Recycling

The Tenth Network

The wind blowing on the moon is quite felt, can be heard two ear holes. Yeah, sitting down and having coffee is a wonderful thing.

It was Jazu and different from me, just drinking a cup of tea. The water is cold.

Meanwhile, the three of them had already left before us. In that place now only left the two of us, for a moment chatting with each other. Earlier I just remembered not asking how Jazu could know I was here? At all, I've never asked a single question. I completely forgot to ask.

“I did not expect, it turns out you are good at guessing my mindset and without any hassle you find my whereabouts here.” I start the conversation with a stale base first.

“And how do you know where I am here? That's accurate once.” I continued talking, asking.

Jazu has not answered. I grinned about to laugh at the look on his face.

“Yes, you're right, friend. I'm smart you know that my mind is clear.”

Jazu seemed to act in front of me with his style and the rhythm of the hand that momentarily followed his speech.

“You are confident. How was your day and why did you decide to this place?”

“Bored, my day is boring.”

“This is the warm news I heard this afternoon, are you bored? That I can't trust.”

I mentioned the afternoon, when it was approaching noon at 10:55. Why do I call it afternoon? Jazu then asked and instead laughed while questioning me am I delirious? I said no, I was just testing his brain.

Jazu laughing. “Trust or not that's the reality. You're mengingau, friend.”

“Ah. Forget about that. Hey, remember.. You didn't answer my question before how did you find out where I was here?”

I reminded him of my previous question. “You hired a shaman to spy on me?” I asked while laughing.

“Du—dukun? Are you crazy?! Try to think about what I'm spying on you for? It was really nothing fortunately, even I lost because I had hired a shaman just to do it.”

Beuh, the look on his face seriously looked at me more sharply. Even now I feel guilty for everything.

“Ya, sorry. I was just kidding.”

Jazu laughing. “I'm the same, man. Just kidding, you're taking my joke too seriously.”

Isn't opposite? Forget it, I don't want to talk about it. “Our joke is absurd like a pastry, without any layer of peanut butter on it.”

I laugh because I'm happy, but it's not funny. Jazu similarly laughed whether it was in what form?

“Nice, brother. You're as wise as anyone I've ever known in a hajj palak stall. But, your laughter can be conditioned a little, do not need to be forced because I know you are pretending to laugh.” Jazu again seriously sipped his coffee.

Now I understand the meaning of his laughter laughing at me.

“Yes, I admit you are good at guessing everything correctly, we are back to the initial topic of conversation, until now you have not answered my question, friend. How do you know where I am here? If with the shaman I asked you to reply to the point is not, then in what way do you know where I am here?”

There are many things that Jazu can make at first that should be short instead of long. Being talked about over and over again with him was not bored. From just that one question alone took us a while in the conversation to finally saying it all.

“Alright, friend. Regarding that question of yours, it's simple that I know you spend a lot of time in this place. You know I've known you for a long time and I know almost everything about you and today is the day I can easily guess you're in this place. Together with them before you chat and share stories. That's a habit in your life that you often do even during leisure time, without any other activities. Is that right, buddy? You know I don't think what's going on with your behavior, man. That's your peculiar characteristic.” Jazu laughing.

However, the sound of his laughter was not loud, like just a smile. Maybe it was just an extra sweetener because he managed to guess easily he said. Okay, fellas. I don't want to talk much at this point.

Jazu grinned steadily. “Heh, you need not be offended by my words, then frown like an asphalt stone, friend.”

“Asphalt face in the middle of that road, black trampled vehicle tire. Full of dust and it feels like no one wants to stand there.” He continued the rant.

“Hah? You said asphalt? Haha.you don't mirror your body. Your weight is still the same, more than a gasoline truck.” I returned it ketus. Inwardly, I do not want to give up on him.

Come on, haphazardly call me asphalt. Where's ada? This is my face if you want to know more handsome than superman on television, you know I used to dream of being a superhero figure flying in the sky. Stretched wings. Eh? Cloak means. Superhero named Superman bravely flies to save people, helping things from just smiles and happiness. That's an old story in a room of imagination.

“Then you aspal it, every day I will step on it with sharp jagged boots under it.” Jazu laughing.

“You will be in pain.” The next is full of laughter. With a pleasant look.

I didn't laugh at all when I heard it, even my ears were heating up. I thought the joke was not funny and was impressed that there was a sadistic element.

“You know most laughs are not good for everyday, he said can make you forget the same important activities.”

