The soul mate YOU sent

Chapter 26 Wounds

Ever since that video call that night, Mas Zaky and I have been doing it more and more. At least once every two days we make a vc call. Not infrequently also vc calls when I was with Akmal. It seems like he is also getting used to Akmal's presence in every one of our talks. Even now he is more often asked about Akmal's condition and development first than I am. Several times we alluded to the possibility of elevating Akmal to our foster child. The idea of adopting Akmal didn't even come from me but from Mas Zaky. That idea certainly made me happy. I even talked about the possibility to Amara and the doctor here. It seems like the possibility of it being able to materialize is quite large. I've also discussed my plans to end volunteering with other medics. They asked me to wait until there was news of another volunteer coming. So I can't be sure when I can go home.

I haven't discussed my return plans with Mas Zaky, nor my plans to wear the hijab. That's because I wanted to make it a surprise. Until now I have not worn the hijabs I bought with Amara. But I've changed the way I dress to be more closed. Blouse-blouse and knee-length continuous skirts that I brought here have been handing out to refugees who want to wear them. Now I'm wearing the clothes I bought with Amara. Either Mas Zaky noticed my dressing change when we made the vc call or not, because he was acting so ordinary.

It's been a week since Mas Zaky called me from out of town. He said he was in business with a fabric factory that supplies materials for his convection. From our talks last night it seems there has been no sign of his affairs being completed. He also did not know when to return to Malang. It turned out that when we were far away like this it made us even closer. I used to call him if there was only business that I thought had something to do with him. But now I want to call her every second. Two months I've been here and enough for me to know how hard it is to endure longing. Hopefully soon there will be news from the volunteers who will replace me.

The hour hand in my hand already showed half a day. I'm waiting for another nurse to take my place to look after Akmal. It doesn't feel like it's a month old. I can't wait to go home and take care of the papers for his adoption. As soon as Ika, the nurse who would replace me to take care of Akmal arrived I immediately rushed off to perform dzuhur prayer and lunch. After lunch, Hakim, the chief in charge here and dr.Taufan in charge of the medical team waited to say that two volunteers had come to replace me. This news surprised me a little because there was no news before. Hakim and Dr.Taufan invited me to meet them in the tent where we usually met. As soon as I arrived at the tent, I gasped in shock as the two volunteers turned to face the entrance.

"Kok, you guys?", I asked frowning confusedly.

"Hai Tan, piye kabare?", a friendly greeting that sounds clearly made up by the man on the opposite side of the tent.

"Lan?", I demanded an explanation to Lani who was standing tensely beside Mas Damar.

"Oh you guys know each other?, good. That makes your work easier. Tan, before you leave you have to explain all your duties that sister Lani will replace. And for brother Damar will help with me in the field of logistics" said pk.Hakim before Lani could answer my question.

"Okay, sir", I replied before I left the tent.

I know Lani's tailing behind me. But I didn't even look until I was in Akmal's baby tent. The moment Lani arrived behind me and was about to say something Ika had overpowered her.

"Tan, there was a midwife from the nearest puskesmas coming. He's checking out Akmal. There are also employees from the village hall and the nearest sub-district, maybe they are doing data or something about Akmal", said Ika at length.

I felt strange about the sudden and simultaneous arrival of midwives and servants from the village and sub-district. 'Hhmmm maybe they just recorded the birth of a new resident in this village' I thought more to calm my restless heart. I forgot that Lani was still standing behind me. Until I asked who he was.

"Who is Tan?", asked Ika as she swung her chin towards my back.

That's when I just remembered that there was Lani behind me.

"Oh yeah Ka, know this Lani. He's the one who's gonna replace me here."

"Oh, hello. I'm Ika", he said as he extended his hand to Lani.

"Hi, I'm Lani", greet Lani with a smile.

"Ehm Ik, I'm staying behind. There's something I need to show Lani." I said later.

"Siiip, anyways Akmal is good. G' fussy."

After hearing Ika's reply, I immediately turned to leave the tent and followed Lani behind me. I kept walking until I found a place that people rarely pass by here.

"You are iso ulasin g' kok sampek Mas Damar iso ndek here?", I asked as soon as our feet stopped stepping.

"Sorry Tan. I'm g' iso nolak. He begs to tell you which way. A week or so he bullies me, I'm tired. He said he wanted to apologize to you and kept promising g' would bother you again".", he explained.

