Waiting for the Light to Return
Chapter 6 - A New Door for the Goddess
“Wi... Wi... S... Stop first, yuk... Hhh... Hhh..”.
I stopped the bike and looked back. Laugh as Nadiena approaches slowly.
Gasps, he said.
“Gi... Maddened... Quick... Once you... Hhh... Hhh..”.
I shake my head to see it.
“Nadien, Nadien. Sitting behind a desk for too long. Out of shape ‘kan. The weakness is stacked.”
Nadien took a sip of the energy drink and set his breath before answering me.
“Yes, severe. Just this way it's been snatched. Though we often get to Dago, yes?”
I took a sip of my bottle juice and nodded.
“Ke Dago, to Padalarang instead, Dien. Now just get to Jalan Menado already shaking his legs huh?”
Nadien laughing.
“Basic. Different ones that keep fit. What secret, Wi?”
I shrugged my shoulders.
“The secret is yoga every weekend, Dien. And reduce the consumption feeding from foundation.”
Nadien laughed out loud.
I laughed before I asked.
“So? Continue up to Gasibu or want to call it in, Dien?”
Nadien nodded and gave up.
“Call it in deh, Wi. It's crazy if I force it to Gasibu. If I can't gowes anymore do you want bonceng?”
I laugh.
“If I can't get overtime money no, Dien? If I can I want to deh.”
Nadien hit my arm.
“Crazy! Crazy matre! Already ah, find a coffee shop yuk. I'm straightening my legs.”
Fortunately, our place stopped not far from a simple coffee shop for bikers like us.
After parking the bike, Nadien immediately walked towards the cashier.
“Wi, what do you want to order? Latte?”
I thought for a moment and shook my head.
“I’ pass deh, Dien. I still have juice. Titip croissant or sandwich only yes.”
Nadien nodded and ordered, while I chose to sit at a table in the outer courtyard.
Putting the helmet on the side, I checked the sports app on my phone.
Hm, not bad. 300 calories have been burned from my body cells. For the cycling for fun category, this is already amazing.
Satisfied with my achievements today, I opened Whatsapp and found that the Student Affairs Crewmates group was full of Cindy-themed messages that had to create a Parent’s Day vlog example this weekend.
Cindy English's
Duh weekend it should be mall dong, Ma’am Wi. Why Monday, for example? ‘Kan event is also next month. 10.05
Indri Bio's
Shht, noisy Cin. Ma’am Dewi is also cycling. Who do you want to mall anyway? Mr Sardhana PJOK huh? Ahhaha 10.07
Cindy English's
Offhanded! I'm single but there's still self-esteem, yeah! Cook like a widower like Mr. Sardhana! 10.08
Josh IT
Widower ‘kan much experience, Cin. Later taught many positions, Cin. 10.08
Cindy English's
Noisy, Josh! Crazy one! I throw it to the Sea ah, if her future husband porn*!* 10.09
Josh IT
What position, really? Yoga position means, Cin. Let slim know a little. 1010
I chuckled at the slanted messages from my men.
Me
Shh, already focus on each job! Cin, Monday I'll buy you a J.Co doughnut, pay overtime weekend, OK? 1010
Cindy English's
Yay! Same gelato too yes, Ma’am! 1010
Me
Ready, I'll ask Mr. Sardhana to send it directly to your boarding house, huh? 10.11
Josh IT
Wkwkwkwkwk, nice one, Ma’am! 10.11
Cindy English's
Ma’am Dewiiii (emoji crying) 10.11
“Let's see what you are? How about a smile yourself, Wi?”
Nadien sat down and thrust a plate of sandwiches in front of me.
I showed him the chats in the Student Affairs group.
“This, Dien. Sa Children. Crazy all.”
Nadien reads the group while sipping his caffe latte and laughs.
“Assyik ya, have guys like them it.”
I'm nodding.
“Banget. I am grateful to be working in SA with them. I can't imagine having to work with Arianto or Rianne from the Curriculum. So boring.”
Nadien.
“So I didn't put it wrong, Wi? It was Mr. The king proposed you to be the curriculum. Said math teacher ‘kan is usually systematic. He does not know if you used to make a thesis called one week, yes.”
I chuckle.
“What's the thrill of play by the rules, Dien? Don't be too serious, live it.”
Nadien took another sip of his caffe latte and looked at me deeply.
“Wi, I haven't talked to you in a long time. How are you, Wi? Are you okay?”
I let the question hang while cutting the sandwich.
Nadien of course knows what happened to me.
He's been with me from the first time Tia's been in the hospital.
He also knew what happened to my family after Tia was called by God.
So I don't have to pretend I don't know what the question means.
Breathing out, I tried to smile.
“I'm fine, Dien.”
Nadien put down the cup and leaned his body closer.
“You are a lot of things, Wi. But you are not a wild.”
My fragile smile turned into an ironic laughter.
“Well, to tell you the truth, I am not okay, Dien. But you already know that, ‘kan?”
Nadien was silent for a moment, then asked quietly.
“So no news from Windra?”
I shrugged my shoulders without hesitation.
