The Hijrahku Journey

START TO IMPROVE

One month before getting the job I decided to move, really did not want to date and focus on improving myself.

The incident with Erik who could not keep his promise made me realize that men who just make promises are not men who deserve to be trusted and defended.

Therefore I decided to be closer to Allah and I entrusted everything to Allah SWT.

The hijrah process that I do starts from the clothes that used to be hijab following the style of today, wearing pants, all of which I get rid of and replace it with a scarf robe.

When wearing shar'i clothes I feel calm in addition I always get closer to Allah SWT.

Although not immediately changed completely but slowly I began to learn, trying to carry out the mandatory and sunnah.

In my mind is just preparing myself if it is time for me to return then I am ready to face Allah SWT. Even for a soul mate I just say, "If in this world I have no soul mate then in the hereafter God has prepared the best soul mate for me. But if indeed God has prepared a soul mate for me in this world then meet me with him who can become a priest and lead me to be closer to Allah SWT."

Everything that happened before made me think a lot that God kept me away from the wrong people because it was wrong,God kept me away from the wrong things so that I could better myself and I was grateful to know the truth sooner before I got caught further by his lies.

Now I am calm and comfortable with my life.

In the office I started mingling with the others but for the men I chose the closed and silent lot, over bowing my head while walking in front of them.

At the time of prayer I tried to be on time and Alhamdulillahnya in the office there is a musholla so employees can still pray worshipers,one of the things that makes me feel at home because I feel my way to want to improve myself is easy.

Added to meet with friends who also keep worship so I was helped also with them.

During work I always try to pray always awake and on time, I try to balance between work and obligations.

That's how every day I do, get used to myself more silence but the work goes on.

But there are things that make me feel uncomfortable because Erik is still always trying to contact me when the number was already I block, Erik,but Erik's not his name if it does not run out of sense.So he uses his friend's number to call me and more sprains I.April follow-up contact me if his phone erik is not active as if it's my fault.

Ringing from an unknown number.

"Hello, Assalamualaikum." My speech.

"Wa'alaikum salutations." Reply Erik across the phone.

"It turns out you are."Ketus.

"Yes, how are you?" Ask as if he cares.

"Good." Answer's short.

"Thank God, but you don't get sick often, do you?" Still do care.

"Yes, no, Tumben cares." Lazy say.

"Who, even though we're not close, we can still be friends, there's no harm if I care." The answer was as relaxed as Erik's usual attitude, no guilt.

"Ooo.but I don't think you need to care anymore afraid your boyfriend is angry if you call me again." Insinuating Erik to be conscious but seemed to have no effect.

"No, he won't be angry." He said casually.

"Udah rik, I don't want any more problems with you in addition to your girlfriend will be angry." More lazy to serve Erik.

"No need to think about him.you think it's that easy, he'll find you and will call me on if you don't have any news." I'm getting angry, my voice is starting to rise.

"Udahlah.I am tired of cha with her childish nature." Erik.

"She is your boyfriend and has accepted all your bad but instead you are ugly like this.luckily not me who survives because you will definitely treat it like this." Without thinking about his feelings I expressed my annoyed feelings.

"Yes different is the cha, if you endure I will not treat you like this because you are the one I hope to endure."Trying to seduce again.

"That's not going to happen, I know what you're saying right now you're going to say the same to him.already read you rik." Answer ketus

"No cha'..." Still brushed off my words.

"No, your boyfriend called me, it must be because you have no news." I looked at the phone screen and there was a call from April.

"yes he called but I didn't pick him up." Said relaxed.

"Yes, pick up the phone from your boyfriend."I turned off the phone unilaterally.

But on the other hand April kept calling me, with me forced to pick up.

"Assalamualaik." My speech.

"Erik called you cha??" April Saying.

"No, why."Cover up from April, so they don't fight.

"Honestly cha because hp is not lifted from earlier, busy continues." April continues to urge

"Hmmm.iya erik did call me but used another number." I was honest in the end.

"Right, erik is still calling you." April sounded disappointed.

"Don't misunderstand April, so she just asked me if there was no other meaning." Trying to calm.

"But he still calls you when he promised cha but it's still like that." I heard April's sobs.

"You're patient, it's not easy for Erik to change, but he'll be aware of himself for a long time." Persuading April.

"But until when is cha?, I'm also confused that Erik keeps it up when I've relented and held on for him." Sense.

"Don't know either, which is for sure I have nothing to do with Erik even the number I've blocked according to your request." My speech.

"I'm still trying to survive cha but then this keeps me tired too." April continued to cry.

"Yes, you called Erik, I want to go to sleep and hopefully Eric can change." I tried to calm April down, I couldn't bear to see her like that but she herself chose to do it so she had to take the risk of her decision.

"Yes, thank you cha."Hang up.

It was fortunate that I was able to be firm with Erik back then, otherwise there was no way I would have experienced the same thing that happened in April at this time.

Obviously it is not easy to change someone with his old habits, need patience to deal with it. Otherwise it will be like April who continues to fight alone but Erik even continues to behave as he pleases.