I'm Afraid of Falling in Love

Know me well?

You are good, but good is not enough for more than just friends.

- Blue-Eye

The clang of the incoming message tones ituterus continuously mnegusikku who tried to close his eyes. Who dares to disturb the free time of the Blue Gem, gururtu upset. It is not that the freedom that is obtained is the opposite. Don't know what he is, that I have to write a lot of articles tonight.

Drive :

Gem, is it busy now?

If you are not busy, reply dong

Not college today?

What time is college?

The arggg! This guide is why it is so different from Pandu who volunteered to help me, now even messing with my sleep meeting with prospective priests.

Because I was already upset I did not reply to him, I better continue to sleep, resting the brain that I had been thinking since. Don't mind a freak like Pandu. Let's go to bed the Jewels.

The argg! Damn my eyes can't be closed. What kind of pellets do Pandu use so that it can mess with my body and mind. I lazily reopened the message from Pandu. Haven't had time to open it Pandu called me.

“Hallo.” Reply lazily.

The voice over there sounded noisy, whether it was on the hemisphere where the Pandu was. “Lesu bener.” His comments.

I did not heed the words, my body is limp now need to sleep, many times it has also evaporated, unfortunately the eyes do not want to be closed. “What's up?”

“Juye aja.”

“Whypa?!” I'm upset, really upset right now. I think there's something important he'll talk about. I forgot who called this Pandu is not Agla or one of my friends.

“Why? Can't you?”

“Can't!!” Hardikku angry.

Honestly, I really don't like talking on the phone, actually, it's a little awkward, it's better to talk in person. Especially me and Pandu just knew. It's not that I'm arrogant for not answering his calls, but I'm not the one who likes to spend time on such things.

“Kok angry anyway?”

“It's you disturbing my sleep!!” I said to you who are not friendly.

“Already if bother me hang up the phone.”

It seems Pandu knew that I was indeed disturbed, this time without waiting for my answer he immediately hung up.

I lay down on the bed, staring at the ceiling of the room that had not changed during this one year.

It is only fitting that I have no close friends, my nature to Pandu just now might make him think several times when approaching me.

I flinched, is Pandu any sign of approaching? Thinking about the nature of Pandu makes me dizzy.

I went from the bed to the wardrobe under which some important files were stored. I better take care of the cpns test than take care of the romance that is not clear.

The requirements and files that must exist are like a High School diploma because I have not passed the exam, continue skck from the police who fortunately have made July can still be used until now. It is important not to forget about ID. I checked the files many times and put them in a folder. Make it easy if you need to.

Finished with taking care of the files, I chose to read the registration flow that might not be easy. If it's easy, of course, there are many lists. The more you see the groove is complicated, it is worth a lot of sudha who gave up at the beginning. Huft, the spirit of the Jewel.

Wait a minute, this groove is definitely not easy. I have to ask who did take the cpns test as well. Want to ask The Rahma is not good if on the phone or chat, it is better to chat directly, other friends may not be on the follow. Who could possibly help me?

I've thought about it before. I better try to find materials to write articles. What is suitable for this theme? This month there is an agenda to collect articles to be powdered, I want to raise about what? Interesting and also contains.

I'm trying to find a book on the national library app. After writing ‘Education’ on the search page several book titles have sprung up. There is one title of the book that caught my attention ‘Educating Winners Not Losers’, it seems like this can be made reference material.

I downloaded the book first, and after I finished downloading it I started reading it. The language is good to read, although the language is heavy I do not easily sleepy. In addition, the book written by two people presents some experience in the field. There were so many events that I was amazed, astonished, and moved.

Especially about a naked emperor pandir, as if the portrait that occurred in Indonesia is listed with gambling in the writing.thank you mbak Puji and mas J. Sumardianta, my insights have increased due to reading both of you books.

“Huaaa.” I yawned a few times while reading this book.

It seems like my sleepiness is starting to come back. Better rest now or not at all. Let's get our bodies to break from the most bitter realities in life.

***

“Ta, wake up already want ashar.” Shouted my mother from outside the room.

I squirm a little, but I haven't gotten out of bed yet. What time is it now? My hands fumbled through the mattress, looking for where the cell phone was. Not finding a cell phone in bed, I got up.

Half at 4.

I went out of the room and went into the bathroom.

“Ta.” Call my mom when I go to my room again.

“Iya ma.”

“So take the cpns test?”

“So ma.” Mama smiled, I was glad to comply with my mother's wishes. There is a part of my heart that feels empty.

“When in notya?” I forgot not to look at the schedule.

“Not yet, later in check again. Not yet open.”

Mama nodded, I withdrew to go into the room. Carry out my duties as a Muslim, which I still sometimes pervert. After the prayer I sat quietly in my bed while playing my phone.

The guide again sent me a message, did he have no other activities other than the course and idle me. Do I try to reply, but if in reply later my time will be wasted. Just try first.

Drive :

Have you reached home? Have you eaten yet?

Today in college?

Me :

No, it's a holiday. What is it is that is still this busy.

I purposely replied so that he knew that I had no time to discuss unimportant matters, my time was precious only to discuss about having eaten or not. I'm sure humans need to eat, which I probably won't.

