Rainbow Cloud

Chapter 15's

I kept crying in my room. I can't believe what I just heard. I don't want to believe it.

Grandma opened my door and forced her in. I hid under the covers, not wanting to see anyone. I just want to go to sleep and hope it's all a nightmare I'll forget when I open my eyes.

“Gis,” granny sitting next to me. “Gisel,” grandma calls me again.

I let my sobs answer. Grandma stroked my head gently like a parent who was going to put her child to bed. But I knew grandma wouldn't let me sleep. He wants to talk to me.

“Did Reza explain everything to you?”

I popped my head out from under the blanket. “Grandmother knows?”

Grandma nodded. “Since when?”

“Since you saw rainbow clouds.”

That one sentence made me understand Grandma's strange demeanor that day. I understand the sadness in his eyes. Understand the hidden meaning of his words.

“This island people believe in the legend of rainbow clouds. Although not many have seen it, some people are blessed with the gift of seeing it. Like you.”

“I don't want this gift. I don't need this miracle,” my screams.

“Receiving it is not easy. But all who experienced it, in the end they thank you for it happening. Although painful, at least they can do what they want. At least they can escape one regret.”

“I don't want to, Grandma. I don't want to lose them,” I hugged grandma and cried hard.

“You haven't lost them. Don't lose hope. Grandma always wishes you all the best.”

“What does Grandma mean? Isn't it currently they've..” I can't continue my words.

Grandma breathed. “Gis, you know the origin of the legend of rainbow clouds?” I certainly shook my head. “Conon, once on this island only lived a couple lovers. The wife always waits alone at home when the husband goes sailing. One day the husband had an accident and was adrift at sea and on the threshold of death. He could not bear to remember his wife who was waiting without knowing the news. He did not expect to see his wife again. He only hoped that his wife knew that he would not come back and stop waiting, continuing his life. His prayer was heard and his soul returned to the island. He said that he would not be able to return and they spent the rest of the time they had both. Of course the wife was sad when she knew her husband would not return, but she also realized that the miracle happened because the husband loved her so much. So the wife stayed on the island and prayed that souls like her husband could be heard praying. The wife also became the guardian of this island and ensure souls like her husband can come to the island and spend the rest of the time without regrets.”

“So, they are indeed.” My tears are back flowing profusely.

“No, Gis. The story doesn't stop there. The end of the story is that they are both unhappy. But not everyone who experiences it ends up like that. Although few, some get happy endings and reunite. Grandma wishes that miracle happened to you.”

“So, grandma mean..”

“Grandma don't know what happened to them now, but you mustn't lose hope. Pray that they will come back to you.”

After getting a glimmer of hope, I was able to breathe a sigh of relief. Whatever happens, I pray I can still see the miracle again.

“Why didn't they tell me right away? Grandma too. Why didn't grandma tell me?”

I know it won't change their situation. But at least I can give them more time. And I'll listen to them more. There are many things I would do differently if I knew everything.

“Grandmother didn't say anything because it was their decision. You should appreciate it. They do not arbitrarily decide it even though grandma does not know for sure their consideration.”

I try to understand everything and more importantly, I know I don't have much time with them. I don't want to spend it being constantly angry at them.

“Now, you have to meet them. It is also not easy for them.”

Grandma took me out of the room. I just followed him. I'm still too weak to fight Grandma. Okay, I want to meet them too.

“Gis, forgive us,” they've been waiting at my room door.

“Why didn't you guys tell me right away?”

“I don't know how to tell you. I still don't believe it either. And I'm afraid of what would happen if we couldn't see each other again. That's why I don't want to date you and I want you to let me go. I just hope you won't find out until the end. I didn't expect you to fall for Reza.”

“Hmm, I told you I was satisfied because you forgave me. And I don't plan on saying this because I feel it's Brother Andre's duty. I even plan to give you as much time as possible so that there is no need for regrets. I really don't want to hurt you anymore.”

I folded my hands on my chest and looked at the two of them. Even though I look silly with swollen and red eyes, they feel even more guilty despite having their own reasons for hiding it to me. I wanted to get angry and cry looking at them but I felt my last tears had come out.

“I'm still upset that you guys are hiding it. Don't you know now the rest of our time is less than a week?”

“Maybe less than that,” Brother Andre interrupted me. I felt all the energy leaving my body to hear it. Both of my arms fell to the side.

“What does Sister mean?” my voice vibrates.

“The night before we dated. I felt the rest of our time was less than that so I decided to help you accept your feelings before it was too late.”.

I felt helpless but fortunately the man who told me this secret managed to hold me in time. I'm sure I'll miss that warmth if it doesn't end as I expected. I don't want to miss him.

“You can still pray for one more miracle,” grandma interrupts our sorrow-filled silence. “But you must be prepared to provide the same reciprocity.”

“What's the return balance like?” the man who hugged me immediately responded. From his tone, I can capture his desire to return to me. He would do anything to come back to me and it warms my heart.

“I don't know. Nothing is certain about that. Grandma lost a baby in Grandma's womb and can no longer have children. But Grandma doesn't mind being able to enjoy 40 years longer with Grandma's husband.”

“T-tung-wait. Grandma also saw rainbow clouds?” I don't believe what I'm hearing. I don't remember Grandma's words. I could only digest that it turned out that grandma also saw the cloud and experienced the same miracle as me.

Grandma just nodded. Since I know someone who gets a happy ending from a rainbow cloud, I increasingly wish I would have the same miracle. I wish I had my happy ending too.

I no longer expected the end of stories like the ones my parents always told me about. I didn't expect the white riding prince to come and declare love to me. I don't expect a happy ending forever. I have not long expected perfection.

Just one more miracle. I just want them to come back to me. My happy ending is enough to see them again.

“If there is a possibility of that, I am willing to pay anything for them to return,” I said with full confidence. I would do anything for that happy ending.

But the man firmly said, “I am also willing to accept any consequences, but not if something happens to you.”

“Iya, Gis. I also don't want you to bear the consequences.”

“Then what?! You guys prefer to leave me?!”

I don't want to hear anymore. How could they have told me to give up when there was a chance that the two of them would survive. I might see them again.

I no longer need a white riding prince or a guardian angel. I just need them back to my side. Why don't they understand that?

“Select one person. Choose the one person you really want. Perhaps your prayers will be more heard,” the man continued our conversation in a very emotional way. I can't really choose one of them. And I would rather not choose the reality that is before me. Why doesn't he understand that?

If I had to choose the person I love and sacrifice others, I couldn't do it. I'm sure those who easily say they will choose one person and sacrifice another will not choose easily if faced with reality like me. They just play while I'm serious.

I really hate that question. Back then, I cursed the people who perpetuated the game. I hope it's just a game and I don't really have to make a decision. But that's my reality.

No, I'm not gonna make a decision. I want them both. It's up to people to call me greedy. I just know I can't sacrifice anyone between them. I don't want to sacrifice anyone.

“I want you both. I can choose who I love, but I want you both back. I need you both in my life.”

“But, Gis. What Reza said is true. There may be a reason why we both came. Maybe this is the reason.” Brother Andre as if he just realized the way the man's mind and agreed with him.

I let go of the hug that saved me because that very second, it made me unable to breathe. That's really unfair. If I have to choose one person among them because my heart is only able to fill one person, then I do not need love.

I don't mind if they don't love me anymore. I don't mind if I don't love them either. I don't even mind if we split up and live each other's lives. I just want them to live in the same world as me.