RAGIL (First Love)
SEVENTEEN
How many steps have we taken away from each other?
-azka
That day Azka chose not to contact Saga first. He would wait for Saga to contact him, thus he would admit his mistake and apologize. After meeting with Kara that afternoon, Azka spent the night replying to Kara. He contacted Azka this afternoon via a short message. Kara is really a cheerful person. Although Azka had only met him a few times lately, Azka felt very comfortable being friends with Kara. He does not hesitate to tell his story, He will be very chatty and expressive when telling all his stories. But as if a chameleon, he then turns into a good listener when it's Azka's turn to speak. Unique blend of characters. Good talkers, and good listeners. Ah, if Azka had known Kara for a long time, perhaps it would have been more comfortable and relaxing to spend her days on the land of the region.
Can you come out for a second?
I'm in front of the house.
Let's go talk.
Three messages into Azka's phone made her gasp and immediately rise from her fall. He hunted the mirror, tidied up his clothes, polished his face with thin powder to make it look fresher. Azka approached the door, but before opening it, Azka peeked first from behind the curtain. A man stood straight facing the road. He really recognized that figure, someone who had accompanied him for the past few years. Sagas.
The sound of the door opening, making a male figure in front of the fence Azka house immediately turned his head. He smiled as usual. Azka returned her smile. He then allowed Saga to enter and sit in the chair in front of Azka's house.
"Wait a minute, I'll grab a drink" Azka went back inside the house, preparing a bottle of water and two glasses arranged on a tray. He took it, placed it on a table that separated the two chairs they were sitting on. Azka poured the drink into the two available glasses, then thrust one of them closer towards Saga.
"Drink Ga, sorry can not be available to others" said Azka invited her guests to drink.
"Yes, thank you, brother" Saga took the glass, and downed it a little.
"So, what do you want to say?" ask Azka without a stale base. It is better to the point, however, they both know that the previous meeting makes both feel equally bad.
"Ehm, about this afternoon, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have maksa you sis" Saga began,
"Oh, yes. I'm sorry too. I was so emotional that I got a little angry. I'm sorry if I hurt by going that way Ga" Azka replied to Saga's apology. Saga smiled hearing that.
"Emm- But I was thinking, there's no harm in me stopping by your house for a minute." Azka paused, noticing Saga whose expression turned in astonishment. " Em, but don't make your parents misunderstand me, please introduce me as a friend. How's it?" Azka waited for Saga's response. The man in front of him seemed to have lost his sentence in surprise to hear what Azka had said.
"Seriously???" only one questionable word was said from Saga's lips? A smile was clearly imprinted on his face. Azka nodded, returning that smile.
"OK" he answered casually, but then – "Wooohwoooow!!!"Saga slightly shouted in excitement.
"Srsttt, Ga! Later neighbors on the annoyance!" azka told Saga to shut her mouth.
"Hehehe, sorry"
Saga took a break after having a little light conversation with Azka. Azka drove him to the front of the fence. He waited there until Saga's figure disappeared with the roar of his motorbike away. Azka let out her breath slowly, took a breath back, then threw it away again. He calms himself. His decision really scared him. He was afraid that what he did would bring Saga to the inevitable pettiness of his life.
Azka decided to go back to the room, and buried her head on the pillow. The day was getting late, Azka who was tired enough finally closed and fell asleep.
---
Kara, I'm going to Saga's house today. Like you said. Maybe I can try a little. Pray for me yes.
Azka sends a message to Kara when she is in front of Saga's house. Besides, Saga looks really happy. A smile is always on his face. He knocked again the door that was still locked. Azka who was standing next to him could only wait while occasionally glancing towards his phone. Just to get rid of the nervousness. As Azka recalls, This was the second time he was taken to the house of a man close to him. The first time was when he was close to Rasya first. Ah, Azka recalled those days. The time when Ragil didn't look at her one bit. The time when Rasha is always present and present until Azka forgets her love for Ragil, her first love. That time, as if he would continue to be so, dissolved in the love that Rasya gave. At that time, it was as if Rasya's love and attention could completely erode Azka's feelings for Ragil. That time, too, which makes Azka proud and happy can feel loved very much, not only by Rasya but also his family. But that time, too, made Azka very closed at this time. The years he spent with Rasya, turned out to be endless both. They separate. Rasya's missing. His greeting of solitude, the feeling appeared again, again wrapped it until it fell in the deepest recesses of the heart. Love that turned out to have ingrained the flesh, it never went away. Before, now, when, maybe forever.
"Let's go in" invite Saga to disperse Azka's daydream. He nodded and smiled. There was a middle-aged woman whom Azka thought was the Mother of Saga.
"Please sit down" the woman greeted Azka with great kindness. He turned his face to his son, giving an unpredictable expression. Maybe the couple's mother was asking each other answers.