“Who said? Can you be sure of the truth and is it all accurate?”

“Yeah, that's what I said. Believe it or not it's a lie, don't be trusted.”

Jazu took his sandals. “This slippers seems like a bad pity, you know I really want to rub these slippers into your face, friend. Let kinclong.”

I laughed and said no. It was also a pity, who would touch my face? Our vocabulary is now throwing at each other. It was all just a joke, not as serious as we met the big boss. In his room at that time we just giggled in fear, there was no laughter and today we had a day off.

In the end we continued to do silly behavior that could attract the attention of people across there. They looked at us like they were astonished. The minute seemed to pass quickly.

An empty bench at this hour. Some office people are busy chatting with their clients in the park.

Maybe there's a task or something else, I don't know. They wear tie suits for a moment rubbing her hair. The air is daytime, though it should be hot. Here, naung is covered by lush garden trees that are lined with large trees. The stall where we are currently chatting is indeed beautiful and experience the natural panoramic atmosphere.

Jazu sipped his coffee again. “Which wisdom are you lying about, friend?”

He said after sipping coffee. “God is Most Merciful, Most Merciful. He gives us a pleasure as comfortable as this, the air blowing sepoi and a sense of peace in our hearts is a form of gratitude we can meet face to face until now.”

“When you feel empty, nothing in your life. That's nothingness. What's empty, man? This life.it's just because you can't be grateful.”

“Ya, that's your talk today.” I answered seriously while taking out the paper and started to record everything.

“For what did you record?” Jazu asked.

“For musings material.”

That's absolutely true. Devotion material when my heart feels empty. Not wrong, in my life sometimes in between the events I went through I often felt empty like feeling depressed, feeling empty and to wander even it felt uncomfortable feeling. Destroyed the streets full of holes that made my vehicle sway and made my head dizzy, tired was sure. Pilot a long distance at the end of the vision there.

I met one of the others who spoke well. “Every human being has sense. They have all the arguments in their head to be able to think and sometimes without a clear mind they can argue anything that is against them. You're the same as them, cowboy. Among the thousands of humans in this desert, you are the most evil human!” One of the cowboys in the desert spoke to me.

The cowboy approached slowly. Trying to smile kindly to one of the dozens of residents of a remote city and the look of a face that was like a split in two that I stood in front of him, I was not interested in talking to him because I did not know him at all.

Uh. Ko—koboijojo's chat. Gosh gosh? This is the caliph, what did I write before? A cowboy? No, mate. This isn't a cowboy story, haduuh, it's not that! Gosh gosh? Wow, fucked balau.

I wanted to sigh, then go back to typing this writing casually.

I want to thank you for everything, none of this is felt, man. This story I wrote for a long time and slowly but surely now enters the tenth series, more leaves. In fact, in a chapter that has passed many things, all of that I never thought in between pieces that I wrote randomly. I muttered alone it could be strung together into an event and tone.

The rhythm nan wanted me to convey to one of the women named Wapta. He's the one I love, the longest explanation in my life.

Like you said you told me I shouldn't give up until now I remember. Right now, I just want to calm my mind and start something new. One of my great enemies once said it too. While fighting him in the hot desert, a cowboy like me dodged quickly whizzing and playing the saddle rope, shouting hiyya out loud with the horse I kept facing him, no matter the sentence of defeat or victory in the war with my strongest enemy.

Ho-ho. I laughed and gosh, I just realized this time even scratching my head, I'm wrong again, man! Pitted. It's grim! This is a mess with the story. Haha ...!

I'm sorry, I'm sorry this is my habit of writing. This is what sometimes amazes me in my life! Wah—wah, surprise.

Okay, fellas. Next time I won't tell that cowboy story again, maybe in the next chapter. May laugh?

Haha.I said relax, don't bother looking at it, don't get angry. Just laugh, man. Hey, didn't I apologize to you? Is that not enough? Huh huh? Not enough?

Talking about the story of the cowboy to get off the track of this storyline and somehow I was happy, happy without feeling burden, such is my reason that sometimes crossed.

I forgot all that, almost a long time ago now I just remember it.

Be it my enemies or friends like you who are by my side, sometimes I just want to defend myself.

In the sense of defense that I want to strengthen because for me all these easy things that do not need to be made complicated.

Hate people will still hate me, about this I don't want many more gazes. Right now I want to start with something a little different.

