Learning to Be a Mother

29. Silent Child.

Not wanting to waste a lot of time, we finally set off on a public transportation that passed in front of a T-junction alley house. There are a lot of drivers who live in these settlements and I happen to know some of them.

We boarded the first public transport sighted, driven by my neighbors from another alley, and the condition of the vehicle was still good. Not much skin of the car peeling, not much rusty, also the seat was comfortable without holes unlike other transportation.

"Where are you going?"

I smiled knot. "This will help the youngest child of the school, I also have business there, so all together."

The fathers must agree, then start this transportation so that it goes back as usual. Actually, the distance between my son's home and school is not too far away, but we also don't want to bother going there early in the morning.

I think it's too early to see Irma, so I might be bothering her, right? I shouldn't have left so early, now I look like a mother who needs anyone's listener.

Huft, it's sad. Although my words have a point, I should not show my sorrow to others. Now my face is getting moody, clearly showing something is happening and needs to be contemplated by myself or get solutions from others.

My chest was tight, my feelings were not calm considering that my husband also left early. Maybe he'll come home late, so I can be treated as rude as I wasn't, like yesterday. He can say a lot of things, vilify me or curse a lot of animal names on me. Not in front of the kids.

"Ma, it's coming!"

My eyes blinked quickly, it seemed that from earlier my son was trying to resuscitate me because our goal was to get to the place. Finally, we went down. Despite its neighboring status in the same housing, where might I go passed by without giving a tip. Kalista and I were his first passengers, so I gave him a little note.

"Thank you, sir."

After that, the public transportation drove with the hope of many who ride it today. Believed to have gone away from us, finally my son and I returned our attention to this place, State High School 1 which was the arrival of school residents as usual.

The gate is high and looks strong to hold school children who will run away, the yard is not too wide because the parking lot is not there, either, but the inside of this school has a part that can be said to be spacious because it is wide so deep.

We entered simultaneously, walking in the rhythm of the footprints slowly with not much talking. Both me and Kalista, we both realized that we had revealed some of the attention of the children who had been hanging out along the hallway. They were watching our arrival.

I saw Kalista's reaction, he seemed conscious and unconcerned about what he was seeing now. As if the rumors were beginning to sound just a form of morning entertainment, I said nothing and stopped when my son reached his class destination.

"Udah, a real school."

"I'm a mah" he said, proud of himself. "Of course it's the big brother."

"Not to be discussed, Mama does not like," said I do not want to repeat the topic in this place. "Mom to the next room finished it home. You'll go home by yourself, yeah."

Kalista cleared her throat, continued her journey into the classroom with a wave of hands until she met. I could only shake my head, then continue the journey that had been hampered in the middle of the hallway. I just realized, the audience who saw our trip earlier seemed to know that I was the mother of Fathan who acted yesterday. That's why they're whispering now.

However, my purpose here is not to grumble one by one the students here. Arriving in the teacher's room, I casually knocked on the door three times and pushed the door as an attempt to ascertain the situation inside.

"Eh, Miss Baras. Wanna come to me, huh? Just come in, Mom."

I give thanks in my heart, lucky that Ms. Irma has arrived early in the morning. After smiling sincerely, I followed the direction of the teacher and shook hands with him as a familiar form between the school and the guardians who were ready to open. I'm not sure I'll tell you anything, but I'm sure my listeners can ask what needs to be discussed.

"I'm sorry about Fathan, ma'am. I was out of school, again taking care of the child who graduated last year for the continuation of his college at university."

Hearing my purpose here, no more smiles implied on Ms. Irma's face. As if it was time for you to have a serious conversation, I did not speak until the woman in front of me replied to me earlier.

"Mr Irma, I've never seen Fathan in trouble at this school. Even yesterday it was the first time he was in one of the commotion, how did Fathan feel when it was ugly from his house?"

I thought for a moment, remembering what happened between us before the day of the exam. However, all I remember is permission to ask for futsal, as well as a small debate between me and Cahyo at that time. There's nothing else.

"At that time my son asked permission to play with his friends, but I did not permit him because of tomorrow's test. My son has to learn."

Ms. Irma just nodded. "Does Bu Laras have trouble dealing with Mom's children?"

If asked this is definitely my answer 'yes'. Besides being difficult to understand, they were also unruly, and many rebelled. If it has reached the limit of emotions, I will be blamed like Kalista to me at that time. Yeah, right?

"Which difficult child to understand, ma'am?" mama Irma looked at me seriously. "But if Bu Laras does not want to answer or this is already the limit of his privacy, I do not mean Mother."

I spontaneously shook my head, it seems like I should have consulted this one counseling teacher. He had known me for a long time, we also had frequent discussions, and had occasional meetings. There's no difficulty when I talk to her, so I can tell her a little bit, right?

"Calistas, Miss Irma."

"A lot of cysts?"

I immediately refuted, "Kalista never diem if at home, at least only just cramming. He's got a lot of emotions, I'm hard on Kalista."

"No, Ma. What we need to haveepin is the most ancient."

I was confused to hear that. "Didn't Miss Irma ask me about who is difficult to care for? If the answer is, Fathan is a lot diemnya because nurut continues to be the same me. There is no problem anyway, every time it must immediately ngoknuk."

Ms. Irma did her turn with a headband, making a lot of questions that clumped in my mind over her actions earlier. I seemed to have answered wrongly, but what I said was true. Fathan is a lot of quiet, but he's easy to manage. Why take care of that kid first?

"Bu Laras, the child in them does not necessarily have a problem. Of the many parents who consult with me, many pendiem children who have more difficulty controlling their emotions. Diem-diem they silent treatment, hold anger constantly, not good."

My eyebrows shriveled, still not understanding. "What do you mean, ma'am?"

"The pendiem child usually loses the attention of his parents, he can only nod his head if he is speaking. It doesn't take much attention, it seems they can't be angry, but they're resigned and sometimes need attention."

I was pensive to hear it, did Fathan feel that? Did she really lose getting a portion of attention than her sister? If you remember, my son that one did not complain much in front of me, not much protest.

"Are all the pendiem's children that way?"

Ms. Irma replied, "No, Mom. But the average pendiem must have been so, especially if they are the first child, nothing should be given. Not to be whiny, have a lot of expectations parents to be exemplified to his sister, must be brave, always considered big or adult when age does not determine the maturity of the child."

I sighed, was I once again outrageous?