My Sacrifice is worthless

I Don't Want Durhaka

The third day of Fitri's departure. We'll meet her house. His eternal home will be our home. Pilgrimage reminds us of death, that nothing is eternal. Rich, poor, even kings cannot afford a life.

The ground was still red, the scent of pandan still smelled the air, the flowers withered slightly exposed to the sun. However, these tears are unceasingly taking me on a journey into the past, remembering the good times with them, Mother and Fitri.

Arriving at home, have been waiting for some police officers and jihias raya. Return to wound.

"Please enter Sir. Sorry to wait so long, we're from the grave of the deceased" explained father.

"Yes sir, it's okay, we understand."

"How's my son's case progressing, sir?"

"Suspecting to get 3 months in jail, sir. That's with assurance, '" the officer explained.

"I leave everything to the authorities, sir. I just want the law to be enforced as fair as possible" said Dad.

"Good, Sir. We understand, we here also want to explain the procedure of the life insurance of the father."

I don't want to listen to what they're talking about anymore. Hearing the word money, my heart hurts. I hate that money. My brother was replaced by some money from irresponsible people, even the land transport truck that hit my sister didn't know where it was. May Allah repay what is planted.

"When did you go home to your Bah Tok?" ask grandma.

"After seven days, Grandma" I replied.

"Don't you want to go to school here?" ask grandma suddenly.

"Your father wants you to transfer schools here after the money's gone,"

"But Grandma, I don't want to use that money. Not my right, should use it for more important things like giving almarhumah name," I looked.

"Don't teach me. I know what to do, you follow your father's orders. Why give alms? When you're hungry, does anyone feed you? Is it when we're having a hard time that someone extends their hand for us??" sergeant grandma.

"Even the worms in the ground have their sustenance, Nek, God, who rules over everything" I answered.

"Talking to you is not going to have an end, it is good at lecturing parents," he sauntered out.

I can only take a deep breath, trying to stay sane in this matter. I don't want to enjoy that money at all. And to get back here, I was so scared. Not because of my parents' attitude but fear of being an ungodly child.

***

The 7-day event of Fitri's departure went smoothly. Many relatives and neighbors came. They do not come empty handed, some carry rice, sugar and even envelopes for the host. Helps to ease the burden of the disaster.

Tomorrow I'm going back to Tok Bah's house. I was out of school for a week. Many lessons are left behind.

"Tomorrow, Brother wants to go back there?" tanya Nur lirih's.

"Yes, Nur. Brother has to go to school. You also have to stay in school, remember the message of Kak Fitrimu, one of us should be able to be that person. Make them proud Nur," I said.

"Schooler's just here huh? I'm afraid I'm gonna have to face Dad and Grandma alone. Usually there is Kak Fitri come home once a week, but if ita brother is long?" nur Rajuk.

I was confused, confused to make a step.