Drive :

What else dong?

How to compare Pandu with Agla? The point is they're both different, not that I consider Agla different from most other men, I like her. Not so, we're close to High School, one class for three years. One organization and he always asks for my help.

Why is my brain thinking about Agla and Pandu instead, when there are urgent things that I have to do now instead of thinking about the two of them. There is one task of an online authorship group, making a poem about yourself.

I

Mute

Ah time after all, I can not be mute, just friends in silence and can not speak as the heart wishes. Can it be categorized as mute too? Mute in another sense in my opinion, but the time of the word is made into poetry.

Friends with silence

Talking at night, alone

Look at the sky and the moon

He is always a witness to every pain

Wow this seems good, do I have to cultivate again. Scribbles after graffiti that filled the white paper made my forehead sometimes wrinkle, my mouth laugh and tears let out involuntarily. How long have I been friends with a lonely man?

I don't know, just by writing I can reveal all the feelings that have perverted my chest. Pain, tightness, disappointment, sadness, full of blue, and everything I experience every day, I always write in a book called diary.

It feels like laughing from my childhood is still a routine activity until now.who thought at the age of 19 years I still like to write diaries. If anyone finds out about it, maybe I'll be a laughing stock.

May no one know it until I tell it myself in a novel or biorafi about my own life. I don't want to be famous, I want to share these sad things so that no one lives like me anymore.

It feels, very happy if a story or writing written based on heart and heartfelt feelings can reach the reader. In the hope, they can take wisdom and lessons, take the good away from the bad.

No time has shown at half-six. I had to hurry to take a shower. After that, my writing will be collected and later assessed. I have not yet created a picture that contains an interesting writing.

***

When it has turned the Pandu name data back into the top list of chat senders. I really like him to talk to me who is nobody. It's not that I don't want to reply to her chat, but I have to collect this poetry assignment right away. Otherwise, the time is up. I read the poem I made.

I

Friends with silence

Talking at night, alone

Look at the sky and the moon

He is always a witness to every pain

Only able to remain silent

Like a little princess imprisoned in a palace

Unable to say no

Nor can he leave at will

I smiled satisfied with my poem, my goal was not to win. Just want to share every taste I taste, bitter sweetness of life with me as the main character. I squirmed a little, thinking it was melting.

After I finish one job, I have to do another. The holidays were more exhausting than the usual days. Playing social media for a while there will be no problem, no, let alone my phone continues to clink, incoming messages are requested to be read immediately.

Agla :

Ta, later we meet in cfd aja yes I want to run and all breakfast there.

Me :

Ok

Switch reading to another message that is equally important to me. I massaged my head slowly, dizzy it felt when the writing deadline was in front of the eyes there was another deadline that asked to be completed.

Writing for a book is not done yet, now there is a writing schedule on the blog. It's okay, I really like to write, hopefully with this activity can have a positive effect on the reader. Especially in the field of education. Looks like today I'm gonna stay up again, cayo.

***

I chose writing after getting inspiration from the book I read. About the naked emperor who is associated with the reality of education today. We all feel like fools, students run away and teachers chase after them. Though if it can walk hand in hand why must race who used to arrive.

The world of education will never end. The neighboring country that is advancing and we are still lagging behind may even still be quiet in place. Frequent changes in education ministers that cause changes in the curriculum that continue to change.

When the 2013 curriculum was still not going well, it was replaced again with a national curriculum. Whose fault is this, actually? The government often replaces the minister of education, students who lack supervision and teachers who lack skills.

Many teachers are still difficult to use a computer and it's not just a bunch of back nonsense. For example, when I was in High School, there were so many complaints about the difficulty of understanding the brain during old age, so we should not waste time young.

That's not the point, the less capable teacher, in my opinion because it has been implementing a system that has nothing to do with computers. For example, during a math lesson, the teacher explains on the board and the student listens while taking notes.

If the learning is done using computer aids, surely we will not all be blinded and the 2013 curriculum will be easier to apply. I salute the Sundanese language teacher in High School first, when we first went to 2nd High School. My friends and I have been given the task to make a music video sunda music and interview historic places in Bandung.

Both of these tasks desperately need the help of a computer and its friends.

A good video of course must be edited id first and if it is displayed raw, it may not be pleasant to see and watch. From here we learn a lot about video editing which will certainly be useful in the future. Not only the material we get, but also a field practice.

It seems like the things above are good if I include them in the article later. I will record the points first while collecting some data and references so that my certificate does not seem pretentious. When turning this data on is Pandu back to send a message to me.

Guide: Why haven't you slept

Me: Sorry I'm still busy

Guide: Sleeping is already night

The more he texted the more upset I got, he told me to go to sleep and then why keep texting. I knew I said I was busy still texting. Then, why am I even replying to him?

Goal : What are you doing?

Me : Very good at it

Pandu : Not thanks for being helped

Me : Thank you

Pandu : That's how to thank you

Me: What do you want to do ?

D: Already have a boyfriend?

I turned off the phone data. My chest rumbled, not because of some sort of thumping from falling in love, but because of an upset. Have a right what he asks like that. Just know this, how ya. You are good Pandu, but good is not enough for more than just friends.