The Heart of Raisya

family gathering

At 4 pm we arrived home, there was no sign of anyone outside, maybe ummi and aba in the room.

"I'm leaving, as soon as I'm going to take care of our divorce." she said quietly in the room

"Alright, be careful, brother. Thank you for driving me."

I kissed the back of his hand one last time. Yes, it's all over. My home story with him is over. I can't describe how I feel right now.

Until nightfall I was still locked in my room, because I did not pray. My guest has been coming since this morning. Stomach pain, heart pain, eye pain. Complete is my suffering. I did not dare to go out of the room, I was confused what to say to my parents if they asked Kak Firman. This time I can't lie anymore. But I'm not ready to make them break. What I am most worried about is my grandmother.

I passed my dinner. Befriended with pillows and bolsters, lamenting my fate. It's destiny. God knows what's best for me.

The next morning, about 5 a.m. I faintly heard someone banging on my bedroom door.

dor dor dor's... "Raisyaaa, Raisya..." Ummi's voice called out to me. I got up and opened the door to my room.

"yes ummi, I do not pray anymore obstacles." I said, with a consciousness that has not been collected perfectly. Ummi nyelonong entered my room.

" Here sit ummi to talk." Ummi asked me to sit on my bed.

" Where's your husband?"

my heart seemed to stop, my consciousness was full. It seems like it's time I told you everything. Maybe sooner is better.

"You're okay, right?" I haven't been able to answer yet, ummi has asked me another question. "Your eyes are swollen, you're crying Rai? y'all fighting?"

"Ummi forgive Raisya, I want to split up." reveal carefully.

" you mean?"

" Brother Firman has my mentality mi." answered me with teary eyes, as hard as I hold back, I am just an ordinary man. And in front of this man who gave birth to me, I can't hold him back.

" Astagfirullah, ummi's hunch is not good these few days. Ummi see there's an awkwardness in your household. What's your problem Rai? Ummi knew you couldn't possibly make a mistake, what was the reason that Firman divorced you?"

" There were other women before me mi, she couldn't let go, I didn't know what their status was, which obviously our relationship was over."

I saw abi enter my room, probably because I waited for ummi long time not to come out.

" ummi abi, I'm sorry Raisya. Not able to give the best for abi and ummi.Raisya has disappointed you. Raisya has let grandma down, "I sobbed.

" No son, you're not wrong. You have done your best, you have been devoted to us and your grandmother, we are selfish. Here too it is the Word that is wrong, as a man he has absolutely no courage and responsibility" said Abi with little emotion.

Which parent is not angry if he sees his child hurt.It is natural that it happens to my parents, but I must still give understanding and strength so that they are not controlled by anger.

" It's all fate ma'am, Raisya is fine. Just what Raisya thought of grandma, Raisya was afraid of grandmother being shocked and fell ill hearing this news. May we all be given the strength to face this test."

" you take it easy, hopefully your grandmother can accept all this, abi grateful you can be strong son. Don't be sad there are us here." abi hugged me and ummi stroked my head giving strength.Of course I don't foam holding back my tears. But I must not show too much sadness in front of them. I have to be strong for them.

I am so glad I told my parents. May I live strong for the time to come.

At sunrise ummi and abi leave for grandmother's house to visit and have a meeting with the family of Sak Firman. I hope the relationship between our families will be fine even if our relationship is over.

"Eh mbak tomorrow the streets yuk! I need to get a list of lectures."

"Where are you going? mbak's males out."

"Shoping is, not at home continue Bete. mbak jang dizzy-dizziness think of people who never care about the same mbak ya. There are still many good men who want to be the same mbk."

"Yes yes, tomorrow we shop to the city market, satisfied?"

"Yes!! nach gitu dong mbk. "sofi pinched both cheeks fat.

" au au, pain dik. What a hand is a crab, so evil."

" Let me realize that the pain must be noiseless."

While the time I just wanted to be in the room, Sofi went out to buy snacks for us.

...****************...

flash back on

All have gathered at the house of my grandmother, parents, mother and uncle Kak Firman.

" where's the word why isn't he coming?" ask abi

" Sorry ji, Firman's not home."

" Oh, so you don't have the guts to meet us, and admit your mistake?"

" I'm sorry, my son is guilty.I don't know if he's going to be this close, it's also our fault that didn't ask for his approval.

" My son did not marry me to be a widow, why did the Word have the heart to let all this drag on, if indeed he could not accept it should have been from the beginning he had refused. My son may be patient, but not with me. Word has trampled my pride."

the atmosphere was getting tense, abi could barely control himself.

" Nasi has become a porridge ji, forgive us can not change this situation, we can not hold the Word, as his Uncle I am also ashamed of his actions. we started the relationship well so we hope it ends well too." Uncle chimed.

"it's easy to just say.well if it's like that, I don't want to waste my time, tell the Word, deal with this divorce immediately..."

"iya ji, we'll take care of it soon. We hope our relationship will be okay."

It was all over, grandma could only cry.

Flashback Off

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