Recycling

Story in the Plane

Some memories sometimes come uninvited. Sometimes it comes cruelly, disturbing the feeling that was originally calm to be no muddle as if piercing the wound so deeply.

I'm daydreaming for a few times. It happens to me often, I can't deny it or deny it. Maybe that's what's become a habit, rooted into a characteristic of me that I can't control.

A young man like me was only able to look down, looking down with a face that might look sad, I do not know for sure because near me there is no mirror that can see the expression of my face now, but I know feelings are the key behind the look of the face.

But even so, it is not always so. Because in this world, there are people who are strong, they are the people who can display a smiling face, if his heart is torn as if to suffer, crying in the mind that no one will ever know how painful it is.

I was like casting a shadow of a long-ago past. Imagine something that is not clear in my memory. In fact, everything seems vague I find it difficult to define in a simple description.

The plane that is now flying takes me to Thailand is increasingly making me continue to imagine, remembering the past is increasingly painful, the, although sometimes there are lines of words in the form of quotations from the past that I have experienced, only very few among the thousands of memories that come to give wisdom.

Most of the memories that come even haunt my feelings as if a voice whispering with an erratic rhythm. I clearly heard it. Heavy near my ears, I carry on my back feeling tired.

“Young man, what's your name?” Suddenly someone wearing a black suit sitting next to me greeted and asked. He broke my reverie.

I looked over, looking at the person who had originally asked about the name.

“My name is Narak.” I answer casually.

The man held out a tanga, I welcomed a smile. “Include, my name is Aiban.” With a face like she was looking at me.

We met each other with smiles. Aiban Daritadi seemed to be watching me as if I was guessing trying to find out what was on my mind.

Then I decided to ask about Aiban's age, “How old do you have?”

“Now I live 40 years,” replied Aiban quickly with a smile.

I was a little surprised to hear it because I had just entered the plane and sat down. I thought Aiban was 35 years old or less, his face did not look like 40 years old. The possibility of a pattern of life that is awake and that makes it ageless. Not bad, I'd better not guess the other person's age from his face. Everyone is different, there are those who call someone's face depending on the profession, whether it is true or not? I don't know, the point is next time I don't have to guess someone else's age.

In my mind I hope my face does not look moody and does not look dreamy. Because I always think of something heavy. So, it's natural that this daydream often happens to me and I find it hard to control.

“Actually since daritadi I noticed you. Why do you look so moody?” ask Aiban.

I was shocked to hear that I was wrong at the time. He has been watching my face ever since. Gosh gosh? How'this?

It is true what I thought before, it turns out that my facial expression depends on feeling. Hopefully at other times I can train when I feel sad, my face still smiles.

“Nothing, somehow maybe destiny has been etched this way,” I said messily. I said it without hesitation.

Aiban patted my shoulder. “Tell me that. You don't have to be ashamed to tell it, said the person with the hidden problem if you don't tell it, it will only make you depressed and the problem will further disturb your feelings.”

“It's okay, I'm just daydreaming now, look at my eyes. I'm fine,” I said showing a face, but these eyes seem not to want to be invited to work together.

My tears seemed to be spilling, I quickly looked up a little, holding back the tears from coming out.

May Aiban see me not expecting anything else, may she not know that I am holding back tears, hiding deep feelings of sadness. Thankfully, I saw that he was silent and didn't seem to be asking about it.

“What are your destinations to Thailand?” ask Aiban and thank God he seems to have paid no attention to what I said before.

I answered him steadily, explained my purpose to Thailand is just a walk, understanding in my mind, I did not lie because later when looking for grandfather's address, of course I walk, I will walk, I can understand it's the same with the streets. That is, if reason seeks a solution out of me who does not want to honestly say it.

I just answered the question, not back to ask about Aiban's purpose to Thailand. I weigh the words, exactly for what purpose do I ask? To me it doesn't matter.

Aiban looked at me in a rage. He seems to have taken seasonal holidays, school holidays, work holidays as well. Young people like me need a vacation.

I guessed his expression. He opened his bag for a moment. “My destination went to want to meet my old friend there.” He told me his own purpose, but I didn't ask. He took out a picture with a friend.

I stared for a moment. “We have not seen each other for a long time, there are many stories that have passed with him, memories with him are never timeless,” Aiban continued to explain to me.

“Oh, so. May I call you uncle?” I asked Aiban. Because I feel disrespectful when I talk about names or so forth.

“Alright, please. I'd rather be so, showing the manners of a young man,” said Aiban further praising me. I don't care about her compliments and I don't need to add how she praises me.

“Oh, yes. Where does that uncle's friend live?” manya curious.

“He lives in Bangkok. The capital of Thailand, he works there, he previously invited me to work there but I still chose to work in my own country,”, Aiban explained to me.

“Because I love this country, it feels too hard to part with the homeland where I was born,” Aiban explained to me again.