"This is Azka Bu. Fellow assistants on campus" Saga finally introduces Azka.
"Azka aunty, Saga's assistant colleague on campus" Azka's birthday introduced herself while shaking Saga's mother's hand.
"Azka aja aunty, gausah use teteh. hehe" said Azka politely. "difficult to bother aunt" said Azka again.
"Saga is just for a minute, ma'am. Go to the invitation. Saga just want to take the items left behind" said Saga as he rose from his seat to a room. "Wait here yeah, just talk to Mom" Saga left Azka both.
An awkward atmosphere was inevitable. Azka immediately looked for a chat topic that she could make a topic. He asked the activities of Mother Saga, then joined to discuss some things that Azka could respond to. Mother Saga is very friendly, and nice to talk to. Until Saga has sat back in his chair, Mother Saga is still cool talking about the program at PAUD which He leads. Looks like a kid lover.
"Saga said goodbye to Mom" Saga said while kissing her mother's forehead. Azka came closer and salim.
"Azka pamit ya aunty. It's good to see aunty" Azka smiled
"Yes, come here often. Let me have a friend chat" said Mother Saga basa stale. Where his mother may not have any friends talking. It was very clear from the content of the conversation earlier that the middle-aged woman was very active. It might even be busier than the much younger Azka.
---
Azka arrived at a building that had been decorated with shades of white gold. Some people in tidy uniforms greeted them at the reception door. Azka wrote her name in the guest book and received a small card that read 'coupon souvenir'. Azka was amazed by the room she entered. Colorful flowers matching the decoration outside the building is installed to decorate every corner of the room. Azka spread her gaze around the room, looking for figures she might recognize. His gaze was fixed on the figure of the female whose hands were perfectly circular on the arms of the male whom he recognized.
Rasya? with whom
Azka was fixated, remaining in place until Saga touched her arm.
"Sister" he called slowly. Azka did not budge, slowly He followed Azka's line of sight. He guessed who was the center of Azka's attention at this time. Azka's gaze was not as usual. Saga had never seen that expression before. There was a huge sense of longing, but a sense of sadness and hurt was also present in it. That look, like describing Azka who was sad and longing at the same time.
A woman approached, her face beautiful, resembling young rising artists.
"Azza. Oi! You came?" The greeting made Azka aware, her face immediately turned happy. He gave a sweet, sincere smile as usual. The longing and sad look that he had just seen was as if he had just gone out of nowhere.
"Hai Yuk, Ayuk Dira how are you?" tanya Azka shaking hands and cipika cipiki typical of women today.
"Alhamdulillah. Thanks for coming to Irine's wedding. Irine's getting changed, let's go there. There was Laila's eyes and aunt" Dira, Rasya's cousin who was also Irine's older sister, pulled her hand away. Saga follows from behind, and Dira realizes that there is a Saga beside Azka. "Oh yeah, who is this?" ask her.
"Eh, you know Yuk, this is Saga. Azka's friend in the lecturer's assistant team at the campus" he said.
"Oh yeah? Not girlfriend?"
Uhuck-uhuk.
"Not. Ahahahah. Come on, this is all there is" said Azka terbata. He glanced at Saga who was still acting cold and calm next to him.
"Kirain kayak Rasya, there is a new trailer. Haha, don't mind him if you're not comfortable" Dira said with a laugh. "Pretend not to see" whispered Dira again as Azka showed her surprise.
"Eyang, Aunty, Azka come" said Dira cheerfully approached the family group. Hearing Azka's name being called, Rasya immediately turned around. Their views met for quite a while. Aunt Laila, Eyang and everyone else there fell silent. It was as if it was as surprised as Rasya because of Azka's arrival. Azka cleared her throat, cut off the eye contact and smiled at the other Rasya family.
"How are you doing, Eyang? Aunty? Om? Azka has not seen" said Azka base stale.
"Azka invited Irine because Azka was in Bandung all this time. We still like contact via chat loh" Dira joined the voice, diluting the tension that was felt in their families. Suddenly everyone smiled, greeting Azka kindly. From the corner of Azka's eyes, Rasya still looked at her. Sometimes he changed to look at Saga who still looked calm and spoke nothing beside Azka. Even Azka might have forgotten not to introduce Saga. Or Azka would not introduce him.
The girl beside Rasya started to get restless. He recognized Azka as the former who had the longest relationship with the man next to him. Look, even he greeted kindly all the members of the Rasya family. Naya
He loosened the circle of his hand on Rasya's arm, but had not yet detached Rasya held his hand to keep it coiled there.
Azka realized there was awkwardness between her and Rasya, as well as the woman next to her. He eventually preferred to retreat and move away in search of another more open place, saving his heart from the agonizing awkwardness.
Not even a word! Oh, how many steps have we taken away from each other? Azka.
