Rinai Rain

Part 13: The Feelings

Part 13: The Feelings

Farel Star

    Cessa was sitting in her daydream in an iron chair behind the school. As usual, the sweet hijab woman always looked at the flowers that were blooming in front of her. His gaze was blank motionless even if the bee he liked moved around in flowers.

His daydream broke when my presence approached him. That soothing smile I finally found. He said softly beginning talks between us. The fragrant bushes of his body thrust into my nose. The same perfume after all this time we were friends.

"Farel, you don't tell me if you were born yesterday to Randi with his friends\-them same?" ask Alvia to me.

"They're who?" askaku. He breathed out quickly to hear my question.

"Azka and Alvia dong. Who else? Why are you just telling me the same story?"

"I just don't know who I can tell except Cessa" I told Cessa.

  All this time I was closed for fear that others would know my past. Because for me the closer someone is to me, that's where the greater their chance of knowing my past is.

"I'm asking you to change. Try their same story. Get closer to Alvia. Same story he. If possible with Azka who is also your friend. I'm not always next to you Farel. You have to be able to interact with other people" Alvia said to advise me.

    I saw a lump of pain painted on his face. It's not usually his facial expression like this. I'm sure something's draining his mind.

"What are you thinking, anyway?" my many.

"No, I'm just thinking about Azka. Do you think there's still a chance I'll have it?"

I was silent for a moment to hear Cessa's question. That question he asked me a long time ago. But I am not a sure answer. He has loved Azka for a long time. Azka always tried to avoid it. Especially since they are no longer the Chairman and Vice President of OSIS High School.

"There's always a chance for you, Cessa. What is less than you? Beautiful, sweet, smart, and much more. I know Azka must be thinking like any other man. It's just that Azka is ashamed to admit it" I replied.

"What if he already has someone he likes?" ask Cessa again. Instantly Alvia's face flashed across my head.

"I will take it for you until you can continue to pursue Azka" I replied.

Our ears stood up to hear the announcement that was roaring in the school toa. At the beginning of the sentence was a name that surprised me, namely my name.

"By Farel the Star......" The crowd asked me to head to the Headmaster's room immediately. I left Cessa alone and ran to the place mentioned.

Randi and his friends\-his were already there first. Behind them stood their parents. This is what I call a school donor. Their parents gave more money to this school. Their clothes indicate they are indeed from the top. Each\-eye looked at me cynically hoping for a punishment that would incriminate me.

"Farel, you're suspended for three days for allegedly committing mistreatment to Randi and his friends\" the Principal said.

    I picked up an envelope containing a letter addressed to my parents.

I saw Randi and his theme\-friends smiling to see me take the punishment. Their faces were full of bruises I gave them a few days ago. I just find it funny considering that seven people can be defeated with just one person.

"For you guys, you're at\-scores a day because it's been bothering students at school a lot" the Principal told Randi and his friends\-his.

The parents were satisfied with the punishment. They left this room and left me and the Headmaster alone.

The Headmaster approached me.

"Yes, Mom, I realized I was wrong to beat them up."

Suddenly someone opened the door tightly. The anxious paras approached. That worried face was mixed with the anger he was feeling. Two people followed him from behind. Their anxious eyes looked straight at me trying to uncover what was going on.

"Teacher, Farel is not wrong. Those who disturbed Farel first. I don't want Farel suspended" Alvia protested to the Principal. I was amazed by Alvia's call to the number one person at the school.

Alvia the Principal's niece? I don't know about this at all.

"The tech can't do much. Farel was shown beating Farel and his friends. The parents threatened Farel to be reported to the police" the Principal replied.

     Alvia was instantly speechless with her answer. The principal knows that I have bad memories with the police. He's one of those people who knows my past. He doesn't want me to be stuck in custody anymore.

"Udah Alvia, the Headmaster is right. I'm used to gini-rich\-scors. It's even been a month." I pulled Alvia's shoulder. However, he resisted and insisted on lowering my punishment.

"Farel, you are\-\-" He hit me and left us. It was clear tears were soaking her tears. Azka quickly caught up with him.

I should have been chasing him, not him.

My eyes were staring blankly at the closed door. And so did Cessa. I know how Cessa feels now, exactly the same way I feel. I took a breath and pulled Cessa's hand to leave the room. His hands felt cold like mine. Cold as ice frozen by the cold of a broken heart.

I did not lead his hand. However, he directed myself towards a quiet, silent place. The most comfortable place for me and for him after the seat behind the school.

    Our steps rang between the two-meter-high bookshelves. The books are neatly organized according to the type of book. The smell of the dust of unread books began to smell. However, a typical scented room freshener disguises it. We sat in a reading corner that I often made a place to calm myself from the symptoms of anxiety that I often felt when at school.

    "Are you okay with your punishment?" ask Alvia.

   I kept quiet and didn't answer. All I saw was a sad face that he still maintained from earlier.

   "Farel, I just had it, you know," he said.

   I still don't answer. His eyes were looking at me, but he looked empty and empty. It was as if something had just been taken from him.

     "You jealous?" tanyaku brief. He's speechless. He was seen throwing his eyes away after the question. His lips seemed unable to speak.

     "Cessa, are you jealous?" ask me one more time. He kept his eyes off me. I knew he wanted to avoid it, but he couldn't.

    He took a breath trying to say, "Jealous of whom?"

    "Azka, who else? I know how much you love her, Cess."

   "No, Farel. You should be jealous!"

    Slowly her tears formed a line that presumptuously fell on her cheeks. It does not sob as the cry of a broken heart in general. It's just that I know he's still keeping that emotion without it coming out.

   "I don't care about my feelings. All I care about is you, Cess. I've always been used to being hurt" I said in his ear.

    I hugged her. Her tears wet my chest. I stroked her hair that was covered by a thin hijab.

   "You evil Farel. You always don't care about yourself. You only care about other people" he said to my chest. His words were mixed with the sound of crying.

    "Because you're my best friend."

    

    Just remembered that Cessa has always hugged me here. He was always there for me even at the worst possible point. No matter whether there was a smile or a cry that broke. He will come without me asking.

    Now he is in my arms. Thinking of something that had always drained his mind. Hope this love is no longer one-sided love. One-sided love that sometimes does not know the end to make its adorers destroyed and fragile.

***