured by the layer of school uniform I wear.

  I put my right foot on the bike. This morning the car was not used by me. It's okay to use the bike to enjoy the streets of Pekanbaru today.

The school looks empty to the students. Pekanbaru is still too early if it is this hour. It is only fitting that they are still many who are stuck at home. I'm gonna walk my feet up to the basketball court to find Azka. No wonder Azka played basketball this early. It had become his daily breakfast\-day as a basketball elder in school.

On the basketball court there was no sight of anyone. There was only a passing wind that made the basketball hoop sway. Not far from there someone sat where Farel was usually aloof. The hijab-wearing woman was seen relaxing enjoying the cool morning breeze. My heart moved to him.

"Hi, Cess," I said as I sat beside her.

   He returned with his smile. The sunglasses aligned with those narrowed eyes. Sturdy in contact with Cessa's pointed nose. The white hijab she was wearing wrapped her beautiful hair.

"Hi, Alvia," she replied. His hand holding a food box approached me. Two loaves of bread adorned the food box. "Want? Take one. That's Farel's allotment every morning" he bargained with me.

   I did not refuse his offer. A sandwich was ready to complete my stomach which was filled with breakfast at home.

I bit a small portion of that sandwich. It was clear the texture of the tomato slices along with the soft omelet that was being stirred by my tongue. The sour taste of tomatoes is united with the savory omelet taste delicious when swallowed. No need to stop by here first.

"Farel has breakfast here every morning with you, huh?"

"Yes, including often. He's the one with the breakfast."

I'm patting slowly. He knew Farel so well. He even made breakfast every morning for Farel. Actually, I'd like to ask you something about Farel's real situation. I was afraid he would get hurt because of it. Actually, he didn't know if I had eavesdropped on their conversation yesterday.

My heart dared to ask about Farel.

"I want to know about Farel, Cess. Was Farel really sick from his depression? And he's back\-\-"

 

   I wanted to stretch out my words, but it was too hard to say that Farel was taking those drugs.

Cessa answered my question. He understands what I mean.

"He's back on the sedative. I'm afraid he's back to what he used to be,"

"But why are you hiding that from me?" ask again. Silence struck for a few seconds. Cessa can't say\-words.

"Farel himself asked to hide it from you. He doesn't want you to be disappointed" replied Cessa. His hands closed the food box he was carrying. He rushed back to class.

The wind hit us both. Wiggling every flower that was in front of it. Shaking each\-heart nan we got.

   I have no power to hold Cessa back. I still want to ask you all the things I don't know. There was too much they hid from me until I was immersed in my own confusion.

"He loves me?" tanyaku brief. He stood up but did not step foot. That question hindered Cessa's intention to leave.

"Ask Farel himself. I couldn't figure it out" replied Cessa. His fingers tidied up the location of his glasses were not right.

There was sadness on his face. He could not hide the sadness he showed.

    "I'm sorry I took Azka from you, Cess. I don't know at all. I'm really sorry. If only I had known-" My words were cut off by Cessa's sentence.

"I never regretted it, Alvia. I'm ready for this. I am ready when the one I love will never again reach the hope I have set. However, I will never be ready with my friend who is hurt" replied Cessa. He immediately left me here. There were tears flowing down her cheeks.

I've been making too many cries lately. Hurt Cessa by taking the heart she had chosen and tearing down a Farel who loved me so much.

    I misjudged the Cessa I once considered a rival to the point of making me die of jealousy. Instead of forgetting the rain-waiting, it turned out that I hurt both of them.

    If only I had stayed and let time reveal everything, I wouldn't have painted tears on their faces.

    I don't know the reason why every twilight for me is so beautiful. But it began at dusk that afternoon, when his comfortable shoulder became a pillow for me. It was a week before his sudden departure. It's Zaki, the guy with the guitar.

The coastline that runs along the city of Padang becomes a silent witness when the twilight comes. The waterfront that directly overlooks the Indian Ocean is full of beautiful twilight scenery. It looks shiny as the sun slowly moves west. The reflection of the light on the sea water is like a mirage in the middle of the water. Move\-move with the incoming ocean waves.

    The squeaky melody of Zaki's guitar adds meaning to that twilight time. That melody I no longer heard when he left me. Only dusk on the beach can replace it.

    I opened this window wide. I let the twilight breeze enter the room filled with the smell of this medicine. I think his condition has improved over the past two days. My longing overcame me for not seeing his face. Azka didn't know I was visiting her. I knew he would be jealous of this. But if he finds out, I have a clear reason for him to be angry because I came to Farel.

"Why did Alvia come here?" ask Farel.

"I want to pick up my guitar that missed two days ago. How you doing, Farel?"

     I approached. His face grew pale because he was not exposed to the sun. Besides defending the field in the air-conditioned room is not good for him.

"Oh that. I'm sorry I knocked down your guitar. Stringer section broken Alvia. Sorry, yes" replied Farel.

    I saw the state of my guitar, it was exactly what Farel said.

    Farel you are the only person who ever destroyed my guitar, I growled in my heart. I can't be angry either. I'll leave.

"Later to fix it. Take it easy," I said.

I went back to the window to see the bright twilight. The sun is moving west. Increasingly leaning as the clock ticks which indicates six o'clock in the afternoon.

"Cessa heard what I was talking about with Cessa two days ago?" ask Farel. I understand what he means.

"No. I didn't hear it" I replied.

"You lied to Alvia,"

I'm silent for a moment. His attitude forced me to admit the truth.

"Oke\-okay, I heard everything. Everything you said to Cessa and all Cessa said to you. Did you love me long ago?" The sentence suddenly\just came out without arrest. I kept my mouth shut because I didn't believe what I said.

Suddenly the tib\-all of a sudden the door opened. Azka came with her quick steps. He pulled my hand.

   "It's too far, Cess. Let's go home," he said.

Farel held my hand. His palm felt really cold.

    "I won't hide anymore, Azka. Let him know. I love her."

I was surprised to hear his words. He was so loud and serious\-really. However, Azka who was riding apitam immediately held Farel's collar. The powerless Farel could only remain silent until the fist landed on his face.

"Enough, Azka, I don't want any more. We broke up!" My words stopped Azka.

    Azka looked at me still with her anger at Farel. His breathing seemed irregular and filled with emotion. Slowly his hand was taken off Farel's collar. Farel fell on the floor covering his face.

I pushed Azka. "Enough Azka. Go you!"

"Alvia." He said my name.

"You knew before that Farel loved me and you hid it by cornering your best friend? You rotten Azka! it's rotten!" i told him. I was very upset by his treatment of Farel.

    "Yes, it's all true, Alvia. That why? Because I've loved you ever since we met. I was the one who loved you first, not her" Azka replied. His hands are still clenched. I won't let him touch Farel again.

"But I love Farel more than you."

"OK, if that's what you want. You've broken someone else's heart again." He left with all his anger.

   I hugged Farel who was squeaking pain from the blow from Azka earlier. Looks like his left temple is slightly stuck. He immediately climbed onto his bed while picking up a blanket. He wrapped the blanket all over his body.

   "Alvia, please go. I want to be alone" he asked me.

He really\-disposed me face.

***