RAGIL (First Love)
TWENTY FOUR
You are someone I don't want you to hurt my heart, just because I'm in love too much.
-azka
"De, Om Robi is planned to be here in two weeks, all of you look at Mbah" the information that you convey to Azka while both are cooking in the kitchen makes Azka stop his activities.
"Oh, are you going to Mbah?" ask Azka relax.
"Yes, you come here with the family" said Mama looking at her daughter who was still reluctant to release her eyes from the green vegetables in her hands.
"Where are you here?" tanya Azka pretended not to understand.
"Yes here, to our house" Mama had put down the knife she had used to sing the onion duo to make Spinach vegetables, "Sama Nak Romi too"
Azka pegged for a moment, the name was called again. Mama's slightly careful way of speaking made Azka even more afraid. Will he really marry his childhood friend? What about Ragil? Ah, one more thing, what about Saga? The two of them had not spoken again after the incident. And if Azka will be proposed by Romi, then there will be no more stories between them. Finished, before it ends well. Azka murmured to herself, not intending to answer Mama's words.
"Ma?" call Azka after a long silence,
"Yes?"
"Can I refuse?" tanya Azka was afraid
"For what reason?" mama asked, Mama touched Azka's chin carrying her face to look at Mama, "De, if there is a good man of his religion coming to propose and there is no Uzur on the grounds of shari, we can't refuse. Who knew it was the soul mate God sent for Ade" Azka was fixated on Mama's words. He agreed with it, but on the other side of his heart he felt unprepared for it. Unprepared to make Saga hurt, unprepared to make anyone else again hurt, unprepared to-to relinquish her feelings on Ragil. Ah, at a time like this Azka was still thinking about that man. A man who always has a way to break his heart. Men who even so always want to be guarded by Azka feelings. The man that Azka did not want her to hurt her, just because she was too in love.
"Ade is not ready" Azka said looking for an excuse.
"That's not the reason De, marriage can't be that simple. After all, Nak Romi still has to go to China he said, so his wedding will not be done anytime soon" Mama sighed softly, "De, uh, if for the next two weeks there is no one to ask Ade, we cannot be wrong with the good intentions of Om Robi and his family. Ade istikharah is now"
"Dek, our family and Om Robi's family are close by. We are like brothers. We know how they educate their children. Son Romi, it's good, sholih, smart, and we know how the environment. Mama and Papa had no qualms about the problem" After saying that, Mama took over the finished vegetables for Mama to wash. Furthermore, the cooking show was only continued by Mama assisted by Bude.
The azka? Azka chose to go to the room to calm herself down.
---
"How should I be Cha?" Azka complained while drowning her head under the pillow. Ocha who asked Azka to come to the house is currently in her room. Sit on the side of a king size bed with arms folded in front of the chest.
"Mama really Ka" one sentence that emerged from Ocha's lips sontak make Azka wake up, Azka,
"Yes, I also know Mama's real" Azka snorted in annoyance.
"Before Ka. I'm not done talking" said Ocha again, "Kalo-This if yes, Kalo Saga who came here to see Papa? you're gonna fuckin' this up?" Azka was stunned, looking for answers in her heart.
"Emm- Not like it. It would be easier for me to think of receiving Saga than adding wounds to others. At least Saga knows my condition and she's willing to accept it. I can't be honest with Romi about all this. It will definitely open wider my wounds Cha. The worse it was the more I knew how flawed my heart was" Ocha smiled faintly at Azka's reply, but a moment later she looked more grimacing,
"I asked, where is Ragil?" Ocha immediately closed her mouth as she realized what she was saying.
Despite the omission, Azka heard Ocha's words. He also thinks so. Where's Ragil? After quietly coming, he once again left. Ragil has Azka's contact, why don't you call him? He may still be on duty, but why can he be in Bandung and not all of you meet Azka? Is this another game?
Memories of the tenth grade just turned around. At that moment, Ragil who had just enjoyed his time actually started to dare to act. Not a few women want to be around him. Ragil chose Dinda, a friend during Junior High who had been assessed by him. He expresses his feelings, but is rejected by Dinda. Dinda who is famous for being very beautiful with a body so that it does not accept Ragil, because he was already interested in his schoolmates. Ragil who felt hit like he got a fresh breeze when Rasya actually said that Azka liked him. Ragil thinks that Azka could be his escape. At least, he will not be rejected by women who really like it, right? Unfortunately, the news of Ragil rejected by Dinda quickly spread throughout the school, including reaching Azka's ears. So does Ragil's intention to express his feelings to Azka which is like being a public secret, just as Ragil's escape from his illness is rejected by someone he wants.
As if he had fallen, he fell down the stairs. It was quite a parable to describe the fate of Ragil. Azka refused. How could He accept the pretended statement that Ragil uttered? While at that time Rasya was more sincere to be beside him. Azka suppresses her feelings deeply, does not want to be carried away by emotions and prefers to use logic. He simply rejected Ragil, trying to hide the pain he felt. Pain that is more painful than just being rejected. There Azka began to fear. Afraid of his feelings for Ragil that was already deeply embedded in his heart. Afraid of being hurt by Ragil again. For Azka, whoever broke her heart, she could have survived, but not if Ragil did. Azka felt it enough, and though she was still immersed in the pit of her first love, she was not ready to be hurt again. Really, He did not want the figure of Ragil changed in his eyes.
"Ka?" Ocha disperse Azka daydreams
"Yes?" Azka gasped, hurriedly turned her head and put on an expression as usual.
"So, what are you going to do about it?" Ocha continued their discussion which was paused long enough by their respective minds.
"Entahlah Cha. I can only pray. I hope whatever happens, my heart is strong. I believe God's plan will not go wrong. I also believe that Mama and Papa just want someone nice for me"
"You're giving up on destiny right now?" Ocha paused her sentence, "Sorry Ka, I mean, so you'll start letting go of everything to follow what Mama Papa wants?"
"I never gave up Cha. I still hope" Azka's voice sounded soft.
"Who do you expect more?" Whatever Azka answers, Ocha will always be appreciated.
Azka exhaled slowly, hoping that what she had felt all along was a hint to choose.
"Saga" Azka's reply really made Ocha happy.
