Owner of Heart #1
Chapter 10
Arga continued to take me up to the upper area through UNPAR (Parahyangan University), continuing to rise up past RS. Greetings until finally entering the Punclut area, I thought we were going to Lembang but Arga turned to the right, opposite the direction of Lembang until finally the motorbike entered the parking area.
“Down."
I obeyed his orders, took off my helmet and gave it to Arga. I stared around where the colorful umbrellas were mounted along the courtyard towards a Cafe. Anteng Slope, I read the name of the cafe which is now a warm conversation among young people Bandung.
“Ngapain?” I asked in a lazy tone.
“Eat,” he replied as he walked pulling my wrist like a father pulling his sniffing son.
Without protest I followed him into the cafe, which was immediately presented with a charming view. The nuances of this cafe are completely united with nature, cute transparent tents are installed with a sloping land terrazzoeling system where visitors can enjoy food such as camping with green natural scenery and cool air typical of the upper area.
“You are below or here?” Arga asked me to choose where we were going to sit, under which means inside one of the tents.
“Here only.” I chose to sit on the comfortable pads available on the balcony with the feel of the wood. We sat at the end near the guardrail, my eyes staring at the abomination of enjoying the fresh air of the mountains.
“What do you eat?”
“Serah.”
“Drink?”
“Serah.”
Arga took a breath hearing my answer that did not even take my eyes off as if he was hypnotized by nature.
“It's over.”
I stared at Arga, “What's up?”
“That's... whatever, he said it's up.”.
I smiled hearing it.
“Ya is there only.”
“Many...want which one?”
I want to smile again and start reading the food menu there.
“Both only yes?” I don't have much appetite for food.
“Can't, anyway now you have to eat.. Mother said she said you haven't eaten from yesterday.”.
“Mother pretentious, yesterday I ate kok.”
“Eat what? Eat wind?”
“Kan yesterday we ate meatballs the mustache.”
“But it is not finished, I finished.. Anyway now you have to eat, otherwise we go here, the tent already exists.”
I smiled again as I turned the menu book upside down and finally decided on the choice of fried rice and tutifrutti yoghurt. Arga ordered only avocado juice. Cheating!
I went back into silence while enjoying the view, Arga was the same. He didn't ask me much even though I knew so much he wanted to say all along and just waited for the right time, and now might be the time.
“No news yet?” Arga started asking questions that made me take a heavy breath and then shook my weak head.
“He's again a State duty, Key.”
“Iya.”
“So, it could be in the forest that there is no signal or can not hold hp for fear of going to digagalin their mission.”
“Iya, I'm just worried afraid there's nothing on him.”
“God willing, they are fine.”
“Aamiin.”
“If there is a problem there, our government will not stay silent and must have been in the news on TV.”
I nodded in agreement, along with that the waiter came to bring us our order.
“Now eat a lot, ugly know skinny it.”
“Slim instead of skinny.”
“Kurus rich board.”
I pouted hearing it, making Arga smile.
“Peat meal.”
“Cheat, you yourself do not eat.”
“Udah earlier ma Vienna.”
“Dating just keep.”
“Hahaha.. hence nyari girlfriend who is desperate not LDR-an, heavy on the cost, heavy on the pulse, heavy on the quota, want to meet hard, video call-an even added kangen want to bend, keep finally curled hp, ah perdangan.”
“Iya dech yes whose boyfriend deket.” I bribed a spoonful of fried rice lazily.
“So you guys are officially dating? He never really?”
Arga asked casually as he lit his cigarette, making me take a breath and look at him sharply.
“Cold, hehehe... This one alone, promise,” he said while grinning because I know I don't like to see him smoke, “So he never did?” he asked me the one answered from me.
“Never real?” Arga made sure my answer made me look at him for a while then nodded while answering.
“Iya, never.”
“So what have you been all this time? Relationships without status?”
“Don't know too.” I sound desperate.
“Key, I have often said, statements or incarnations are not just words that have no meaning. It can be a handle for a relationship, we all need certainty... does he really love us or not? What do we mean to him? If like this you do not have any rights over him, and vice versa, you also can not be angry if he just disappeared like now.”
“Know, but...” I lost my words.
“But?”
“Did he never express his feelings? So how do you know if he likes and loves you? Kan y'all far away so can not seem also from his actions.”
“Yaaah... of us chating every night, I mean if he really does not like why he desperately contact me every night? And he also often says that he misses me.”
