Materialistic

49-al-waqiah

"He had run fast to reach his Jannah, but I was still crawling slowly far behind him. Should I be his companion? And is heaven still willing to take a servant like me?"

the Adara Mikhayla Siregar

•••

After the evening prayer Arda did not let me go back to sleep and chat with a mattress and a thick blanket, he invited me to read the Qur'an. He said while waiting for the dawn time to come, so that the free time we have can be a little useful and produce rewards. Reading one letter only rewards 10, what else if you can read a juz of the Qur'an, or better yet circumcise, memorize, and practice it. I don't know how much reward you will get.

"What letter did you read?" ask me on the sidelines of the event we are doing. Arda read one verse and I followed it, and so on. My limitations that have not been so able to read the Qur'an do not make Arda out of sense.

His forehead is a little wrinkled. "You mean the letter that I just read at tahajud prayer?" her question confirmed, and I immediately nodded with certainty.

"Sura Al-waqiah" he answered with a pull on both corners of the lips.

"Al-waqiah Letter?"

Arda nodded and said, "Surat Al-waqiah is the 56th letter in the 27th juz. In this letter of Al-waqiah there are 96 verses, you know why it is called the letter of Al-waqiah?" the question was that I immediately replied with a belt.

"It is called the letter of al-waqiah because it corresponds to the first verse, namely, al-waqiah which means doomsday." He stopped his explanation. The two neutrals stared warmly at me who was displaying a face of shock, full of fear. The apocalypse?

"The contents of the letter tell of how the day of resurrection will be and also the recompense of the believers and the infidels" he said. I was shivering with fear. Infidels? Am I in it too?

Without being asked he explained what was now lodged in my head. "In language, kafir comes from the word kufur which means covering up the truth, violating the truth that has been known and ungrateful. The plural of kafirun is kaafirun or kuffar." Hearing that made my mouth shut without a sound. I belong in it. I always break His rules when I know them. The rumbling in my chest was racing fast, the fear was rising to the surface.

"Why are you, Adara?" it was a sloppy thing that I only responded with a view that was difficult to interpret.

"What do you want to do?" coined. I was confused between fear and curiosity. But after a few seconds of silence, my head finally nodded in doubt.

"In addition there is also information about the creation of man, fire, and all kinds of plants that also explain the power of God and the resurrection day is true.  To think and be ignorant of His creation will add our faith to God. Therefore Allah ta'la calls upon man to reflect on his creations." Arda closed his explanation with a thin snippet.

"Is there anything you want to ask?" he continued after he closed the Mushaf Qur'an then kissed him, and put the holy book on the nightstand.

"What does the last word you read mean?" ask me to the point. It was the only question that filled my brain, and I wanted to know the answer immediately.

"Innahum kaanuu qobla zaalika mutrofiin wa kaanuu yushirruuna 'alal-hinsil-'azhiim. You mean this one?" I drifted back in her sweet voice. My heart was pounding violently at the chanting of verse by verse that he read. His reading and voice were able to sedate me for a while ahead.

"You're not lying to me anymore, are you?" Arda shook his head and one of his hands reached back to the Qur'an that he had saved. He opened it and before long he handed the Mushaf to me.

My eyes are perfectly rounded when reading the letters per letter listed nicely there. My hands were shaking, my eyes were blank with my mind already branched. My eyes continued to search and run here and there, until it finally stopped right in the last 5 verses of the letter.



My lips were tightly clenched, but the turmoil in my chest was in a great revolt. Imagining it happening to me really made my fear multiply many times. When my hand was accidentally splashed with hot water it was already very painful, what else was this watered by boiling water. Not just my hand, but my whole other limb. Burned in hell? I really can't imagine how hot it is, seeing the burning stove fire sometimes scares me.

Astagfirullah, Astagfirullah, I continue to say Istigfar in my heart. Trying to calm my heart and mind that are already too frightened by fear. There have been too many sins that I have done so far that without realizing the sins that will lead me to the heat of hellfire. 

"You're okay, right?" I faintly heard Arda's voice, but I had no interest in answering it at all. My brain prefers to dive into fear and regret. My sins are too much and cannot be forgiven.

The sound of me staring at dawn broke my daydream, and without a word I rushed straight to the bathroom to get back to fetching water. Upon arrival there I did not immediately do the activities of holiness, and instead coolly staring at the reflection of myself in a medium-sized mirror that was deliberately installed there.

Washing my face with water and re-stirring my reflection. A perfect face without gaps with radiant white skin, both bright jet black eyes, long lashes that many women crave, thick eyebrows, a runny nose, a long lashes, and the thin pink lips further add to the level of beauty that I have.

Everyone adores my image, even because of this beauty I can attract many men to make as a money-making tool. All this time I have never been grateful and even use his blessings for the pleasure of the world alone. Boasting the look and curves that made all eyes look in awe at me.  All kinds of compliments I get, and it makes my heart happy not to be upset. Until that prideful taste began to grow and entrenched flesh in memory.

"Dar! Aadara!" the sound of screaming coupled with the impatient pounding managed to pull me back to the real world.

"Open the door, Dar! You don't worry me, Adara. Open the door," he said in a high voice mixed with worry.

I do not reply and prefer to accelerate the activities of taking ablution. I opened the door slowly and suffocated in shock when I found Arda standing right in front of the door, only about 10 cm away from me. The look on her face really explained that she was worried about me being in the bathroom for too long.

"I'm not papa," I said, which made him immediately breathe a sigh of relief.

"You wait a minute, I want to take ablution first," he said as I retorted with a nod. He's a little bit away and he's given me access to get out.

My eyes and heart were blinded by the beauty of the mortal world, until it involuntarily made me lose my gratitude, always feeling lacking and assuming God's destiny is not in accordance with expectations are two things that I always complain about. God has so well betrothed me to a man like Arda, but I arrogantly deny the favor. Where have I been all this time?

To dump a man like him just to find the pleasure of the world. Treasure is the first benchmark that I make the main criteria, until I forget that the faith of a servant is not counted by the amount of property and wealth possessed. With money I can buy everything, but I have to admit that one's faith can never match it. He had already run fast to reach his Jannah, but I was still crawling slowly far behind him. Should I be his companion? And is heaven still willing to take a servant like me?

~TBC~