The Love of the Former

DCSM chapter 50

I'm hard to close these eyes for a second. It was very clear the straightforward words thrown by Mas Pri. I'm stunned by everything that happened tonight.

Was it wrong the decision I made?

Retreating? of course it's no longer possible for me to do. I looked at my face beside me. The face of a man who had been my husband since this morning. The face that is always there every day but not in my heart.

I wrote a small clock in the corner of the table, and I'm sure tonight I'll never close my eyes again. The clock shows at 3 a.m. But my mind still wanders far away.

It's true what people say, crying in silence is a really painful thing. Resisting the pain in a smile it sliced a soul-wrenching wound. Everything I have felt.

"This is a new bride, still early in the morning. Think what the hell? horse horse horseman? Be patient first, later or tomorrow you can ride your horse." With a cup of coffee in his hand. Mas Made sat down beside me. This morning we were on the floor above my house.

Down there, it still looks frenzied bustle of people who dismantle the tent. And the neighbors who are still helping are in order.

"By the way there's no brake, ma'am."

"And it's not an AKAP bus so it doesn't have brakes. Los doll anyway."

"I shook my head with my cousin's behavior. Among others, Mas Made is the most loving. He'll look cute in front of other people. But it changes in detail when you are with people who love you.

"What do you think? a debt?" Actually, if his mouth is open then there will be a magic sentence that he said.

"What debt try." I breathe deeply.

"The horse debt." His grin was without sin. When I put my eyes in.

"Other people think, sir. Thank goodness I don't owe this debt. I don't know if you're the same father without my knowledge."

"Mas was in love, wasn't he?" I continued my words before Mas Made' mouth opened again.

"Fall in love you really mean?" I looked at it for a moment.

"Emang yes, fell in love with a lie."

"Pretend to be in love when you're not."

"Fall in love I mean, Mas. Who can't forget even though he tried, that's for example."

For a moment, Mas Made looked at me. There was a slight frown on his forehead and it seemed like he was thinking about my question. In her shredded coffee in a cup slowly.

"Get up, and it's very hard to forget. It can only be left and become a memory. Because no matter how you fight it. That feeling will bind you even stronger. And how much you want to let go, the more pain you feel. Let go, be sincere and he'll disappear on his own."

"All my words are so young I say and so easy to hear, right?" Mas Made smiled.

"But the practice is very difficult to do. It takes time to know when, of course it is not for a moment. I feel it myself. Do not be resisted if the taste is present, but try to accept and accept. It will slightly reduce the pain in your heart."

I lowered my face. What Mas Made said was all true. It's been too long, I think, try and keep trying until the end point of the decision I'm making now. But there is still room that hurts and it torments me. Especially considering the words he said last night.