I saw Arga breathing heavily, and I could tell that he was holding back anger.
“So, all this time he never said like or love you, but he often said that he misses?”
I nodded while stirring up the fried rice that I did not eat.
“But there's nothing wrong with that right, Ga?”
“No, of course not... continue you also like to say that you miss him?”
I nodded in shame.
“You ever said that you love him?”
“That's it, Ga, it's supposed to be the first guy who says girl time first who says.”
Arga nodded with a smile, “Good, however much you like her, you must maintain your pride as a woman not to be considered a slap..
I smiled as I went back to eating my fried rice until there was a quarter left but my stomach was already too full.
“Kok not finished?”
“Kenyang.”
“Pamali know eat not finished.”
“You're the one who finished.”
Arga clucked while taking my fried rice and started to finish it off.
“So why angry?” I asked as I looked at Arga who finished the fried rice in two mouthfuls.
“When?”Arga asked while drinking my water.
“Tadi, fitting I said he likes to say kangen but never say dear.”
“Nothing, just my mind and it could be wrong.”
“Emang what?”
Arga was silent for a while, he smoked his cigarette then exhaled his smoke to the side so as not to hit me.
“Cowok who can say kangen but he can not say that there are two dear, the first is he is too embarrassed or afraid to express his affection which means he is a coward… secondly he just wants to make a woman bend her knees in front of him without having to feel tied down and he is ********.”
“He is not..”
Arga raised his hand telling me to shut up first.
“There is a third possibility, which is the type of person who thinks that affection is not necessary with words but enough with action, as you said earlier.”
I nodded in agreement because I thought the Lieutenant was in that category.
“But... if he can say he misses you why can't he say he loves you?”
I was silent and couldn't answer Arga's question, which looked at me with concern.
“The taste of kangen is part of dear, Key, if it is too bad it will be kangen if you do not meet. Conversely, if you feel kangen means you love him.”
“But it could be that he does not yet know his true feelings, so he is still hesitant to reveal his feelings.”
“If he still doubts his feelings he will not say kangen very easily, he will think first why he can miss you, he said, that's when he'll realize that he loves you, so if he can already express that he misses you, then he already knows with his own feelings.”
“Means she loves me?”
Arga shrugged his shoulders, “As I said earlier, the choice is two.. coward or ********. If he were a man, he would say I love you, because he doesn't want to lose you and he just wants you to be his, not hanging you without an unclear status as if he does not want to be tied to you and can freely switch to other women without having to say the word break up first.”
“He is not a coward much less *******.” Of course I defended the Lieutenant, because I'm sure he wasn't one of the two options Arga mentioned earlier. Arga now looked at me as if reading my mind before finally nodding in understanding.
“You trust her?”
“Iya, I trust.”
Arga nodded again, “Yes already, then I will trust your choice and support you. Maybe he was waiting for the right opportunity to express his feelings, maybe he wanted to say it immediately when he came home later.”
For the first time in months I was able to smile sincerely, as if Arga had re-injected my confidence.
“Yes yes, Ga, maybe he wants to talk directly.”
“Yes, so if you believe in him, do not despair rich gini ah, ugly know.”
“Not broken hope just worry aja.”
“He knows and it's natural, but you trust him if now he's doing his job and he's okay, don't even worry you become a burden for him. Sure enough, someday if his job is done he will call you again.”
“Yes yes, Ga.”
“Iya.. now drink the yogurt do not stir mulu kasian dizzy later yogurt.”
“Hehehe... but, if it turns out he has returned to Indonesia but does not contact me again how?”
“Means he is not the best for you, sure God will love the best for you, because God pity look at you, already ugly, peot (thin), single again.”
“Hahaha..
“Hahahaha.. May I give you a suggestion no, Key?”
“What?”
“Just like food or medicine or whatever it is, I hope your wait has a time limit as well.”
I looked at Arga while raising confused eyebrows.
“I mean as you said earlier if for example after he returned to Indonesia but it turns out he did not contact you as well, I hope that will be the end of your waiting. I hope you'll open your heart to another man who will love you so much. You deserve to be happy, Key. And rest assured there will be a man who will make you happy and love you besides him. ”
I was silent and then nodded in understanding even though in my heart I prayed that the man who would make me happy and love me was the Lieutenant. But what Arga said was true, I would wait for him until he returned to Indonesia, and if he did not contact me then that would be the end of my wait. Though it's hard I have to continue my life without the Lieutenant in it.
****