“Abviously still. But the news is not important. Chat and phone just ask the news. Without telling him where and what he is doing.”
Nadien stroked my hand gently.
“Propay yes, Wi.”
Still indifferent, I started eating my order sandwiches.
“I’ve told you, I’m okay, Dien. Its alright. I also stopped wishing for him to come back. Have met another woman maybe. Women who..”.
I'm stalled.
All the things I thought, felt, and experienced I always shared with Nadien.
Except for the horrible fact that it was probably me who passed down the genetic disease to Tia and Windra leaving me because of it.
Turning my brain, I connected sentences quickly.
“Women are better than me.”
Nadien turned the eyeball in disbelief.
“C’mon, Wi. Which woman is better than you? What other woman could stand to sacrifice in all things for her husband? Which other woman can stand to face everything you experience alone without ever complaining once? Which woman can be like you?”
I laugh.
“Ciye, mature, Dien. Ask to be treated yes?”
Nadien did not laugh.
“Wi, I'm serious. I haven't had an intense conversation with you in a long time, but I know that you sleep less every day. I meani... You're beautiful, you're successful, you're amazing. Why do you torture yourself for the sake of such an irresponsible husband?”
...
This again.
I did not answer, focusing on the food in front.
Nadien watched me for a while, then sighed deeply.
“At least you're divorced from her, ‘kan?”
I replied by showing the ring still curled in my ring finger short.
Nadien was shocked and angry.
“What the hell are you doing, Wi? Your husband went an obscure one full year without any intention to mend the relationship, but you still survive.”.
“It's not that easy ‘kan, Dien?”, cut me.
Nadien replied with a defiant tone.
“Why not easy? He's easy to leave you after Tia.”'s funeral
I said slowly.
“Dien, that's enough. I don't want to talk about this anymore, OK?”
Nadien answered stubbornly.
“If you don't talk to me now, who do you want to talk to?”
I raised my face and looked at him straight.
“Maybe I don't want to talk about it with anyone.”
Nadien clucked in annoyance.
“Why are you so hard to help, Wi? Why are you resisting all the efforts of people to help you?”
I said without thinking. My blood started to rise to my head.
“Because I'm not worth helping, Dien. I don't want to be helped. It's my punishment.”
Nadien widened his eyes.
“Punishment for what? What are you wrong, Wi? What happened to Tia was the will of the One Above! Not a punishment for your mistake!”
I didn't answer.
Breathing in with all my might, I closed my eyes and looked at him.
“Dien, please. I want to keep this day calm. Okay?”
Nadien was silent for a few seconds, before finally saying.
“Front semester, I will be appointed head of HR field at the foundation, Wi.”
I raised my face in shock.
“Wow! Sela..”
Nadien interrupted my words.
“And I've nominated you as my replacement at school. Foundation board has agreed.”
I'm stunned.
I stretched out my hand and held me once more. Tighter.
“I only want the best for you, Wi. Don’t you want the best for you too?”
I don't know what to say to this shocking news.
Nadien smiled, let go of my hand, and said.
“I know for sure this is a surprise for you. Sorry yes, just told you now.”
Finally the words returned to my lips.
“Surprising? This is crazy, Dien! Why should I? There's still Andrew from the Curriculum, ‘kan?”
Nadien grunts.
“That ambitious guy? No thanks, Wi. His ambition will be to sacrifice the teachers.”
I was still brainwashing, looking for another reason to speak when Nadien said again.
“It’s done, Wi. Already done. You want to protest anything can't change anything. There is still one semester, but later we talk a lot about school in these months, yes.”
I don't know what to say.
Don't even know what to feel.
Nadien finished his caffe latte and looked at the clock.
“Still at 11, Wi. I took a shower at your house, and then we went for a walk. I was bored at home. In Paskal 23 there is a sale.”
I walked with Nadien to the cashier like I was hypnotized.
The Principal.
This was my dream long ago.
A dream I had at the age of 35.
But again, I feel very guilty.
I lived, worked, and had a dream while my daughter...
“Mbak, we want to go home. So how much is it?”, asked Nadien.
The female cashier guard smiled as she replied.
“Oh, all paid, Bu.”
I woke up from the daydream and asked quickly.
“Paid? By whom, Ma'am?”
The cashier guard pointed politely towards the outside.
Right next to the table we were sitting at, there was a man.
Smile confidently and show us the coffee cup.
Unknowingly, Nadien asked quietly.
“Who is it, Wi?”
I gulped.
Dense black hair neat edges, sturdy handsome face light skinned, perfectly firm posture.
“Andra.”
Nadien turned to look at me in wonder.
“Who?”
I looked back at him.
“That's Andra, Dien. Her best friend Windra's in the hospital.”
The cashier cleared his throat and handed me a piece of paper.
“This is a message, Mom. From that Mr.”
I took the paper and read what was on it.
“For old time’s sake.”
Nadien.
“Eh, it's got another message behind it, Wi.”
I turned the paper over and found another message.
“+62 812****743. In case you want to repay me for this day.”
My eyebrows are linked as my lips open in disbelief.
What the fuck?
