Married to My Own Gus
sin word
I cried as much as Gus Baha' who was in front of me in wonder, seeing me crying all the other santri-wati, who also got the picket job cleaning Ndalem follow me in wonder and run towards me.
"What's the matter Nda, what's wrong with you" my only friend in the cabin hugged me, she was like my mom, she was always there when I needed a hug, she was always there,
"What's up Gus...Why is he crying so hard" Nyai's mother came in tergopo-gopo, it seems he was praying, or teaching, he still uses the face, heard me cry he immediately ran out of the room.
"You're doing him Baha'?!" Back I asked.
"She's kesambet Mi'.he must be in ruqyah" Gus Baha' answered arbitrarily.
"Honey alone, I'm admitting shethan" I dare to take a photo to the handsome man in front of me, I'm angry he said I'm kambet and must be in ruqyah.
"O Allah, you strange lhaa, I've spoken politely, I've even said the word 'me' to be polite, not to use the word 'I' to be more polite, I was just talking to ask her to clean Mi's room, she saw me not blinking, I've been repeating the words politely, but she still didn't blink, I said 'Sin' and she's crying"
"already...Umi' know, well maybe this is just a misunderstanding, you santri wati new it right?!...the good nggeh" Have a smile at me, telling us to get out of Ndalem first, right, ndalem's clean-up duty continues tomorrow again.
Cold nights, after prayers, congregate'ah all dinner, but I don't want to queue, I'm not hungry, I choose to sit alone thinking about Dad, are you tired of facing a child like me? I miss Dad.
Everything will go on with time, no one knows when he will leave this world, it is only the secret of God...Mother always taught me about rights and obligations, although insolent and insolent, prayer I never left, actually I just want to be understood, I just want to be understood, losing the people I love makes me want to protest at destiny, but what can I do?! I can't do anything about it, is it time I said, I give up? it won't be that easy.
The feeling of kangen with Alm.Mom made me cry again, and the memories with my loved ones sprang up without ceasing, my anadai could turn the clock, I don't want to be here, I want to be with my family, I want to be with my family, I love Dad so much even though I'm 'Ndabek' but honestly I just want to open my heart, I hate this situation, I want to run, repeat time but there's no way that's not going to happen, I'm staying right here.
at twenty-thirty minutes, in the morning the santri must have woken up, but with me not, (amit-amit in love shetan) but the word Father at twenty in the morning is the right time to pray Tahajjud, ask for Pardon from God, ask for help from God, ask for help from God, I remember Dad used to wake me up praying, but I'm 'dumb, better sleep'.
So even here even though everyone prays and even though it is not the father who broke down I still 'kebo' sleeps soundly, no matter who.
