RAGIL (First Love)

EIGHTEEN

The feeling was embedded for so long that I did not know what the limits of feeling and reality were within my heart.

-azka

Azka and Saga chose a corner of the room that was not too crowded. In the corner of the room there is a row of chairs that have been partially filled. They occupied two empty seats. Some guests choose to stand and circle the tables of the food huts around the room. The sound of songs with the theme of love echoed throughout the room.

"Want a drink?" saga's first question was spoken since arriving at the building.

"Let's take it together" said Azka preparing to rise from her seat,

"No, I'm the one who took it"

"Eh, it's okay, just together" forced Azka

"Don't, sister, we'll have a drink standing up. Want to?" tanyanya while blinking one eye

"Oh-Oke" Azka agreed, He does not want to eat and drink while standing if the chair is occupied by someone else.

"Later I find a snack for us" he said as he passed by to call the crowd to the food lodges scattered in the room.

Azka lowered her head, picked up the phone and looked for Ocha's contact. He called his best friend.

"Hello"

"Hello Cha, what are you?"

"I, again, did not say anything. It's Sunday Ka. I was relaxing" replied Ocha from there.

"Oh, hahaha. Cha, do you know where I am?"

"Where? I obviously don't know Ka. I'm here and you're there" Ocha replied using a trending tune.

"Hahahha, I'm again at Irine's wedding, Rasha's cousin" Azka said calmly.

"Huh????" Ocha was surprised. There was the sound of some things falling down.

"The cha? Hey, you okay?" ask Azka worried.

"Eh-yes Ka. Sorry-sorry. You there? Whynot? Same who?"

"Yes, I came, because Irine invited me. I'm with Saga. Who else can I ask? Hahaha" Azka replied, luring at the end of the sentence he said.

"You met Rasya?" ask Ocha carefully, "Is he alone?" Ocha added

"Hey, do you know anything?" Azka frowned at Ocha's question, "I haven't told you about Rasya before, and I just found out if he really moved on. He's with a girl here, I don't know what her name is"

"Emmh, sorry. I was gonna tell you about this. A few days ago I met Tama. I also saw them meet at the bookstore I went to"

"So you know?"

"Sorry Ka's. I don't think you need to know any more information about Rasya"

"Yes, indeed. Haha. I'm just a little surprised. They look appropriate"

"You also fit in with Saga Ka."

"Oh shut up Cha. Don't talk about it" Azka prevented Ocha from continuing her talk, "Oh yeah, so what about when you meet Tama? Is he still avoiding?"

"No, it seems like he can act ordinary, even he who greeted me first Ka. Huh, but it seems like he hasn't changed. His heart is not for me"

"Hey, don't be sad. I am sure every heart has. You will find the owner of your heart, and He must be the right person" Azka consoled Ocha.

"Aamiin, thank you. You are the best friend." Ocha paused the sentence, "Hey Ka, don't be there too long. Go, don't stay too long in the same place as Rasya and his girls"

"Hahahha, okay Cha. But I'm fine, Cha. My heart really feels nothing. Just at the beginning, that guilt and longing just popped out when I looked at him. I've always missed meeting him, wanting to say sorry and after that I won't feel guilty anymore. And today was the first time we met face to face after that farewell." Azka sighed softly. "Looking happy, I don't think I owe anything. In fact, the farewell brought him to meet a woman who must be better than me" said Azka slightly commenting on the smile.

After a while the two of them talk, Azka bothered to hang up the phone because she felt Saga would be back soon. Ocha turned off the phone after greeting each other. Azka put her phone back in the small bag she was carrying when it felt like someone was approaching her.

"Have you? Why so lam-" Azka did not finish her sentence when He turned around, not the Saga He found but Rasya.

"Huh?" Azka was confused. What does Rasya mean?

"The name of the woman you discussed with Ocha is Naya. So don't call her 'the girl'." Rasya said in a cold tone.

