Mahabbah Love Khalisa

108

"Wait waiting." Call Levin when Rindang is about to leave the room after handing out the hijab to a female community member. After arguing with himself, Levin finally had to dare to express his feelings to Rindang. Whatever Rindang answers, Levin will take it. This isn't the first time Levin's been rejected. Hold still. Yes, Levin is not at all optimistic about Rindang's answer.

"Why Ko?" Rindang stopped his steps, he played his car keys in his left hand waiting for Levin's sentence impatiently because Khalisa's car was not visible on the page.

"Can I say something to you?" Levin was trying to control the rumble inside his chest.

"May, why wear it all like anyone."

"I have good intentions, if you want—I can come to see your parents in Banyuwangi and propose to you."

Shady widened, the car key in his hand was thrown quite far away. Crazy, kesambet where's this guy? The next second Rindang laughed until he let out tears.

"Rindang, I'm serious." Levin was confused to see Rindang actually laugh after hearing the sentence that he considered sacred. Rindang did not know how difficult it was to gather mentally to say the short sentence. "You told me that you wished I had found a woman who was as good as Khalisa and now I've found her."

Rindang stunned by the sentence Levin, he was far behind when compared to Khalisa who had memorized 30 juz and hundreds of hadith.

Shady stepped back to pick up the keys to his car lying miserably on the floor.

"Why did Ko Levin suddenly invite me to marry, what dream did he have?"

"It's not that sudden, I wanted to talk about this a long time ago but only now have the courage."

"Since when?"

"Since we met at the Al-Bayan Museum."

"Khalisa know?" Rindang thought maybe Levin said this to Khalisa first.

Levin shook his head, he was not sure about Khalisa because they had never discussed this matter. Levin only slightly touched on Rindang some time ago. Levin never told his feelings about Rindang openly. But maybe Khalisa had realized it before Levin came out.

"Rindang, don't assume I'm a person who easily switch hearts—not."

"I don't believe in love because even if I used to date, I don't love them." Shady honest to his feelings, although he had a long relationship with Jason, he could not call it love. Rindang only felt comfortable because Jason treated him well.

Rindang rubbed the water in the corner of his eyes, "i don't think marriage let alone marriage with Ko Levin—not because Koko did not meet the standard— at all 'not precisely Ko Levin is perfect to be a husband, not because Koko did not meet the standard at all, already handsome, good and soon to be a doctor but—"

"Is it because of your pain?"

Shindang nodded, "one of them and now it feels like I don't need anything, my heart is filled with the same love of God."

"But marriage is also worship."

Rindang was silent, right also Levin's speech. Marriage is the longest worship. Then can she be a wife like Khalisa? She is comfortable enough with her life now. He enjoyed every moment he spent including his solitude in the apartment. Rindang can prostrate, dhikr and tilawah according to his will. Rindang can also make clothes while listening to the murottal of the Qur'an. It felt like Rindang did not need anything more in his life.

Behind the boundaries that cannot be broken including food, he felt things became easier. Since suffering from type 1 diabetes, Rindang can no longer eat anything he wants. After embracing Islam, the type of food that can be shady consumption is also getting less. But Rindang was grateful because he did not need to make various types of cuisine.

"You don't have to answer now."

"okay." Rindang mangut-mangut, he himself confused to give an answer like what to Levin. If Rindang used to be able to change his girlfriend so easily, now he is not in love with anyone. Again, his heart was filled with the love of God. "I'll go home first." Pamphitt.

"Be careful." Levin saw Rindang's departure with mixed feelings. At least Levin still has hope to be accepted Rindang. He can only surrender to God, at least he has tried to express his feelings to Rindang.

Rindang stepped on the gas leaving the courtyard, his destination now being Khalisa's home. If he used to be approached by guys and then easily establish a relationship, now he is not a shady like that anymore. Dating and marriage are two things that are much different until Rindang is confused. According to Rindang marriage is something complicated and he is not ready to commit to anyone.

Levin was about to lock the door when someone called out to him from behind. Levin turned around to find a guy as tall as he was, like he knew that guy.

"You?" Levin pointed at the guy.

"Coko knows me?" Jason pointed to himself. It seems they have met before.

"Who is it?" Levin tried to remember that face.

"I've sent an email to the Mualaf Community but I haven't got an answer so I'm here to go."

"Oh you're Rindang's ex-girlfriend, right." Finally Levin remembered, "sorry our old email is in trouble, I have not listed our new email while trying to fix the old email, you do not need to call Koko like we are the same age."

Jason nodded.

"You're here to see" Levin didn't want to guess, but what purpose would Jason send an email to the Nausea Community if not to be a part of them.

"Yes." Yeah."

Levin turned his back on disbelief, would Jason embrace Islam?

"Let's go in." Levin stopped locking the door, he invited Jason in and contacted their guidance counselor to help Jason shahadah.

