Is It Wrong Not All Right?

Is It Wrong to Not Be Alone?

Fina again consulted with Doctor Gerald. His face was not as happy as usual. Gerald could guess there was something bad he was having.

“It's wrong huh, Doc, to not be okay?” one question came out of Fina's mouth. Look at the girl sad. He still clearly remembered Mama Win's words that night.

“Of course not Fina. We're just human. It's normal not to be okay.”

“But why do people around me see me as if something is wrong with me. As if there were a lot of problems with me.”

“Now the Doctor asked. Is that person's talk important to you Fina?”

Fina shook her head.

“Then just ignore it. People don't define who you are. They don't even know you very well. They may only see you once or twice a week. So you can't claim their speech is a reality.”

Fina's stunned. He had never even spoken directly to Mama Win.

“Still Doc.” Fina started to pull her smile.

The room was silent for a moment.

“Dok...,” call Fina.

“Yes? Anything else?” ask Gerald.

“Enough, Doc. I just wanna say... Thanks for everything.” Fina saw how great Gerald was to her.

“Your welcome, Fina.. Doctors are also happy to have patients like you.” Gerald smiled faintly. “You can definitely get through this all Fina. Good things will soon wait.”

“Still, Doc. All thanks to the doctor too. Can I have one request Doc?” fina Pinta.

“Sure..” Gerald was kind.

“Why not?” Gerald stood up from his chair. Fina followed. Fina approached the doctor and hugged him. Fina already considers doctors like part of her family.

“Its, OK, China. You're a strong person.” Gerald smirked in Fina's ear.

“You make me OK, Doc.” Fina retaliated.

The hug is over. Fina says goodbye to Gerald to leave immediately. Gerald waved his hand adorablely as if back at Fina's age. Fina smiled. He feels very lucky to have met a doctor like Gerald.

...***

...

Fina didn't go straight home. He stopped for a moment at his mother's. He misses his mother. And there were many things he wanted to tell her.

Fina crouched down beside her mother's navel. Focusing his gaze on the tombstone engraved by his mother's name.

“Bu... Mommy want to know? Now I can make pineapple fried rice. My friends say, well, good. But don't know if according to mom.” Fina said softly. His eyes are covered with water.

“I also met good people, Mom. There's Win, there's Doctor Gerald, there's Kalin, there's Fuji and Letta, there's a lot of deh.” Fina smiled at the faces of her friends she mentioned.

“Mother don't worry. God willing Fina will stop living like this, Mom. Fina will no longer need drugs. Fina won't cry anymore every night. Fina will no longer have pain in her neck. Fina will no longer have trouble breathing.” Fina convinced her mother. A drop of tears flowed down his cheek, considering how devastated he used to be. “Calm mom is there. Fina has let Mom go.”

Fina wiped her cheeks. He left that place. He looked back for a moment, looking at his mother's navel before actually leaving the cemetery. Her lips curled a smile of constancy. Her mother must be proud of her struggle to survive all this time.

...***

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