The Ultimate Soulmate's

You're Not Alone, I'm Here

When Junghwa came to my house tonight, I was just escorted by my mother to my room, after meeting with a psychiatrist. "How's Hana doing?" jonghwa asked my mother. "The doctor said, physically, Hana did smile, but she was mentally hurt, her emotions were chaotic and mentally depressed. Hana was entering the early stages of depression, Junghwa," my mother replied, crying again, as she did in front of the Yongju ash house this afternoon. Junghwa hugged my mother, "Patience, Bi. We can only hope for the best and hopefully we are all strong through this" he said. After that, my parents asked Junghwa to stay at my house to accompany me, just to comfort me.

In my room, I sat on the edge of my bed. As if waiting for her to arrive in my room, I immediately spoke as Junghwa entered. "Junghwa, they call me crazy. But I don't care. Even if they said, Yongju oppa is no more, I still don't care. Those who do not know that oppa is so alive, even if only in my imagination, as they say. Even now, I see oppa smiling at me. As if, he was there," I said as I pointed towards Junghwa standing up. "But why is it that every time I extend my hand, he suddenly disappears?" I bowed with my hands that I put down.

"Oh!" I suddenly felt when I remembered something. I stood up and approached Junghwa, then pulled him towards the bed. I'm showing you the albums that scatter over my bed. To Junghwa, I opened each of my childhood albums with Yongju. "You saw for yourself, didn't you? Oppa lives here too! From all the memories stored in my heart, I gathered them all here, connecting them together. Seeing all this, I recalled the days of elementary school. When all of a sudden the oppa grew tall, it became even taller than my body," I cried with a happy expression on my face. Meanwhile, Junghwa only watched me in silence, without listening to what I showed him.

Not satisfied until there, I even replayed my relationship with Yongju which I projected through the video. Memorable video of Yongju getting a little piano gift from my parents. Where Yongju who has loved music since childhood, played the piano for me. During the video, I sat back sweetly on the edge of the bed, staring straight at the screen attached to the wall of my room. "I remember back then, the piano was taller than me, but I forced my oppa to teach me. I could never play it again because oppa took it away" I said. Junghwa looked at me. "I miss him. I miss when Oppa touched her with his little finger. I know, oppa used to feel very good when he played the piano with me sitting next to him," continued my increasingly soft sound at the end of my sentence.

Junghwa stared silently at all my madness. Especially when he saw me watching it with smiling lips, but with crying eyes. And for some reason, he also felt it with every burst of pain in his heart. Junghwa wiped away her fallen tears, violently. Then, he walked towards the tightly closed curtains of my room, then opened them wide. Both of my eyes also reflexively closed due to glare. "What does noona intend to rot in this room without light and without eating at all?" asked Junghwa who had just opened his mouth. "Said eomma, noona just locked herself in the room and had been all day, not eating and drinking. Has Yongju hyung gone to seal the wounded noona's heart again and make noona's body even reluctant to live?" he continued with a nag in front of me.

Later, Junghwa switched while taking a tray containing my dinner on the table. Junghwa sat beside me. "I know, maybe it's an unrooted oath. But before hyung died, hyung had already asked me to swear an oath to look after noona. So please eat a little, "he asked, putting the tray in his lap and intending to bribe me, but I refused. "How about drinking milk before going to bed?" he picked up a glass of my favorite chocolate milk. Again, I shook my head. Junghwa sighed and gave up. Then, he turned to sit on the floor, kneeling before me.

I touched his face, Junghwa put his face in my palm. "When since I last touched her?" I said slowly and made Junghwa look at me confusedly. "Touching an oppa face that looks like you. I remember, last night the oppa kept looking at me in silence, but always smiling when caught. It was unthinkable to me that that voiceless light smile was full of meaning to his departure," I continued, crying again. Junghwa closed his eyes, feeling a failure to calm me down. "I'm sorry. Junghwa, if tears are measurable, it takes a long time to dry them out. But I didn't manage to hold it by your side, if at the moment, I find you very similar to that hyung of yours!" I continued in the middle of my sobs.

I was crying hard. "Now, I can only look at her from afar, without being able to hug her again. And could only say inwardly, I regret it, I regret rejecting it. I love her, Junghwa. I didn't understand what he meant at the time. Back then, I thought, I was satisfied with just looking at it. I was ignored by him and he made me look for his successor. But it's still him I miss. No matter where I am, he always takes care of me. But I didn't know it would be the last. He said he wouldn't leave, but he actually left me like this. I can't be alone without him, Junghwa!" I said, getting hysterical.

Junghwa hugged me, "Noona, calm down! Don't worry even if hyung leaves because we will do very well. I remember, when I first met noona. Noona is a strong woman. Even though we end up not being able to relate to hyung anymore, never feel sorry for him or feel guilty about him. Trust me, we'll meet again with hyung. So, no matter what our future shape is without hyung, let's meet again with happiness. Before the time comes, let's hang on together happily, noona," she asked, hugging me even tighter.

It didn't take long, the tranquilizer that eomma was taking to me before Junghwa came, it worked. I fell asleep in his arms quietly. Even so, I could still hear his voice that seemed to resonate, wandering aimlessly around my room. "Sleep... You're not alone. There I am here. You and I will always be together and I will never leave you forever." he said gently, tightening his arms, it made me feel a warmth so comfortable with the same scent of his body as he hugged me in the rain, under his black umbrella that day.