"May I ask why you want to embrace Islam?" Levin asked Jason to sit down with him.

"Fall in love." Jason looked down at the red carpet he was sitting on.

"Fell in love?" Rework Levin.

"I fell in love with God who made Rindang look so closed, no one else can see it, I'm amazed because Islam really protects its people, especially women."

Levin was stunned to hear Jason's words. The reasons for a person to embrace Islam are diverse but always succeed in making Levin amazed.

"When Rindang said he wanted to convert to Islam and cut our relationship."

Suddenly the smile on Levin's face disappeared knowing the implied meaning of Jason's sentence. Jason wants to reunite with Rindang. Levin thought about his own fate because Rindang had not answered his feelings. What if Rindang rejects Levin after finding out Jason converted.

"You still love Rindang?" Ask Levin carefully.

"Pardon me if I say not because although dating some girls after breaking up from Rindang, I can not forget Rindang."

"But Rindang may not want to date you again."

"If I had a chance, I would have married her."

Levin gasped whether he was destined to become a man whose love could never be realized. From the beginning of the story, Levin's parents did not like him. But for Levin he has the right to determine his own life partner.

"What about your parents?"

"Mama and Papa really like Rindang, when I know I broke up with Rindang they even look sadder than me, Rindang and Mama's relationship is also good because Rindang used to visit the house often."

Levin smiled bitterly, he even just started to step up but had to step back. Could he drive Jason out of here so that the guy can shahada elsewhere. No, it's impossible. If Levin did that then he got a big sin because it means he delayed the time Jason who should have been martyred but he deliberately stalling it.

That afternoon the echoes of the shahadah were again heard in the meeting room which also witnessed hundreds of people reciting the two sentences of the previous shahadah.

Jason was like being reborn as a new human being, he did not expect if the shahada had such a powerful force. Jason's body trembled as he spoke the sentence even though his tongue could not be as fluent as the ustadz guiding him. But Ustadz said it didn't matter even he said Jason had started well.

Before he was determined to embrace Islam, Jason had to find out the basic things about Islam and of course he still had to learn a lot. After finding out about the community, Jason immediately decided to send an email because he believed the people who were here would guide him. Moreover, Rindang also joined in this community.

******

Khalisa took out his small suitcase, Azfan and himself will go to Bantul next Sunday to hold a 7-month study. They had planned to hold the study at home as at 4 months. But Kirana asked them to do it in Bantul as well as introducing Khalisa to the family of Azfan's father.

"Rest for a while, aren't you tired?" Azfan approached Khalisa who was removing some clothes from the closet. "It's still next Sunday to go."

"If postponed fear even males Mas." Khalisa also folded 5 pieces of hijab and put them in a suitcase. "Mas Azfan who's going to bring you that shirt?"

"Bawa sarong because at home there are still some clothes I, later can pinjem have Mas Adi as well."

"Oh yes Mas, I have to transfer money to Kak Luthfi." Khalisa just remembered if he had to transfer HAWASI cash funds to Luthfi for the preparation of the faculty-level MTQ competition organized by the campus Da'wah Institution. Before Khalisa asked for help, Azfan first took Khalisa's phone on the nightstand. "Thank You."

"We just need consumption funds, right?" Azfan saw Khalisa's thumb move agilely over the flat screen of his phone.

"Yes, FIAI's son who's going with Mas?"

"It looks like Mahira has already signed up for the race, she is quite confident performing in front of a lot of people."

"It's a pity that Azfan can't come." Khalisa put his phone down after transferring money for the needs of the race to Luthfi.

Khalisa's phone ringtones distract them. Rindang's name was plastered on the screen of the phone, with a movement once swiped Khalisa answered the phone from Rindang.

"Khalisa, are you home yet?"

"Just been there."

"At least busy?"

"Not too much anyway, just packing clothes to Bantul tomorrow, just be done again."

"Can I go there?"

"Have it, you're all right?"

"I've gone there." Connection interrupted.

Khalisa lowers his phone from the ear, he checks a message from Luthfi who has confirmed the funds went into his account.

Khalisa's eyes widened when he accidentally saw the WhatsApp Story of the Mualaf Community at the top which means the story has just been created.

A video of someone reciting a shahada guided by ustadz. Khalisa almost dropped his phone because he did not believe what he saw.

"Why Haura?" Azfan sat next to Khalisa.

"It's Jason, right?" Khalisa showed the video to Azfan.

Azfan focused his gaze on Khalisa's phone screen. The man's greenish hair color makes Khalisa sure that he is Jason.

"Jason creed?" Azfan also did not believe in what he saw. "Didn't that just shady story that Jason wanted to embrace Islam?"

"Yes but I didn't expect it this fast, and this is Jason with Ustadz Malik, there's Ko Levin too."

"Thank God, our brother is growing again." Azfan was happy if Jason followed in Rindang's footsteps to become a convert.

