I Accept You What It Is

The Feeling of Wanting to Die

As time went on, Jeny pondered deeply into her own solitude, remembering something that had happened

on him this afternoon, it really made him feel very sad and disappointed, there was no hope to be happy, and no intention to tread a bright future, he said, he seemed to lose the spirit to go to his future, and at least there was no desire to reach his dream, he had hoped, that he would pursue his dream, that he would pursue it, by forgetting the memories that were once scratched by a deep wound and have been exposed, but it will not be possible again he pursued, because Jeny felt discouraged.

Nothing can make him happy, because the Typhoon has destroyed his life, and destroyed his dream dream, has killed his spirit that has just begun to grow, only one desire is to end his life, he said, only that can end his suffering, but is it right ? Jeny was very confused thinking about it, what should she do ?

Jeny could not sleep overnight, her eyes felt sore, as a result of prolonged crying.

the next day, early in the morning, Deril had come to Jeny's house, it turned out that Jeny had woken up, but he was reluctant to get out of his bed, he felt he did not want to go anywhere.

But because he heard Deril's voice calling him, Jeny then woke up and opened the door of his house, he already knew that the one who came was Deril his best friend, and he was his friend, what's more, Deril's voice has a very distinctive voice in Jeny's ear, so even though Deril from far away calls him, he will know that it's Deril's voice, moreover, Deril had knocked on the door several times, and called his name, so Jeny immediately woke up.

"For Jen, "what's up ?

Deril said to his friend, Deril smiled to greet his friend, but he did not see the sweet smile from the face of his friend, which was just the face of Jeny who looked dull, and she was not, with the appearance of hair that looks tangled, messy and irregular, it seems that Jeny is not okay.

"Morning as well, "go to Ril...

Jeny takes her best friend in, and Deril follows Jeny from behind.

The more Deril see the condition and appearance of Jeny's face, there is something different from his best friend, he noticed, Jeny seems less healthy and not excited, even though the feeling, jeny afternoon yesterday is fine, just fine, even Jeny was very excited to go on vacation with Deril, but why until now Jeny really, not ready yet ?

Deril asked in his heart, "what is going on with Jeny ?

"Ril, "Lo, don't be disappointed ? "Looks like we're not going Ril, I don't feel well...!

Jeny answered her best friend.

Actually, Jeny did not have the heart to see her best friend, Deril must be very disappointed, because this weekend's holiday is not so, but what you want to say, what happened, is not his will, not his will, but rather the will of the ignor*******am Typhoon that Bre******k it, so Jeny's whole body ached all the pain, especially at the core, not just that, it was, his heart was also, moreover, extremely sick.

If it wasn't for him, that jerk, Jeny would have been very happy, because she could have been on vacation with her best friend.

" Loh, "Why Jen ?

Deril was astonished by Jeny's attitude this morning, not as usual.

" I'm not feeling well anymore, Ril, "my body feels sick, weak, the taste is not strong to go today, he said,

we have holidays when!

"Jeny makes excuses that Deril doesn't want to know in reality, he just wants enough yes who thinks about it, he doesn't want his best friend to think about it, he just wants his best friend to think about it, because there's too much for Deril to think about.

When it came to Jeny's knowledge, Deril held Jeny's forehead, but it wasn't hot.

" But this, isn't it hot ?

No more problems, right ?

Deril asked Jeny seriously, because he noticed, it looks like Jeny is hiding something from him,

Because it looks from the attitude of Jeny, which is a little strange, and not as usual.

"What the hell is Jen... ?

l know! ''Surely you're hiding something from me again ? "Let's tell me the same story, you can't think for yourself, you have me, why do you have to think for yourself ?

Deril asked Jeny a little pushy, because Deril knew exactly who his best friend was.

"Topan yesterday, here Ril.

jeny replied briefly.

"So far, why isn't he the same?

Deril hopes nothing happens to his best friend.

" He did that again Ril... !

"Keep it out, will you ?

ask Deril again.

"Gue can what Ril?

"how do I fight it ?

there was nothing I could do at the time, other than surrender.

jeny replied and started to shed her tears.

" Lo why the hell is Jen? ''You should be treated like that, you fight dong, just cook it still !

"Where can I fight,,, ? ''he has a video, though,

the other """"""***'xxx with me, "If I volunteer and refuse his wish, he wants to spread the video, "Where to try... ?

" You know for yourself, don't you, Typhoon ?"he never played with his words.

" Oh my goodness, Jeny, "Or gini aja, if according to the cave, "mending lo say honestly with aunt lo, you tell me what has been done his son to lo... !

deril's advice to his best friend.

"That can't be Ril, where dare I do that, I can't !

" But you can continue to digituin same Typhoon.. ?

didn't you.. ? ''it's not like, you see that yourself, you're in the situation now? ''you know that you're sick Jen, not just her body that hurts, but her heart and feelings you?

"gue who just mengeliatin lo, feel it.

Jeny was silent, listening to the words of her best friend, it was true what Deril said, yes it hurts, not just her body that hurts, but her heart, soul and feelings.

But what to do, I can't do what Deril said, how can I.

"Jeny, "do you hear what I say?

or, I was the one who told Auntie Lo, the cave said, if the Typhoon has ruined your life... !

Jeny was silent, staring down, tampa meaning, and made Deril more and more compassionate and excited to see the fate of his best friend.

Deril can't bear to see Jeny's condition like that.

"Jeny, I know what you're thinking, but don't sacrifice your feelings and your self, for the happiness of others.

gua think you understand the meaning of my speech.

"Gue does not know anymore Ril, have to cram my life like what, my life has been destroyed Ril, my future is also destroyed, I can't help myself anymore to survive like this,

I want to die Ril.

I want to follow my parents.

let all the burdens of my life be lost.

''Stop Jeny... !

don't say that ! ''your life is long, there are no problems that cannot be solved.

Dead,,,? "not the right way, to solve the problem.

" Remember Jeny, God will not give trials to his creatures, beyond the limits of his abilities.