Loving You In Silence

Episode 21

Two weeks passed, the semester exams were now in sight, all the students were busy with their respective affairs, the organization was temporarily abandoned and the campus library was getting crowded every day. Not to miss Zahra's boarding room which is like Anita's second home. Almost every day Anita came, just unwind or study with Zahra, but rarely Anita stay there. About Anita and Hanif, they were off communicating since a week ago. Hanif is now 5th semester, his concentration he focuses entirely on college.

There is also a good thing that Kiara asked for a breakup.  Hanif murmured in his room.

During the exam, the atmosphere of the campus becomes calmer. Even with the unclear rumors that these few weeks bother Anita and Hanif even Zahra.

***

The semester exam has passed, and the month of Ramadan arrives. The campus is getting quiet because many students who choose to return home enjoy Ramadan with family. But for some students are forced to stay because of organizational responsibilities, such as Hanif, Zahra and some other friends.

“bu treasurer, I need immediate funds to print event pamphlet date 13.” Pinta Rama to Anita the treasurer. Rama is a member of the PR division.

“how?” ask Anita.

“as per already budgeted.” Answer Rudi again.

“well, I prepare first. Later I call again if the funds are ready.” Anita. Rudi just gave his thumbs up ‘OK’. Then Anita again checked the budget map of funds needed by the PR division.

A few minutes later, someone approached Anita.

“bu treasurer, ba’da maghrib later I will have to pay the consumption bill for yesterday and dp for tomorrow's meal booking.” Said Hanif without pause and Anita just nodded.

During these few days, almost every day met with Hanif. Their conversation is about activities. Not more. I don't know, mas Hanif feels different in his eyes, anita feels mas Hanif withdraws from her, so Anita also does the same to Hanif.

“ini mas..” hand over a wad of money to Hanif.

“I can't, Nit. I'm afraid later the money tucked or scattered, I'm not used to bring cash as much.” Hanif.

“mas later can ask for help from other members of the mas right?” anita replied while throwing a smile. Stiff.

Hanif. Confused by Anita's suddenly cold attitude towards him.

“does there need another, mas?” tanya Anita disperse the Hanif daydream. The person in question looked closely at Anita and then shook her head.

Hanif left Anita alone with feelings that somehow. Disappointed? Saddened? Empty? Although Annita said 3 days but why did Hanif feel that it would be so long will not see Anita again.

While Anita felt a pain in her heart. He deliberately stayed away. A few days after she stopped communicating with Hanif she felt her feelings deepening, and now not wanting to get entangled any deeper, then Anita decided to distance herself. Were it not for the business of this organization he would have been reluctant to see Hanif.

***

Back to Semester Testing.

Exams are still going on, Hanif himself chose to focus on the exam. But the memory of her lover's statement a few weeks ago suddenly burst back. There is love and anger and also disappointment. Hanif several times looked back at his heart, whether he would still fight for it or not

really took it off. On the other hand, there was Anita in her memory, the woman made her comfortable. The woman made him forget his ex-girlfriend. She made herself laugh with him. And the woman also somehow Hanif felt light to tell him anything. It was as if he believed that he was the right person for him to share his story.

Unfortunately, Hanif did not realize that the feeling was love for him. Hanif only considers it a comfort as a colleague, not between a man and a woman.

Hanif really felt a sense of unease. But after a few days of contemplation Hanif decided to fight back his lover, because however he had promised the parents of the lover that there was an intention to propose to him. However, what disturbs his mind is that with the decision then inevitably he must keep a distance with Anita. There's a little fear in him if he has to lose Anita.