"Aah!" Khalisa complained to grip Azfan's thigh when he felt a fairly tight movement in his stomach.

"Why baby?" Azfan panicked to see Khalisa grimacing in pain until his face turned red.

"God willing, again do this son of Umma inside, very fond of his rendition." Khalisa smiled widely even though his eyes were wet due to the movements of his fetus just now.

Azfan rubbed Khalisa's stomach gently and calmed him down, "let's just move up, like he doesn't like Haura sitting down." He helped Khalisa move to the bed. "Let me continue packing his clothes."

"It's okay, Mom, I still want to pick another dress."

They heard the bell ringing several times. Azfan immediately went down to the first floor of the shophouse to open the door.

"Where's khalisa?" Rindang immediately hunted when the door opened, it seemed he could not wait to tell about Levin who expressed feelings for him.

"There's a room."

"Can I go there?" Rindang asked impatiently, if he used to be able to enter arbitrarily to the apartment Khalisa dying no longer. Rindang had to ask Azfan for permission.

"Can."

Rindang barged in half running up the stairs to Khalisa's room whose door was open.

"Rindang, you have to see this." Khalisa thrust his phone to see Rindang coming.

"Just now, what I want to take is much more important." Rindang pushed Khalisa's hand and sat cross-legged on the carpet joining Khalisa.

"It's important too."

"Shhhhh!" Rindang smothered Khalisa's mouth with his hands. "You know what, Ko Levin said he wanted to marry me?"

Khalisa mendelik showed his brownish-colored bead.

"What do you need to answer?"

"Yes I said I haven't thought about getting married, I'm still comfortable with my current situation and to make a serious commitment I'm not ready."

"Think again, ask God for guidance because He is the best determinant, He also moved Ko Levin's heart to say this to you."

Shindang shook his head, "i'm not ready, I can't."

"Don't precede God's destiny."

"Now I ask, after marriage the next step must be to have children, right, if I told my husband later that I didn't want to have a child, would he accept that if he could just as well, I'd be a selfish wife."

Khalisa grasped Rindang's hand, "but there's no way you're alone, if you talk slowly, surely Ko Levin will also understand."

"I don't want to hurt anyone, let alone Ko Levin, he's a good guy and deserves more than me."

"You're perfect, you're on par with Ko Levin."

"Except my sickness."

"Rindang, you can't say that." Khalisa hit the back of Rindang's hand slowly. "You definitely need a companion and Ko Levin is the right person for you."

Rindang let out a heavy sigh, he was unsure of Khalisa's sentence.

"So what are you talking about?"

Khalisa took off his grip on Rindang's hand and picked up the phone he had placed on his shirt.

"Ready to be shocked." Khalisa gave his phone to Rindang.

Rindang's reaction was not much different from Khalisa even unconsciously opened his mouth while watching a video of Jason who was saying the word shahadah. A sacred sentence that also changed the whole life of Rindang.

Rindang thought Jason was just messing with what he said at the Mall. Jason really proved it.

******

Arriving at the apartment Rindang made a video call with his parents through a laptop. Rindang talks about Levin who has good intentions towards him. Of course they were surprised because Rindang had never told me that he was close to Levin.

"Mama and Papa don't want to curb you let alone later who will marry you and Levin, so the most important thing is your feelings, do you love him?" Papa Rindang's face was serious, he allowed the minus glasses perched on his high nose.

Rindang shook his head, "Rindang doesn't know, Pa."

"Don't you have no plans to get married yet?" Mama Rindang chimed.

"Yes Ma and Ko Levin also give me time to think but I can't make him wait too long."

"You said Levin's still an internship now and soon your college is also in its final year, marriage is not just about love proof that Khalisa and her husband had to move around to study independently and not just rely on parents, according to Mama the decision to get married must be thought out carefully, it can't be like this."

Rindang was silent digesting every word his mother said.

"Finish your college first, if Levin wants to wait then you can get married if you don't, he can marry another woman." Papa Rindang's.

Rindang smiled faintly and nodded, thanking him because after hearing the opinion of his parents, Rindang felt very relieved. Currently, Rindang just wants to finish his studies. If married then Rindang must share his thoughts and he is not necessarily able to do that.

After disconnecting the phone with his parents, Rindang immediately sent a message to Levin. Rindang did not want to make Levin wait too long.

Ko Levin, after thinking about it for now I can't accept Koko's good intentions.

Rindang pressed the paper airplane icon to send the message. Rindang does not want to make the answer gray, he must give certainty to Levin. He also could not have asked Levin to wait when he did not have faith.

I will try again one day with a better me.

Shindang was surprised to read Levin's reply, he touched his rumbling chest. The phone in Rindang's hand came off, he threw his body onto the bed and looked at the ceiling of his room. Rindang thought Levin would just give up after getting a reply from him.