The script editor who said that day had a point. That's fate! For now and forever I won't argue much with everything he says.

Sorry, I apologize in advance for apologizing for the lurid lines that intertwined in one-third of the bright sheen that pierced through the glass window. There, a man stood looking at me questioning whether you were going to continue something that was not in line with expectations? Isn't that just useless?

It's not so, man. Hope is just a prayer and realizing is a striving self to make it happen. In reality no one can do anything except with the permission of the Owner of Destiny. Man can only plan, the Almighty, for all that determines it.

At some time maybe something will happen at its rate or maybe not at all, just that's hope. Big heads too about vanity is useless. That's what happened in life last time about self-defense from being insulted, about angry gazes and defensive vocabulary when feeling insulted.

Yeah, sorry. All that was over and was left far behind to become a memory in life, bitterness or sweet acid and bitter feet standing before him at that time. The condition of my heart like a stain that looks blackened solid fall into the ground, should be what I think it should not do. Quietly contemplating mistakes is what I need to do at that time, it is true.

I had to bury my dream to become a writer.

I shouldn't argue with a script editor. That's what happened, at the end of the paragraph with the endpoint ending my relationship with him first. Coming out of his room at that moment that felt stuffy by sweat, my heart weakened. My mental defeat was hit by the harsh reality of this life.

The event that ended up being a piece of paper at the end of a black scribble about the astounding thing of my life.

Now in this White Elephant Country, I want to go back to trying to knit that long-standing dream in my life. I was still at the illusory end of the eye, weighing the taste in a pseudo-illusion, stepping on the thorn that hurt in the leg. I am still right on the Southeast Asian continent which is not too far from the point of view of the row of country signage on this continent. The White Elephant Country is the name for Thailand. The land of my mother's birth, the land of my father's meeting with the figure of a woman in a red hood.

Whatever happens before in this life, it is all just a form of past events that have long existed. I want to wave my hand.

Dude, do you know about me until now I haven't been able to prove anything. Even the script editor who hit my script that day. Maybe you're right, man. How hard I tried all that until now I failed to do. Until now the dream still sank deep in the ground.

The words of Jazu who told me to bury the dream of that time until now still imprint me. While those who gave me spirit back then I still remember. Said one of them, as long as I live I still have a lot of time to keep trying and one day everything will be clear, at this time I just have to be sure on the step I started, prove it with all your energy and hope.

Thank you, buddy. Even though I thought I wanted to give up. Until now I have not found a friend or friend in Jazu's narration exactly like them. We used to spend time together chatting.

Enjoy a wonderful day with those special ones. To me they are the best friends I've ever had.

They provide the comfort of exchanging thoughts and are able to create an atmosphere of peace, warmth and fun.

With them talking about things in life with laughter, I think it means more than it does now.

***

“Narak, what's wrong? You're always, as always, late for this college. You need me to teach you a lesson now and in the future so that you can become a disciplined student.”

The lecturer stopped my steps.

I kept staring at him. What is unacceptable is why Martin Sirakanjana was allowed to enter, while only I am the one who now stands and is prevented by him. Hey, I don't know why the reason and the purpose? I don't know, my feelings are silent right now. In fact, I wish I could meet them again my friends first. How it was that I and they spent time together, laughing even though sometimes disagreements and I was angry because of it, but it did not last long in a matter of time.

Missed one of them there.

Not long, man...

Friend or friend in the language spoken by Jazu, do you know this longing is not only about one Wapta, but it is about all, about us.

“This life goes on, Boi. You yourself must be the spirit of living it, never regret this life, because you really never know when you will die, end in this life.”.

“We have heard a lot about how death comes. Some suddenly, some are long or fast have not been able to go to the hospital. Death can happen to anyone, not just parents, he does not look at age, he does not look at anyone, be it an animal. Right now we just have to live this life with confidence, Boi. With confidence about the destiny that has been etched by Him.”

That, man. Your words, which I remember until now in all breaths, sometimes make me contemplate in silence. If I want to know that I have not been able to be consistent in running the day, always breaking what I have set in my personal notebook, a thousand things in this life, sometimes I lean on a tree trunk and over it shade the leaves and I don't want to keep doing this, I don't want any of this to end up alone... Being alone was not my wish all along, but I now feel so lonely and silent like a cell phone with no ringtone and I should be able to accept it.

“Come to my room now!” The lecturer stared at a rather fierce glance. With his thunderous voice I admit to successfully breaking my daydream.