"How come you can keep him from volunteering here?"

"I call Amara, keep listening if you want to go back and again find a replacement volunteer. I dare call you directly, I know you're going to mengamok.", he replied again.

"Duh Laaaan's. You make the situation more complicated, you know g'? I just deket the same Mas Zaky later iki. You think wes, kiro-kiro opo seng will Mas Zaky think if you see Mas Damar here. Istrie away from home one place the same ex pacare again. Former pacare seng still say dear, love to wife. Piye?", I said frustratedly.

"Sorry, Tan. Sorry," he said slowly.

Huuuuh, free I'm angry. It's happened anyway. Now I should be able to explain this situation to Mas Zaky without causing any misunderstanding.

"Yowes, lah. Let's go back to the tent, I'll explain your duties", I said tiredly and walked ahead of him.

Just a few steps I walked, Lani hugged me from behind. I could feel his body trembling. Is she crying? Haaa...He is usually the jolly type and of course he rarely cries.

"Sorry, Tan. Ojo is angry at me. I g' ono mean to disturb you as well as Mas Zaky.", he said in tears.

"Come, iyo. Wes ojo nangis. Come back to the tent", I replied as I took off his arms.

I walked back, this time I walked beside Lani. We headed to the tent that was meant for rest. After explaining for a moment about the bed rules I told Lani to take a break because she had just taken a long trip to get here. When I got back to the medical tent Mas Damar was already there waiting.

"You're angry with Lani, I had to force her to come here and I've met you" she said as I arrived in front of her.

I don't want to have to face it. There was no time or place to avoid it anymore.

"Now wes meet! What do you want?", I asked coldly.

'Huuuffff.patience, patience. I have to be patient with men ngeyel koyok Mas Damar' my inner self in the heart.

"Yowes, come with me here" I said, walking ahead of him.

I took her to one of the medical tents that was not being used. There were several medical devices on the table, there was one seat behind it. On the side of the tent there was a folding drakbar, I chose to sit there. I don't want to sit in a chair that is in the corner and blocked by the table and drakbar. It gets me cornered if I sit there. Either because he was tired of standing or he understood my point, Mas Damar stepped up and sat down on the chair. I reached into my vest pocket to reach for my phone and typed a message on Amara and Dr.Taufan that contained me using this tent for private conversation.

"Want you to go and see Mas, until you get a gini?"

"I'm kangen. You said without news", he said casually.

"G' don't be weird wes mas, I'll say if I choose Mas Zaky.", I replied judes.

"You're I'm just licking at me again. Where could you pick Zaky. You ae just knew him yo pasirah iki right?", he casually responded to my words.

"I'm a zinc denial ono ndek your brain. I really liked Mas Zaky. Wes is mas, you're not bothering me anymore. Because wes is already here, yo you do your volunteer duty all over your heart. G'don't bother me." I said and prepared to leave.

But Mas Damar's movements are more nimble than I thought. Even though he was sitting on a chair behind a table and his path was blocked by drakbar he was quickly able to block my path.

"I'm pushing it over by the way, Nia. You g' by ninggalin your opponent speak it ae.", he said coldly while blocking my wrist.

In the past when we were still dating Mas Damar very rarely issued a cold aura like this, once he was like this it must be because I made a fatal mistake according to him. This kind of look in the eyes would scare me, but now it ignites my courage to fight it.

"Please mas! We are not zinc mahram can be lean opo again touch.", I said coldly while trying to remove the check.

"Hahahaha.nonsense! Haruse you think about it before I talk to you both gini, just talk so koyok. Anyway why just talk koyok that now if you ae until iso pregnant my son.", mas Damar's empty laughter continued with cold-pitched words and the last sentence he said whispered in my ear.

His breath in my ear tickled me all the way to my spine. I'm sojidik. No, no. Too close, this is not true. I pushed it with all my might with one free hand but could not shift it even for a moment. My free hand was back up to push again as he blocked it. Damnit damnit! Perfect. Now I really can't get away from it.

"Baby, pelin. G' funny know!", I said at last.

"Opo looks like I'm funny to you again? Me, far from being poor here just to see you. You g' iso see my efforts? G'iso see my feelings? I miss you the same. You know if I love you!!", she said coldly and ended with a shout.

