Learning to Be a Mother

39. Give Freedom.

"Enough, Calistas."

I jerked, cutting off the conversation of both sides whose emotions were rising. My son's hands clenched firmly, while his father's breathing was irregular again, like something he had been holding back from earlier and could only be released with the game of his hands.

Tonight there should be no similar quarrel, no one should see the violence of Cahyo to me even though it has been declared as an act of the KDRT. I don't know too much about it or my abusive husband, but no wife wants to hurt her man. Right, huh?

Especially in front of them. Failing to be a good wife and mother to her children, I was humiliated in public because of an accidental neglect, because of the tiredness that I could not erase little by little. Always hugging, I always hold it.

"Your mother never taught you so, Mama also apologized because you and Brother were once courted by Mama and Dad, but Mama please, don't ever take the sick Dad with you. Mama doesn't like it."

"But I'm not wrong, Ma?"

"Mama hope you understand what Mama said."

My son snorted, but did not leave the place as usual. He sat in contact, waiting for the continuation of the conversation that had been interrupted earlier. I have feelings too, and so does Cahyo. Want as hard as his mindset, my husband must have been hurt.

"Lo said I don't care?" However, instead of staying away from the quarrel with the pause I took earlier. My husband continued, "continue all this time I work nothing is that? Let me ask you, who is going to eat your shampoo now?"

"That need isn't just in the dining section, is it?"

Neither I nor Fathan, we glanced at each other. As if what the girl said understood us, finally the exchange of eyes was released again into a head that lowered.

"I also want to be supported like Brother," he said with emphasis, sounding intonation that rose and fell as the tears seemed to break, "why is what I do always wrong in Dad's eyes? Turn Brother fight yesterday until dapet warning letter second aja didiemin, Dad is not angry, Dad is always looking for alesan so that Brother is not scolded Mama."

"Because he's a pinter, he's got potential!" my husband's reply was no less high on his tone, "indeed lo. What can you do for this family? Champions are not good."

"Dad never supported me!"

"Where do I support that you are aja malesan?" Cahyo clucked, "this, yeah. If there is no free mah process, now what less try? He said tired, rest. I also miss every weekday, lo ...? Just told the school a lot of complaining, grateful! There's a lot of people who can't go to school out there."

From here, I can see my daughter rubbing her wet eyelids. This is not the limit, but I know he is tired of arguing with his father about things that are repeatedly discussed and never endless. I can't break up right now, who knows it's time they were honest with each other.

"Father never gives good hope."

"What did I say?"

"That demands expectations!" My son's eyebrows were met, his face was much more emotional than before, "if you think that was included hope, I am not motivated and even more inferior if you want it constantly! I'm the same Brother is different, we have our own advantages. I'm sure that I'm also a pinter outside of academics!"

"Where's the evidence?"

I approached, intending to make his feelings calm because again required to harbor emotions. Although he can express a lot, but there must be something stuck in his heart by talking in front of us.

Calistas are difficult to control emotions, I admit, maybe he is also aware of his unstable self. So I rubbed his hair for a moment, trying to make it better even though there's not much I can do right now.

"Please go to the room, yeah. Same brother, Kalista went into the same room Fathan. Let Mama talk to me."

However, my son shook his head slowly. He seemed reluctant to leave, my wrist was grasped by him.

"No, I don't want you to get beat up by me anymore."

"Eh .. No, dear. Mama won't get beat up by me." I immediately focused my attention on him, rubbing my son's face as gently as possible so that he would obey, "you believe in Mama. Mama's just gonna talk to me, don't be so sad, ah. Kalista is big. Wanna take Mama for a second, right?"

I treated him like a child, trying to make him understand in a persuasive way like that. Luckily he nodded, then ended up with his brother coming into the room without exchanging a glance with his father for the last one tonight.

However, before our discussion ... Cahyo first occupied the sofa again. His mouth was full of sighs, he had not been able to vent his emotions anywhere other than sipping a cup of coffee that had been cold. I didn't talk right away, I let it sit for a while to make sure the feeling was calmer now.

About five minutes later, the cool atmosphere washed back shaking again. There were rain children accompanying our situation, the sound of the fall became a major sign that meant we should have argued again.

"What are you talking about?" Before long, Cahyo opened the topic before me, "if you discuss about other parties or third parties, I don't want to."

"Your son is more important than all of that."

The man chuckled, revealing an forced smile. "It should be important to yourself before you take children."

"I'm serious, Dad." I looked at him deeply, "this is about Kalista. You used to be too loud to talk about it, your prestige never went down for the children with me. You always want to be seen winning, want to be seen really continue. Did you realize that you just cornerkin Kalista? He was called instead of getting more excited or dapet hope even more sad."

"Wrong again."

"I'm not kidding!" My tone increased, I was annoyed to see him avoid the conversation a lot, "I don't like to see you avoid like that. Our problems get bigger, we often misunderstand, Cahyo. I don't want things to get complicated, I just want your children to be understood, to be given freedom, that's all."

"That's all, but if he is given continuously later his son does not want to obey. Think on! Later they will be so willing, who mengeselakan who? Yeah, we-we're gonna!"

"I don't want to debate much anymore."

My body slipped out of the seat, rising up with fully clenched hands without throwing my gaze at another object. I can still control my emotions, but I can't hit him either to make sure my condition is safe until the days ahead.

"Calista opportunity without having to be cornered like that, I don't want you to collect the results, Kalista also must be diem-diem trying. Don't ever flirt again, I don't like it, it's violent and you can report it. Don't tell me I don't dare, yeah. I can treat you like what you did to me."