Recycling

Football Players

Do you know what people feel when they are nervous? Then I don't have to explain.

I can't really explain all that. I admit there are many things in this world that I cannot explain in more detail about this, not just about love.

Right now I was walking nervously tightly holding the backpack I was wearing one hand and the other was left untied. Yeah, I can't describe it further. I can only give a little explanation.

My legs were walking as usual then momentarily turned my eyes toward grandfather at a glance with a fast-beating heart condition. I hope Grandpa doesn't laugh.

I hope he doesn't laugh at it.

Inwardly I said all sorts of things about the look on my face, what is it like now? I bitterly tried to smile with the terrible shock and inner turmoil that made me bounce to the distant nun planet there, in the middle of nowhere. Crashing again in the sea of waves about my inability to stare at others longer.

Shift a moment's glance towards my vehicle at a glance. It was an old vehicle, given by my grandfather when I first arrived in the land of the White Elephant, the country that took me around the place. To and fro exploring.

With that vehicle first. Through the rice fields. Looking up at the blue sky and exclaiming in excitement. It was like being clear in the middle of a football field and I was busy dribbling the opposing team, I kicked it to score.

The crowd cheers were dramatic. Rice plants swayed accompanied by the rhythm of monza. I prayed with warm eyes and outstretched hands.

Driving while having fun, it seemed like it was a pleasure, without wanting to say more about sadness. This is not the actual reality, but rather I like to write with many things that sometimes do not connect.

But it's all true and that's the past, man. The past is filled with imagination.

Imagination is present. Imagine myself as a football player. Yeah, that story's pretty long, man. The first story I liked was football.

Right on today, Monday. I'll retell it briefly and not along the longest bridge in the world. The Bang Na Expressway. That is the name of the bridge is in this city, in this country which is nicknamed the Land of White Elephants.

Actually I always miss that disconnect, with an imagination that does not just stay in place. Football players will not stay in place.

Soccer players are more free to dribble the ball they are good at scoring faster. Some are slow, others do not print at all. Football players remind me of one of those guys named Sajak.

Been long. The whirling wind in the hall of the field, sweat sweat was splattered and it reminded me of the class. Confused what I did.

Rhyme whistling. “I like this.”

I laughed at him. “What you like is different with me.”

“Iya.”

“Oh, yes. Another year we graduated from this Elementary School, all this time I don't know. What are your goals, man?” ask her.

In the sixth grade of SD. The teacher's voice in the next class was heard. In class we were empty of hours of study.

“Cita-citaku?” He stayed for a moment. Looking up, staring at the ceiling of the classroom which was above there was a fan.

He pointed shortly. “You saw that fan, that's my goal.”

“Eh. What do you mean?” I was surprised to hear his words. “I don't understand what you mean and what's the connection between that fan and your ideals?” manya curious.

The laugh slowly. “Don't focus on the fan, but you should focus on the shape. Imagine that fan is a match light on a football field and this classroom is the field. Since long ago I wanted to be a soccer player, that was my goal.”

“That's why I want to be an ambassador in America there, you can see it back like a fan on top of that. Regarding the form that has the same gap and similarity with the ambassador's office in America.” Sajak explained with a superfantastic look on his face.

I don't know how he could have a picture in his mind of a football game lamp and imagine a classroom is his field. Imagine the ambassador's office in America there all of which is just staring at the fan.

I don't understand his words at all. My age at the time was not like her tenacious self. I can see he plays ball a lot and memorizes English vocabulary.

Where is Sajak now? I don't know, I haven't known since I graduated from SD. He had disappeared without news and did not tell me where he was going next in hopes of continuing to learn until he reached the ideals that day he explained by just pointing at the fan. He moved out of the house and left everything behind, and then the simple question went somewhere? Even the neighbors near his house do not know where to move, such as lost in the wind. Reportedly not heard anymore.

Until now, I could only sigh for her umpteenth of a second. It was as if one by one the people near me had left for no reason.

Yeah, I've always missed that time, a time when it was more free to talk smoothly like a freeway from potholes and other obstacles. Tap the gas full with my feelings that at that time still prioritize safety.

I felt it up to High School. That was the end of everything that now makes me a book reader and quiet. Don't forget, I love football.

It's the rhyme that makes me know football is not just about winning or losing, but it's about friendship and struggle.

That's the past, man

And that's the past

The past where I used to drive. Shouting with outstretched hands. The rice is green as long as the eye can see

The past where I and Wapta met a long time ago, getting a temporary job at a freight forwarder

I let out a breath. Getir walked with a feeling of nervousness like a thorn in the foot to make me not the power to stand stronger. Be patient? Yes, I can be patient, be strong.

Black car there. Uupps ... in front of me is still looking faithful waiting. Iron things can't walk on their own, everyone knows that. The black-clothed man who had walked before me had entered his car.

This is what I feel now, my hands are numb. If asked to choose. I will choose to go alone in my vehicle, without having to bother dealing with nervous feelings.

However, I must be able to accept everything that is now happening like a confident and passionate footballer kicking a round object that the opposing team is trying to seize.

That football, also the air pressure particles there, cheers to kicks that whimper up to score for the umpteenth of hope and prayer that is offered. The crowd cheers enlivened.

Applause. Yeah, I'm a football player, Sajak. You know the memory of you I still remember today about the ball and a glimpse of the ideals and spirit that you have. You're the word-bender with a splash of nonsense.

Hopefully between the breath and the struggle during it can make us meet again, Sajak.

The meeting and the farewell turned out to be two things I knew were always between these lives. Between me and my best friend. Both the Rhyme that had been lost in my sight and Jazu who was with me in the coffee shop had laughed at the script I had made.

Yeah, it was the second moment that was memorable as if giving a response about my purpose so far. Jazu's different. He has moved from the world of today to a realm I cannot explore. I can only pray for him, may he be there to get a position in a noble place.

And to me the most painful parting was between me and the one I loved. Who her?

Wapta is the one I love. We don't ask each other now and I don't want to ask them in the mail.

Only on that day did my words and words of forgiveness soar into the sky and the sending of a letter that I found it very difficult to write. He deserves to be happy with others and it's not me who really can't do anything, can only miss him with paragraphs that can say just a streak of lies.

Because there are some people who think in this world about the word someone writes, all of it is only used as a sweetener tongue spoken he said, while the action is the real love.

Yeah, that's not wrong. But, unlike me and regarding my words this is not a lie. I'm the only one who can't prove it. Wait, wait while this article is able to make you believe that all that was in the depths of my feelings was you, Wapta.

I even wrote a couple of verses in your diary at that time. Do you know, some of the temples I wrote wearyly imagining your face like a bright moon in the night sky.

This is the temple;

Missing a streak of memories and love

This love is only for him

To him

Which is far away there

Just him ....

Just about him ....

Always and always ....

Even though things are no longer the same. Between me and Wapta has been separated for a long time, reconciled with each other and maybe he has chosen his way of life. The best way of life.

With a pleased look I tried to throw away all sorts of thoughts, sighing deeply. This longing will forever remain in the depths of my feelings. The deepest part of all that I have felt and experienced from the past until now.

Thank you for everything. About the memories, hopes, loves and longings that have filled my days.

Greetings, Football Players.