"Oh-hem, sorry. Thank you" Azka so his own response because from the sentence Rasya described that he heard his conversation with Ocha.

"Why did you come here Dek?" rasha asked later which made Azka more wrong.

"I thought.."

"Is it because it's my family's event, so you wish you could meet me here?" the tanya again cut off the word Azka.

"No, I didn't know you were coming"

"Where might I not be present Dek? It's Irine's wedding!!" his voice sounded higher.

"Ah, Yes. I'm sorry, I only respect Irine who invited you. I won't be long, after Saga returns, we'll say goodbye to Irine and go home" Azka said quickly. His eyes escaped the view in all directions looking for Saga's whereabouts. Where are you Saga?

"I didn't kick you off the deck. I'm glad to see you after that" Rasya's voice began to sound weak, "So, you're the same guy?" tannya

"Oh, Saga? Nope. Saga's my assistant on campus"

"Or are you still harboring feelings for Ragil?" her question was a little offending.

"Oh my goodness, what is on your mind? I-"Azka was at a loss for words, He was unable to say that He did not have those feelings, while He knows and is well aware that the feeling is embedded for so long that He does not know what the limits of feeling and reality are in his heart. That feeling was already ingrained in his body.

"Hin?" Rasya raised next to his brows, "Sir, it's time for you to stop to think only of others. Afraid to start just because they're afraid they can't find you? Or do you just pretend to have forgotten your feelings so that the person who is with you becomes happy? but instead of being happy, it hurts others. If you still have feelings for Ragil, fight.don't let your curiosity hurt others again" Azka was speechless,

"I don't know what you mean sister" Azka finally made a sound.

"Daddy, is it really my fault? I used to accept you, so accepting of you even with your feelings for Ragil that I knew it wouldn't go away"

"Sister!!!" Azka was surprised, It felt like he wanted to shout in front of Rasya, but he could stand it. He knew where they were, "I never pretended. As long as I'm with you, I've never pretended sister" Azka took a deep breath. "Sir, pliiis!! don't discuss that issue. There is a heart you must take care of right now. We're done, and the breakup wasn't because of my feelings for unfinished Ragil. Nope. I'm sorry brother" Azka tried to hold on, but the puddle in her eye was unstoppable. The sparkling thread finally fell, and broke on his hand. He rubbed it, removing a trace of tears on his cheek.

"Sister, I'm sorry. But can we finish with that discussion? I really never pretend. And I'm happy to see you're now happy with N-Naya?" He mentioned the name Naya. "You gotta be happy, okay?" Azka looked at Rasha inside,

"Hm? Yeah, I'll be happy"

"Good" said Azka happily. Azka sees Saga approaching hesitantly, Azka does not know if Saga has been there for a long time or if he has just come, or pretends to just come?

"I'm saying goodbye, brother. It's nice to meet you. Good luck with Naya" said Azka approaching Saga, pulling her away from the location. Azka walked quickly away from Rasya, hoping that after this, her feelings of guilt and longing would be left in that place. Azka really hopes that after this, they can live a normal life, without any emotional debt. Perhaps they would meet again someday, but Azka wanted after this, they could meet in peace. In each other's happiness and can behave more normally.

"Drink?" ask Saga when Rasya is out of sight.

"Thank you"

"What are you obrolin with?" Saga asked as Azka had finished the drink in her small glass.

"There's nothing"

"Hey, are you brother crying?" saga asked when she saw the trail of tears on Azka's face. It was obvious that the girl was crying when she saw her wet eyelids.

"Oh, no. I was flickering"

"Hahahaha, what kind of lie is that?" Saga laughing.

"Huh?"

"Learn to lie properly sis" Saga still laughed

"Huh! I never lied to you! Let's go say goodbye. Irine's already in the veneer"

"But we haven't eaten yet?" Prevent Saga when Azka starts walking after putting her glass on the table.

"We will eat it later" Azka said, continuing her steps.

"Huh?? Oh My God!!"