My Sacrifice is worthless

Fire and Water

I honestly could not hear Nur's words. I can't bear to leave him. I wish I could bring him along, but my father and grandmother couldn't allow it. I have to discuss this matter with Tok Bah. Maybe he has a way out.

In the past, we promised never to part. My mother also advised, never separate us if Mom is not. But now, Fitri is gone first. Should I leave Nur? I couldn't imagine what would happen to him.

"Son doesn't know what to answer, Nur. We'll see you later, okay?" amuckoo.

"Yes, we're asleep. Don't forget to read the prayers of sleep and prayer for those we care about" I said.

***

The next day Tok Bah came to pick me up. It feels heavy to put this leg. However, we must keep moving for sure for a dream. Never stop chasing him until the dream becomes certain.

My family is not from an educated family. Dad's only up to second grade, so is Mom.

"Liar poor, just don't be stupid. Let only us not be able to read as long as you stay in school, maybe a pen will be a friend at the table" she said. That motivates me to this day.

"Are you ready, Ta? Let's go," take Tok Bah.

I paid my parents a favor. Although there will never be a warm hug from them to let go of me

"Sister, don't be long gone," whined Nur.

"Yes, I promise."

I forced a smile for her, at least there was hope even though I couldn't bring a smile on her face.

We slowly left the house. Home of a million memories from my childhood. With Mom and Fitri.

Once, we had no home, we hitched a ride in a small warehouse on the river bank a few hundred meters from our current home. There was no bed, no bathroom, and no room. If you want to sleep, just sleep. If you want to take a shower, we use a pull and bathe on the river bank. The water here is black, sometimes turning white if the drought is long and salty, because the distance of the sea is only 5 km from our residence. A warehouse, which we call home.

Back then, I was still alone with Fitri. Mom, save up little by little to build our house, our little palace. From the results of the odd jobs of father and mother who help in the fields of others. We used to hitch a ride at my uncle's house, my grandmother's oldest brother. We slept in the kitchen with pandan mats woven by our mother. We were forced to hitchhike because the warehouse we were in collapsed when the rainstorm hit. We were forced to evacuate. I don't remember where Grandma was.

Our house was standing when our sister's pregnant mother, Nur. Nurjannah means the light of heaven. With that name, I hope to be the light in our family. Finally we moved even though there was no electricity, still using torch fire from kerosene. However, Fitri and I are happy at least do not need to hitchhike here and there. Before long, grandma set up a house next to our house. Grandma can install electricity from PLN and we enjoy the electricity with a record of having to pay every month.

It starts with endless drama. Grandma who often quarreled with my step-grandfather and my mother. There was a mistake in Grandma's eyes. Even the grandmother accused, Mother seduced her husband. My mother just kept quiet, I don't understand. Mom says "The fire won't go out if the opponent fires. So be water as cool as dew that calms the fire from its flames,"

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Pov Mom

🍒🍒🍒

I'm Anna. I knew him when he visited my village. That night there was a music show we called jonggan. The event is held if there is a wedding or gratitude because the harvest is abundant.

I was helping my aunt at a stall selling food and drinks. That night, quite a lot of people were present to enjoy the event.

"Mba, make it three ice," he ordered.

"You want ice what bang?"

"Es green beans waja," he added with a smile. A very sweet smile and I returned that smile bashfully.

"It's the ice bang," say put the ice on the table.

"How many stews, Mba?"

He and his friends ate the corn while chatting. Sometimes he glances at me.

"May you know his name, Mba?" tanyakanya.

"Anna, you?" shyly answer.

"I, Adi. What a beautiful name. How am I just seeing you now, huh? I often watch jonggan here," he explained.

"Yes, I just got back from town. Long time working there."

"Oh .. so. Worth it," she smiled.

We chatted casually that night. The night was late and the show was almost finished. He said goodbye and promised tomorrow night would come again because the event would take place for three nights in a row.

"So who's Na?" ask aunt.

"Damn, Bi. I stopped by here to drink and eat corn" I replied.

"For so long she's here, lest she have a crush on you, Na?" search aunty.

"Ah, there's no way Bi, we're new to it" I explained.

"Yes, auntie just wanted to say be careful. Not alone, right? Aunty is afraid you're being here. You know, our customary laws are still thick here?"

"Yes Bi. I understand," I replied. Here, customary law is still used for people who violate societal norms. However, there are still many who violate it and almost every week here held the customary law. They have to provide our typical cut animals, pay customary fines and much more.

Tonight was a lot of visitors. Aunty and I were busy serving the buyer. So I realized he had been sitting in my stall long enough. Auntie went inside to eat.

"It's been a while, Bang?" my many.

"From now on, I don't want to interfere with your work. Don't you want to watch?" tanyakanya.

"I have to look after my Auntie's shop, Bang. Besides, I'm tired of having to stand in a crowd" I explained.

"Oh ... Then same dong."

"Come here if you don't like watching?"

"To meet you," he replied timidly.

My face was red with shame. She smiled at me. Do I like it?

"May I be close to you?" whispered.

"Bring your parents here to propose to her," Aunt answered suddenly.

Adi seemed to think for a while while looking down. Does he mind my aunt's request? If yes, I doubt it. Maybe he was just trying to play games with me. Adi raised her head and looked at me, I immediately turned my gaze in another direction.

"Alright, Bi. Give me a week to bring my parents here" he replied.

I'm so glad to hear that. I guess he'll step down after hearing Aunt's request. Bibi said she would wait for her family to propose to me. He was very pleased with me and Aunt.

"Wait for me, huh? I'll come with my family" he said gently.

I just nodded in agreement with it.

💜💜💜