The Ultimate Soulmate's

I'm Lonely, But Today I'm Happy

"In the midst of the vastness of the ocean, a whale spoke softly and quietly. In fact, no matter how much he screamed, the screams did not reach anyone, making him even more lonely until he closed his mouth without a sound. Do you remember that fairy tale that oppa used to read to me?" I said Lee Hana, then 14, to my 18-year-old cousin Min Yongju. "Am I not like that whale, oppa? No matter how much I say I like you, oppa still doesn't care about me at all and instead makes me even more lonely with the intention of leaving me alone!" I continued while instantly covering my mouth with a frown as not a word came out of his mouth. Embarrassed, I turned around and left Yongju still in shock with my ridiculous declaration of love. "Actually, I just want to know, who am I to oppa and how does it feel to me?" I asked, a few seconds before I reminded her of my favorite fairy tale.

Yeah, I just declared love to my cousin's sister. Cousin brother who always acts indifferent, but secretly very attentive. Rarely talk, but once talk too honestly as is until sometimes painful. "Basic tsundere!" I scream every time I get upset with him. Yongju was also very lazy to move, but the edges always obeyed whatever I wanted. Stern brother, but still I have always followed his promise since his arrival in this house. Yongju came to this house as a cousin on my mother's side. Yongju has been living in my house ever since his mother, Min Mirae, who is my mother's older sister, passed away carrying with her the secret of who Yongju's real father was. My father, a vice-director of Jeon Group, one of the largest companies in the world, and my mother, a marketing director at a leading entertainment agency in Korea, K Entertainment, were always busy with her world. So, even the lonely me made my world with Yongju, until that comfort turned into a liking that should never have existed.

"Of course, you're my sister! So, I beg you after this, don't ask such silly questions again!" yongju said as he clenched his hands together with a cold expression on his face. "Because it's also a question that I have and I don't want to know the answer," he said at the time, which my ears could still catch even if they barely sounded. I cried while running to my room. Since then, there has been a distance between us. And Yongju made that distance even further by deciding to get out of the house and stay in the dorm as one of the trainees at the agency where eomma works. "Wicked Oppa! I hate oppa!" I shouted as Yongju pulled the suitcase without turning a single glance at me. Brakk! I slammed the door of my room with all my might. "Well, now I won't care anymore about oppa!" I said sobbing as the only thing called loneliness was left by my side. "I've become really lonely like that whale." I cuddled up like a shrimp on my bed hugging my knees.

***

Time passed without excuse. It doesn't feel like two years have passed without Yongju by my side. I was great without parental attention, making me accustomed to solitude and introverted behavior. All the luxuries my parents gave me, made me not need anyone's friends. Besides, since all this time, I grew up with only Yongju, I don't know how to look like a normal girl. Yeah, I grew up with tomboys. Black short shoulder-length hair, shoes, trousers, oversize shirts and oversized hoodie jackets, are things that can not be separated from my daily life. As well as a hat that always covers my beautiful face that has never been touched by makeup. Also a headphone that always perches in both my ears.

"Fuck, now you're really an idol!" I swore in my heart while smiling behind my hoodie as I saw a news story on my phone screen. Drrt... Drrt... A message came in, and I opened it. "Are you okay?" ask Yongju across there. "I'm fine," I replied briefly and slightly indifferently. In addition to the distance we created in our own individual ways, this usual flowing chatter also became a wall between us, that our relationship was just a brother and sister exchanging news from afar. My smile returned as I read, "Take care of yourself," Yongju replied no less briefly. "As usual!" I muttered, then put my phone back in my jacket pocket.

I went back down the road listening to music in my ear while staring silently at the scene outside from behind the car window that brought me home. Still as before, I loved everything about my cousin, including the songs that always accompany my days through my favorite headphones, a gift from her. Yeah, maybe I'm the only one imprisoned in this feeling of liking. Somehow with Yongju, I never knew his true feelings for me.

The car that took me to a big, luxurious house that always felt like hell to me. "You're home yet?" ask eomma. I frowned looking at it, a rare sight, "the eomma was home at lunchtime like this?" my thinking. However, not wanting to bother, I handed over my diploma and report that I had just taken along with the butler in this house to eomma, sighing in disappointment. "If there's time to go home, why isn't there time to go to school?" I thought again while looking at this 45-year-old woman who still looks beautiful and youthful in front of me, without daring to ask directly.

Eomma greeted him, "have you taken it? Sorry, eomma didn't get there," he said, stroking the tip of my head, then returning it to me, without even looking at the contents first. "Again?" I thought with a smile and greeted him. Either because I'm sure the value of this only daughter who is always proud or because it does not care about my efforts to learn. Though it was my only attempt to attract the attention of my parents long ago, but I always failed, even without any congratulations or graduation celebration that I got.

Even at school, I no longer felt jealous of my school friends who came and went with their parents, like when I was in my first school. For me, it was common for someone else to come, whether it was one of the servants in my house or one of the employees from my parents' workplace. Until I had stopped hoping that it would be my parents or just one of them, let alone an idol like Yongju.

"Lee Hana!" call out to the eomma who broke my reverie. "What do you think about not hearing at all the eomma call?" said wonder. "What's wrong?" tanyaku. "Aish, you are! Go to your room! Yongju left something for you," replied eomma who instantly made my eyes sparkle. I ran straight to my room and sure enough, a bouquet of white carnations with red tulips, and a black box was on my desk.

After inhaling the fragrance of the flowers, I opened the rectangular box. A necklace with an initials H pendant is inside. I smiled and put it on my neck. Then, I continued by reading the greeting cards tucked in there. "Congratulations on your graduation. Sorry, oppa can't come anymore. Hope you like that thing, if you don't like it, throw it away" Yongju wrote. "Creatures?" I said with a frown. "What does that mean?" I said again confused, but had not been able to think of the answer, I felt a soft sensation in my feet that made me instantly jerk.

"Cat?!" I said surprised to find a kitten rubbing its body on my feet. I also screamed with excitement and immediately carried her. Since I was a child, I have wanted to keep a cat, but Yongju did not allow it. The reason was simple, because she was annoyed at me who always called her cat-like. "Beautiful!" I said when I realized the cat had a pair of bright blue eyes like the ocean. The little cat meowed with its adorable sounding voice. "Their death!" pekikku again while gently stroking the white fur of the British shorthair type cat. "Oppa, I'm happy today. Thank you" I said, hugging the gift from him.