FRIGID GIRL VS OBSESSED GIRL

SELF

POV INA

Long enough for me, staring at the screen of my phone I did not think about what I read and I saw from Aldo's message. I can only chuckle Lightly inexhaustible with the child's behavior I try to ignore because I am afraid, many times that crowded my brain even though to ignore the message.

“I'm not in the mood to joke right now. “whisper me.

“Ina..”call mas Feri standing at the door, I heaved a heavy sigh and reluctantly turned my head. He approached and said.

“Pardon me, for that attitude. Come down mas already cooked fried rice.”ujarnya. I did not budge and also did not turn to him. But the question mark that shrouded my soul I could not keep silent.

“Mas, what else are you really up to, staying at this house? What do you want? I'll cover your wife's needs, as long as you leave. I'm tormented mas. I can't keep going like this. Please understand me.”ujarkuu spoke with a sigh, mas Feri snorted and said,

“You're really okay without mas?”he said for a moment I looked into his eyes. But he said again.

 

“You really missed all that love?”he said, I knit my eyebrows and was very confused by the question. My reflex closed my ears and said with a whimpering cry,

 

“You, by the way what the hell mas. It's nice that you talk about love but you are alone.”my words stopped I swallowed the cry while muttering.

“You came, another woman with that love you said. While here I don't want to share it, I don't want to share my love that's it. But you've ruined everything.”rintiihku, mas Feri tried to hold my shoulder I'm annoyed moving my shoulder does not want to be touched.

“Ina.. mas Gak can see you like this, please darling, do not cry anymore.”luirihnya I'm getting shocked and completely do not understand the way of his mind.

“Why do you keep me quiet mas? Just cover your ears.”rintihku crumbs in the mattress while my eyes pusar with tears gushing, mas Feri just choose silence.

Two hours later, I was able to calm down with the pain, suddenly the sound of the bell echoed along with the woman's voice, I slightly nodded and saw Feri sleeping on the couch, I choose to ignore it as if I don't hear it.

“Mas, mas Ferries?”he shouted loudly, I tried to clench my fingers annoyed at the screams, until Feri woke up and rushed down, I shuffled to walk to the balcony to see them on the terrace.

“Mas, I was waiting for you from afternoon, why don't you come. You don't habit of kek gini donk mas, I also need you.”rengeknya. seen mas Feri holding something in Rara's hands, until it looks like the woman whispered, and beronta until mas Feri suddenly. Smells her lips and the woman is calm, I sigh in line with the footsteps of my tears again and again raining, slowly I retreat and do not want to see it, any further.

 

The next morning, I woke up with a letter on the sofa. Although I know, I didn't sleep when Feri left last night.

“Ina, I'm sorry mas, I have to go to Rara.”liya, I squeeze. Tremble the paper and bring it to the wall.

“It hurts too much mas, I can't,”lirihku, this time I don't want to shed tears again. I hate. I wouldn't expect Mas Feri to come back again.  My home. He has no right to me. I am really depressed. I thought I wanted to consult a psychiatrist first, I even thought about ending my life or killing Rara and Feri, I can't be like this, Mama Rania loves her daughter very much, he's sacrificed enough of his possessions just for my recovery, and I don't want to be weak now just because I'm stressed Feri's remarried.

Tuuu…

I tried to contact Bagas, my doctor and my trust psychologist did not take long he raised.

“Ya Hello Ina?”

“Bagas? You're in the clinic. I want my consul.”ujarku

“Yes my whole day at the clinic, what's up Ina? Is Rara back?’tanyanya, I grimaced and said..

“Means?’

“I want a consultation.”short me.

“Oh, that's it. I'm at the clinic. Now free because later in the afternoon I will be out of town.’’timpalnya.

“Alright I'll come,”ujarku.

 

Once there I was immediately greeted and welcomed in by him.

“I was a little surprised because earlier, you said. You are consulting.”ucapnnnya Bagas, when we were in the room therapy Bagas, I sighed heavily and said stammering.

“I can't stop crying, my chest hurts. I even want to end my own life, sometimes terbesit want to kill mas Feri and Rara.”ucapku heavy again depressed. For a moment Bagas looked at my face and asked.

“What is the reason you are like this? Aren't you and Rara okay? I know very well you care about him.”he said, I sniff and regulate my breath.

“They're really married”my cap is heavy. Seen Bagas sighed and mangosteen.

“Oh so, I think it's normal. Because it's natural that if you behave like this, it's nothing to be afraid of actually.’ucap Bagas, I frown my forehead with tears drooling.

“for his faith, I felt pain and tightness in my chest, even I could not comfort myself. I even really want to die, just I think about Mama Rania, so I did not do that, that I was tempted to kill Feri and Rara. Is that reasonable?”I asked as I rubbed my face with tears pouring out,

“That's all natural, because indeed you have never felt pain before,”ucap Bagas, I fell silent and saw the face of the bagas inside.

“Yes, in the last few years you have been very pampered by your husband, as well as Mama Rania. They take care of your heart so that you do not know what is called pain, until the pain comes, as if you can not accept.”ujar Bagas, I gasped and tried to shake my lips.

“Kalo so I don't want to be normal, I want to go back to the way I used to be, where everyone is, thinking about my feelings.”My conversation moaned, Bagas, try to say something else that might calm me down a little,

“Normal, not a possibility to be happy but normal it is a waste to live life.”tujarnyu I dim.

“If you can and can deal with this all means you are ready with the normal life, there will be many new things or experiences that you can pick up hikmahnya”.

“How, should I take care of this? ‘’my words with teary eyes.

“there's a lot of advice actually, but for Ina. I can emphasize. Just love yourself, when you yourself do not want you to be destroyed, you will not waver just because of heart problems.”be clear, my heart drifted and re-spread tears.

“Tt-thank you bagas.”lirihku wiped the tears and let out a long sigh while exhaling it

“Starting today, I don't want to love anything, other than myself.”ucapku with steady. Bagas smiled as he gave his thumb.

“Mantep..’’hut her smile brightened, a little my heart was relieved, I drove away the pain that was so bothersome in my soul. I don't want that pain to rule my entire life, there's someone who really wants my smile and my life, which is my mom, she can adopt a normal child but she chose me, I can't be selfish, I have to stand up for my mom. I smiled back and said.

“I'll love mom and myself.”whisper me, move, move,

“I go first bagas, thank you?”he smiled and nodded and let me go.