Hearing him I was a little amazed by the figure of Aiban, the admiration made me powerless to hold myself to stare while widening a smile, “Uncle, I admire you who love this country.”

“Do not admire me young man, I have no achievements, a figure like me do not need to admire.” I could stare at the figure of Aiban who was sort of aware that he did not deserve to be admired, even he humbled himself in front of me. On the other hand, I do not know the achievements of others.

“Don't talk like that, uncle should be excited.” I smiled, I could only do that.

I saw that Aiban seemed to thin his lips as he said; “Can you encourage yourself, young man?”

I was silent, unable to answer. Long before, I was always devastated by grief. Look, yesterday. Mandris who gave me spirit, I was almost always drained of spirit.

The words of Aiban that I heard were like sharp knives that pierced right into the heart, perhaps that was the real purpose of why Aiban humbled himself and said he had no achievements, the kind of satire he had spoken.

Aiban laughed at me who was silent, not answering. “You think too much of my words, never mind, forget that, you admire me for loving this country, that's good. May you also love this country sincerely,” said Aiban patting me on the shoulder.

Slowly I smiled again, a glimmer of hope as if it had started to appear and flow like water, looking as bright as a light emanating in the midst of the gripping darkness of the night.

I realize that in some parts of the world there are indeed some categories that cannot be interpreted through delivery.

I wish I could have endured it with millions of beauties, but that beauty has vanished in my life. In fact, the day passed always accompanied those nights of silence with a solitude I could not explain.

Our conversation continued until Aiban gave me a sentence that was not long, but it made my mind calm, the sad feeling began to disappear from me.

However it happened, I couldn't resist the feeling of sadness when things were haunting as if the obstacle was stretched wide before me. This connection with the reality of the self-unable understands the situation, forcing me to endure longer in an insensitive desire.

I often jolted the wishful thinking that unconsciously appeared indifference as if showing a falsehood that now engulfs my inner bonds and feelings.

At that time Aiban told me about a young figure, Bung Tomo in Surabaya who had determination and a burning spirit, even through takbir he raised the spirit of the surobayo arek against the allied army. At that time, the fire of spirit rose sharply from the speech of Bung Tomo.

I once read that story in the book Bung Tomo, Life and Death of Combat Spirit Enhancer 10 November by Abdul Waid. It feels like now I suddenly miss reading the text of Bung Tomo's speech.

I was one of those who admired the figure of Bung Tomo. In fact, this self seemed to get excited when reading his story. Even today, Aiban told me, it was as if I was watered with a sense of nationality and a burning spirit rose again.

After telling a long story, Aiban smiled at my situation, at that time I also looked back at him smiling. We both smiled at each other. The story on this plane really made me feel the vibrations that destroyed the palace of grief.

Istina locked me in a prison of terrible despair.

Aiban came like a hero who helped me. I am more like an eagle falling on a tree branch. Aiban came to free me. I flew freely in the sky, screeched happily in the air, then flapped my wings thanks to him.

***

A few hours passed quickly. Aiban told a long story to fill our time during the flight to Thailand.

I took a breath for a moment. “Uncle, does uncle have wife?” I asked briefly, I don't know why I was suddenly curious. My words just came out. Oh my God, did I ask you wrong? At that moment I saw Aiban choking on my words, is it possible that Aiban has not married at all.

Maybe he is not married, always struggling and focused on the things he wants to achieve until he does not think of getting married.

Well, it seems I was too presumptuous to ask, Aiban seemed silent. He's not talking, lest he get mad at me. May he understand me, since long ago I often throw words without thinking first, the purpose of thinking is to weigh the speech itself, whether it is worth me to say or not.

Maybe, that's what I have to reduce, I have to learn more in the future so that speaking without a thought can be strengthened. Really, I'm sorry.

“My wife at the end of the night darkness.”

Eh? Aiban answered. Obviously, when I heard it, I was confused as to what he meant. At that time, I was quite happy, Aiban laughed, I also laughed as a diversion.

Our conversation ended until the plane landed, almost all the way through the flight we talked about something that had no meaning.

Maybe so-called introductions, just a word of speech, but Aiban tells a story that now I remember, the figure of Bung Tomo will always be a hero that I continue to like. He is a hero who has burned the spirit of the fighters in Surabaya against the allied army.

When on the plane, Aiban told me more details and exciting until now I still remember it. Then, the two of us split up together when it made a goal as an excuse.

Aiban patted me on the shoulder, sending me a message; “Be a useful young man. At least you are useful to yourself, a simple example you have the fighting spirit of the nation and your homeland.”

That was Aiban's message before we both separated. The vice beside me just silently listened, he seemed to not understand how we met as if really familiar, even very inconceivable that we had just met, talking only in the plane.

Thankfully, I met a person like Aiban who was able to raise my spirits back, my feelings of sadness had disappeared, now it felt more refreshing.