Broken I nodded. The lecturer went ahead of me and along the way to his room. He lectured at length without a sentence break to me, as a stupid student who attended this super-magnificent university I realized I was nobody. Only sand grains are easily blown by the wind. My bus kept silent while listening carefully, obediently, reverent, angry and occasionally in a state of not understanding, without awkward I decided to ask about the purpose of his speech which he mainly uses the language of thai, thai, it's a little hard for me to understand. The foreign language is classified as something that I do not know much, only counted two years ago when I first arrived in the land of the White Elephant and began to live like a normal person in general.

“When do you think someone will die?” Jazu asked while he was on that day, when the others had already left.

There left the two of us talking to each other about something strange in life's problems. Jazu said after one of them mentioned death before. I quietly took a sip of my tea, if I discuss this I feel like dust among wood chips.

“Jawab only, friends.” Jazu continued to speak.

I shook my head lightly. “I don't know the answer.”

Jazu took a more stable breath from the look on his face. “Let me give you one point of view. You need to know this isn't about death in general that you often see and hear, it's about the death of a young man's heart in his life. When do you think someone will die? When you saw the bullet go through his heart? No, when you saw the sword stuck in his stomach? Neither. When will someone die? As his identity disappeared and his spirit faded in time.”

“That is the greatest death for a young man, a friend. Not just young people, but it applies to anyone. That's just one point of view from the person I met last time, there are still some other points of view.” Jazu explained steady with his style.

I chose not to answer or to respond, it was a speech outside my brain that I could not understand.

“But the death I was referring to wasn't absolutely dead forever. It can still be revived. You just have to go back to remembering your good intentions and step up while rebuilding the spirit of your life that once collapsed, fought and determined, do not let your determination die.” Jazu continued to speak.

“You're kidding?” my many.

I did not even comment on his words because he mentioned a wrong example in my view of logic.

I don't know what's behind all that? More so I was reluctant to ask and right now for me it is better to choose not to care much about all that. Jazu was so when the talk was not filtered, as long as it was released without anything else he thought either about me who did not understand or about his words that were annoying when I heard.

Since then and several things in my life. In the end, I chose to be a quiet person. Although sometimes my characteristic known to Jazu is still maintained and I show him.

***

“Narak, did you hear what I just said? Often I pay attention to you and you as usual, daydreaming like that.” Lecturer staring.

Through his words my daydream scattered and fell apart like a bunch of tangled threads on the floor, like a divorced cloud slowly disappearing on the surface of the sky. Dramatic. In short, the daydream disappeared from my head.

Even now it feels like my feet are not felt. I held my head lightly like a blank plong, letting out memories between broken pieces of glass and eaten sandwiches, empty glasses stirred. It makes a sound that feels like it's in my head, feels like it's real in front of my eyes.

“If my previous question made you uncomfortable, don't think about it, forget about it for a moment. and calm your mind.” The lecturer spoke while opening the door of his tightly closed room.

The two of us now arrived at a special room of hers. As usual, the battle was over. He sat in the chair of his pride who had been struggling to build students and students who he taught, far too noble position of a lecturer sitting in front of me. I respect you without saying much.

Noble in without quotation. He's a teacher and I'm just a student.

“Narak, the reason why I forbid you from entering the lecture hall is not to scold you or to lecture. Not that, right now I just want to know the truth of yourself. There are actually a lot of things I want to ask you why lately you've been daydreaming a lot, like a person who's run out of passion for life and you go to college like a sleep person without looking at anyone, some other students feel uncomfortable.”

“As a lecturer at this university I guarantee and supervise everything. Giving you one chance to explain is what I'm waiting for, it's good to be bad as long as you never lie before me.”

“Many students are curious about your attitude. Amongst them there is no one to focus on, it is all your fault because of the negative aura within you that is strong. I can see that the students are always waiting for you to smile for one time in the sense of seeing you happy and it feels like you've never even looked at anyone, busy with yourself. Today, what do I see is different, Narak? You walk with a student. You walk and talk. On that page, I saw that you also looked familiar and joked with him. Can you explain all that? This is a college place, not a dating place, you should know!”

“The student is just my friend.” I answered according to his importance.

“Sit.” Lecturer.

Slowly pestering. I sat in front of him with a look down.

“You know, Narak. A college degree is not important, what matters is discipline and you can be good morals.” The lecturer begins to exhale.

I was silent waiting for the long talk he was going to speak to me.