The Heart I Choose

Episodes 2.13

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This week I plan to go back to my mom's house. Wish they would be kind enough to meet me with Dika. Two weeks is not a short time not to meet children. I bought Dika's favorite food. Sweet cheese, although a little difficult to find in the morning.

My father and mother told me there was overtime in the Tian warehouse. Because Dad would have banned me, if he knew I'd be back there. Hearing their treatment stories made Dad always sad. Dika is the first grandchild for Father, while Dika for them is the umpteenth grandchild, will certainly be different unfortunately. That's what Dad always thought, if Dika was abandoned there.

I chose to take public transportation only, it feels more efficient than taking an online motorcycle taxi. My money is running low while the payday is still one week away. The distance from my home is quite far, it is necessary to change public transportation twice.

I finally got to the green house. Lots of vehicles parked in the yard. It seems they are gathering. This is the routine in the Mas Wandi family that I can't forget. They always took the time to gather, because each already has their own home, their presence is very much awaited Papa and Mama.

There was a real fear, wanting to turn around....

But, this is my only chance, the other day I have to work bad must be permission with Tian, if using time to work for family matters. I have to be brave. Must....

Bismillah.ku round up the determination to step foot in front of the door.

"Assalamualaik."

My voice is greeting. All eyes turned to look at me, who was standing in front of the door.

"Waalaikumsalam," I only heard the voice of Mother Goddess answering greetings, the others just looked at each other. Even Mas Wandi's younger brother chose to enter the room.

Ma'am Dewi greeted me with a smiling face as usual. Even though I feel stiff, "How are you, Mia? Where's kiyah?" ask Mbak Dewi while inviting me in.

Doubtful I walked, my eyes looking at every eye that seemed to strip. "Alhamdulillah well, Ma'am. Kiyah with Mom at home." I walked in front of Mother Goddess, "Mbak, when will I arrive?"

"Last night, when were you there again? Play to Mommy's house."

I'm just smiling. A city full of memories. The wounds he incised were too painful, so just remembering them could make me run away. Let this remain a memory I won't let go back.

I approached Mama who was looking at me. He tried to be sweet, turning one hundred and eighty degrees from his attitude two weeks ago. Maybe he's not good with Madam Dewi, his favorite daughter-in-law. I took his hand that began to wrinkle, it had been a long time that I did not touch, the hand that I used to always look for asking for blessing every time I wanted to leave. I kissed respectfully the back of his hand, may with this our sins fall on each other.

I don't want to ask you how, I see it looks like he's okay. He must have been happier with the grandchildren in his house. But the wrinkle on her face was a sign that she was not okay. He could have been suffering from growing tired he had to go back to take care of Dika. I don't care, he wants to hold Dika for the sake of his favorite boy's ego.

I saw Dika running from the floor of my mother's house. Her body looks thinner than usual, "Mama...." He screamed while hugging me.

Her tiny body, hiding in an embrace, was as tight as it could never be released again. "When I miss Mama. Mama why don't you ever come here again?"

What should I answer. Don't remember him, two weeks ago I had to scream, struggling to see him, but no one cared. When Dika chose to stay here instead of coming home, don't you remember him? the answer he gave back then was always in his mind. But, my son is not wrong there must be incitement so he unknowingly hurt this heart.

"Sorry, my mom is here now. Mama also miss Dika, so now Mama is looking for work in a better place. Let Mama have money to take Dika home."

"Where's your mom working now?"

"You Ma...."

Looks like Dika's bright cheerful face.

His grandmother in front of us interjected, "Where is school! Can't come with Mama yet. The teacher's mother will be angry."

Mama's words made a guts out of Dika.

"Yes Ma, wait for the holidays!"

"Yes, it's okay, later if Dika just take a day off." I reply, caressing Dika's hair that began to be long.

My eyes looked at Mama who seemed to be smiling triumphantly. But it's not about winning. I gave up on Dika's happiness. Keeping his feelings like the fruit of Simalakama. 'Let Dad die, not be eaten by a dead mother.'

"When playing again same bang Rehan yes! Mama wants to talk to grandma for a second. Later if you have, Mama call Dika again!"

I let Dika out of the embrace. Because there's something important I want to talk about. He was too small to understand it. Dika ran after kissing my two cheeks.

My eyes looked back at Mama and looked at every eye that pretended not to see me anymore. Mas Wandi's siblings almost all gathered here, it's a pity that Mas Wandi didn't come home this time. So that he can't hear directly what I'm about to say.

"Mama, Kak Yuni, Mas Indra, Mbak Dewi and all of them that Mia could not name one by one. The purpose of Mia coming here today, will no longer cry asking Dika to come home."

Seemed a surprise from everyone. According to my guess they feel winning without a match, must be very unpleasant. There is no spectacle, a crying scene that I will be playing this time. My screams seemed to have been expected. But, they'll be disappointed that I won't let them make me an amusement.

"I mean Mia?" ask Mother Goddess.

"From the beginning I was sure, all this time he was just pretending to be sad separated from his son. Though he must be happy that his son is taking care of him," said Kak Yuni.

Mama was just Silent, it seemed like she regretted having held Dika back all this time. Make Dika as bait. But, I refuse to eat my bait. Disappointment was seen on his face that could not be cheered.

"I'm sorry! Maybe this family will take longer to take care of Dika. Surely you're disappointed you didn't manage to make Dika as bait, to get me back to Mas Wandi."

Everyone was surprised to hear the words I said.

Seriate....

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Glad to accept criticism and advice, new to learning to write, the possibility of many errors in writing and the content of reading. The author is very grateful.

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