Love (Not) Owned

Thesis Session

Time passed without feeling the health of the mother is also much better I also calmly completed my studies and soon will be a thesis hearing.

Since I was sick there were no days without calling Mom, not even infrequently we video call in the family group.

Until my thesis hearing arrived I was nervous, considering that this was a test that I went through on my own without being accompanied by my family or friends.

After dawn I also made a video call with my mother asking for her prayers so that everything went smoothly. Not to forget I also asked Abah prayer so that he always prayed for me.

What I myself know without me asking parents will always pray for their children but for me to say it directly is the best sungkem even in a long distance.

At 06:00 I was ready to go to campus because the thesis hearing will be held at 07:30.

All the prayers I said while waiting for my turn to enter the room. Don't forget I sent a message via a family group chat asking for prayers.

Until it was my turn to come in.

For about an hour I was in the courtroom and came out with a cumlaude pass.

Grateful for sure because everything I do gets results that match my hard work.

During the trial I accidentally turned off my HP notification and after I came out I checked the green app.

Lots of phone calls from my brother, just call him back.

"Assalamualaikum laila, I'm sorry notif I matiin.." Suddenly Laila cried as much as I wondered.

"What's wrong with crying ?"

"Sir, I was rushed to the hospital again and it was right on the way to the hospital mom nanyakin you continue, you go home now yes deck"

"Yes, I'm going home right now"

For whatever reason, my heart is broken when I hear this news. Even though today is the day that was waiting for by my mother, even Mom once said she would come to Jakarta to see me graduation once again but now she has to be rushed to the hospital again.

After receiving the news, I immediately returned to the index to pack up and headed straight to the airport.

In the plane my tears never stopped falling, how not, all the hopes he had fulfilled. Just one wish I could not fulfill.

________

The Hospital

"Mom, mother" I embraced the woman who had always been my role model who lay weak.

"You're up to my son"

"Yes bu Shofie until, Shofie came home, Shofie passed the bu with a satisfactory grade. I'm happy, aren't you ?"

"Alhamdulillah I'm proud of you son, you must be tired right, you eat, surely you have not eaten, right ?"

"Shofie's not hungry yet ma'am"

"Son, it's true your mother said you just eat first so Abah who accompanies here, your brother's sister is also eating in the Hospital cafeteria, go not until you get sick too"

"Well Bah soon Shofie will eat, but Shofie wants to be here soon with Mom"

_________

In the canteen of the Hospital I also met my three brothers. As soon as I saw my sister Laila immediately hugged me as if strengthening me.

"You are strong, there we are here do not be weak pity Mother" said Laila hugging me

"I'm afraid sister, I'm afraid I haven't been happy Mom, I have a wish I can't fulfill"

"Sit down and calm yourself"

Brother Nadrah gave me a glass of warm water and then I sipped slowly. The burden has not diminished.

My mother's last wish was to see me married but until this moment there was also no one who could make me look for a replacement for Malik.

Malik may already have no feelings for me so what else do I wish for him.

"do I have to ask Hendra to marry me so that Mother's wishes are fulfilled, but I cannot accept Him as my husband even though He is willing, she said, if this is the only way I have to take why I have to linger, I have to sacrifice for Mother" my inner self

"Shofie, hey I'm dreaming" Nadrah woke me up from the daydream.

"no really" I took a deep breath "I want to fulfill Mom's last wish, sister"

"What is Shof "

"Married" I said steadily

"You sure, with whom ? search for Zahra

"Later you also know, the most important thing today is the happiness of Mother"

"Dek, if you are not yet steady and sure of your advice do not first, we know your intention to rejoice Mom, but if later it will make you uncomfortable in your relationship later better not deck. Marry because you are confident, comfortable and love each other without having to force" advised sister Laila

I don't know if I'm confused but on the other hand I feel that mom's time is not much more, I want to see Mom happy in her days ahead.

If indeed marrying Hendra is the way then I must immediately tell her to come here.

"Yuk we turned Abah's own kasian in the room" said Brother Nadrah

________

All three of my brothers returned home and so did Abah. I'm staying here tonight.

A lot of what Mother told me about her conceiving four daughters, giving birth to them, our childhood even when releasing to my three married sisters all seemed to pull her back to those times.

"Mom, it's tonight, we sleep yuk" I asked

"Yes, I'm glad you got Mom here"

________

Early in the morning I woke up and said I wanted to eat chicken porridge. All right for that I immediately went out to look for him because in the Hospital there is no.

"Mom, Shofie come out first yeah find the porridge, if you want something Mom press this button later nuns will come"

"yes, not for long"

"get my mother"

_________

After feeding Mother breakfast chicken porridge We also told a lot, Mother was enthusiastic when I told her how the process of serving yesterday until the news of the mother was rushed to the Hospital again.

"Sorry Mom for you to worry, I also do not know why suddenly Mother's disease recur again." Mom took my hand and held mine.

"no papa ma'am, don't mind a lot dong bu, he said want to see me graduation right"

"Yes later we will all go to Jakarta for your graduation later"

tok tok tok tok

"Dahliaaaaa" shouted Bu Susi as she entered the nursery of the mother in the aftercare with her husband

"It's getting better soon yes you're really happy here" sedu Bu Susi

"Seneng is not good for yes sus"

"How's Miss Dahlia doing ?" ask Mr. Herman

"Alhamdulillah like this is healthy so the name is also old yes kann"

"I don't see Mr. Rashid, Where He is "

"I am here Her" Abah opened the entrance with a tent with Mother's favorite fruit

"well, where has this Rashid sir been seen from ?"

"Recently arrived, coincidentally who stayed here Shofie me and the other children went home alternately"

"So Shofie's alone taking care of you, Dahlia ? well, Shofie Nak is great you are always there for your mother when you are again in Jakarta right, lucky you have a child like him, not all children are ready immediately with the condition of his parents"

I left these four people in the room while I went outside to get some fresh air.

"what am I calling Hendra right now for I mean this "

I'll find Hendra's contact to speak directly