Honestly, my guts started to shrink. Whatever I fight it will be for nothing. After all he was a healthy adult man whose strength multiplied stronger than my tiny body. With my position now, I was completely cornered. What I should do. The shadow of Mas Zaky immediately swelled in my head. I want to hide behind his back. 'G' by this. Thinking Tania, thinking.' cried my inner voice.

"Lapasin, mom. Or I'll scream! You hurt I know g'? My hands hurt." I said again, this time I ended with a face of pain.

Maybe he'll let go of my hand when he sees me in pain. But what he did scared me even more. He pulled my hands together so I could get closer to him. My chest was stuck to the bottom of his chest. I can feel a threatening aura coming from him. With his head down Mas Damar whispered to me.

"You stay relaxed ae, surely g' will be sick. If you continue to digress of course ae will nyakinin you.", whispered lamat-goals. He said it very slowly with his heavy voice, successfully dribbling the gallows into my spine.

I stiffened. Now I'm really scared. Isn't there someone walking around this tent? Where's everybody? Why aren't Lani or Amara looking for me? I've been gone too long, haven't I. I can only bow 'O Allah please send someone to nylametin me' my prayer in my heart. That's all I can do. I repeat it continuously. 'Stupid Tania, stupid. Bener said Mas Damar why I was rash he talked only two gini' my inner self to. As I was busy with my thoughts Mas Damar raised my chin with his hand so that I could look at his face. Only then did I realize that now Mas Damar only blocked both my hands with one hand. Maybe this is my chance, if I put all my strength in, maybe I can get away from it. 'Bismilah' with the word iku I tried to thrash, thinking that I could escape from the check. But despite trying his hardest his body did not budge at all. In fact this effort hurt my wrist even worse. The pain was stabbing to the bone. I can't help but ringisan feel this kind of pain.

"Stupid! What are you se?! Wes didn't say g' don't hang around! It's nyakin you dewe! So pingine you got away from me? Fuck!", cried Mas Damar when he saw me grimacing.

He even cursed. Then why don't he just let go of my hand. I could see the fight in his head. The look on his face is a mixture of sadness, disappointment, anger, shame and..hasrat? I don't know, I don't know what he's trying to do. Maybe I should try to talk to her slowly.

"Why do you think of se mas as gini? This isn't you. You see I know g' will hurt me like gini, iki nakutin I know g'? Pliss mas, let me yo?", I said gently trying to tear down his defenses.

"G' try Nia. I know how you're gonna let me take you off, right? Lustful Nia, kebala.", cynical. "You're diem ae g' to volunteer a lot. Enjoy every touch as usual every time I touch you." he continued with a grin I had never seen before from him.

I literally stiffened in fear as her lips descended into my ears exhaling a tickle of pain at each joint of my bones. Slowly down the cheek until it ends in the neck. No, of course my body's reaction is not what it used to be when he touched me. My eyes were tightly closed. I froze, my mind blank in a blanket of intense fear. 'Allah, please protect me, I know this is the fruit of my carelessness. But I beg, O God, please protect me.' The prayer keeps spinning in my heart.

"Hiks.".", a sob escaped my lips before I even realized I was crying.

I slowly opened my eyes as I felt Mas Damar motionless. Her lips that were still in my neck were slowly moving away. He straightened himself and finally our gazes met. For how long we just stood staring at each other. My crying still hasn't stopped, I don't know why I can't stop it. Suddenly my hand escaped from the check. I looked down at my wrist. I can assure you that the red marks there will be bluish bruises tomorrow.

"Go.", Mas Damar's cold voice surprised me.

I'm staring. Seen on his face he was very hurt. Missing is already a friendly figure with a sweet smile that I have known all along. Replaced the cold, wounded figure that was now standing before me.

"Go tell me!!", he shouted while I was still sitting in place.

I tiptoed to hear her screams. My heart sees it like this. Did I make it like this? O Allah, give the best way for each of us.

"A second you g' rush off, I'll actually sell me to you. Go Nia, GO!!"

This time I moved straight towards the door of the tent away from him. I looked over for a while before being completely away from the door. I can see Mas Damar standing stiffly with his shoulders shaking and hands clenching. 'Sorry if I hurt you, but now my heart belongs to my inner Mas Zaky' as I get further away from that tent.