The Story of a Broken Man
20. About the Ex
Go home, after eating out Joseph immediately go home. Actually Joseph's plan is less smooth, because he accidentally saw his ex with his son who was about three years old. This time with her husband. This is the second time he saw his ex after Joseph started getting to know Fitri. Somehow it feels even though it has been a long time, there is still a sense of tightness in the chest when he saw the woman who had been with him for many years was with another man. Even now it is impossible to achieve something that has been separated from it .
But the love that once existed should have been dead a long time ago. But why does jealousy always arise when you see him back? Something he never understood no matter how he thought. It feels like he deserves to be there but why should he?
He also had someone else and he loved that person. Akh, Joseph's mind became irregular again when regarding the thing that some people say is something that is not logical. He just wanted to get an answer to the question that bothered him.
***
"Hi, my name is Yusuf. Can I not know you?" This was the first time Joseph asked in a tone of voice that was like flirting with a woman with her charm.
"What reason should I tell my name?" Her name is a girl, there must be a time when they sell expensive.
"Hm.... Can't I know your name? Yes already. No matter how I know your name, I will know" Joseph was a little disappointed at the time. Maybe because there has been no woman fighting over it for a long time, so her badboy charm so worn down that she had to be rejected by a woman. It's a rare experience. He usually refused the women who approached him. I don't know why it felt like he saw something interesting about him .
He once slipped when saying this in front of one of his friends when High School first. All he got was a joke . It was like losing self-esteem. I want to feel like my friend is raging. But he still had time to think further back then. So yes, everything can be safely controlled.
After being rejected, Joseph was already curious to find out about the woman. And finally after a few days it was revealed as well. Her name is Kamila, 4th semester boy. Even if he knows, it does not mean he will be accepted by him. But Joseph did not care. Something had knocked down his wall of selfishness. It doesn't matter how much it gets rejected. Obviously, he will keep trying until he succeeds.
"Don't give up bro. He said the stone if it was dripped with water continuously it would be destroyed as well. I support you anyway. We're friends, "that's what a sweet-looking friend says in front of him. After so many years, it finally revealed all its guises. Joseph even vowed never to forgive the betrayal that had hurt his mind so badly. While with Kamila, for years even though the disappointment is very big, but he can not hate it.
***
"Well, Tumben hasn't slept yet?" Ilyas approached Joseph, who seemed to be daydreaming while looking at the moon so beautiful that night. Although not a full moon, but her beauty is always plenary.
No answer anything. Ilyas went straight to the room. He did not want Joseph to be disturbed by his presence. Maybe he needs some time alone, that's how he thinks.
It feels curious about the behavior of Joseph which he thinks is rather strange. Maybe because this was the first time he saw his brother's figure as b
it's moping durja.
The two of them had dinner outside at first as usual. But once he saw one small family, he looked strange. Like someone who avoids. Were they the ones who made Joseph pensive? But who are they? The more thought he does not understand if he does not ask directly. But he was afraid or rather reluctant to ask.
Ilyas doesn't know their relationship in the past, but it seems like they were close once . But maybe something kept them apart. That's something Ilyas doesn't know.
It had been an hour since he entered the room. He became curious, Joseph was still there or not. Because of that heightened curiosity, he came out of his room. He had not found Joseph where he was daydreaming. Ilyas immediately went back into his room. The heavy rain that suddenly came slowly made him fall asleep.
***
Joseph actually heard when Ilyas said something to him. But he was lazy to talk to others at that time even if only a word. It felt like something was breaking inside his body. After all this time, the feeling of jealousy was still binding him very strongly. Even so, the past is the past. There's nothing to do but take it all. But in fact, it's not all that easy.
When he was satisfied, his stomach became hungry. Coincidentally, he ate only a little. He had no appetite when he saw the sight that hurt his eyes. Fortunately, he was eating frozen food. Waiting for a while, he could eat it. Practical and fast, although the price is quite expensive.
He remembered Fitri, now what is he doing? Some days it doesn't feel like a miss. He wanted to come to his house, but he was wrong too if he went there. It felt like he wanted to call, but his hands seemed unable to respond. Every time he wanted to do it, his hands seemed unwilling to move like his brain commands.
Besides Fitri, he remembered Jamila. There was a bad feeling as he recalled the incident the other day at his pecel warung . What he did was the wrong thing. Why hate him for something that happened a few seconds in his past.
He thought what he was doing was too much. He wants to try to forget the incident when High School was the starting point he hated Jamila, even he branded her as a woman ******.
He should have thanked her. Thanks to that talk, he thought about his relationship with the girls who approached him . Thanks to that, he wanted to find genuine love . Not because of physical or anything else.
Even though he had thought so, it seemed that there was still a sense of prestige in his heart. He was also confused about what to say when he met her. Joseph thought he was in a sad state now.
The night is getting late. His mind also dissolved with the heavy rain that fell suddenly. In the end he prefers to sleep alone while hoping things will get better later when he awakens from his sleep.
***
