I'm Not Taking It Again

Don't Read It Too

The meeting of Dirga and Nindy was fruitless. Dirga did not want to force Nindy because her mother did not want Nindy to see her because of coercion. Eventually, Dirga chose to give up. He could not bear to see Nindy bathed in tears.

Nindy's decision is unanimous, she hasn't been willing to meet her mother. Not without reason, he's not ready. Let him feel the longing for his mother alone. He did not want to see the two men he loved so much grieving and pretending to be happy just to see him happy. He is not a happy person above the suffering of others. Dirga explained everything. Nindy remained adamant about her decision. Nindy was only afraid that her two favorite men would feel hurt again. The mouth can speak yes, but in his heart who knows.

"Ndy doesn't want Big Brother and Papah to pretend to be happy just to see Ndy happy. Ndy doesn't need that, all Ndy needs is you two. Angel protector Ndy. Even if it's only with you, Ndy's still happy" he said.

Dirga could not say anything. Nindy is not a child anymore and she has the right to make a choice. All Nindy's decisions she has to respect. Whether it is in line with him or against him must still respect him. Sometimes what we want is not what we want.

Before coming out of the study, Dirga wiped the tears that soaked her sister's face. He kissed softly Nindy's forehead.

"Don't cry anymore" said Dirga. "So, I'm sad when you're like this."

Nindy hugged her brother's body again. He sobbed back and his tears drenched his brother's shirt.

"Just Brother and Papah are next to Ndy, Ndy is happy" he said.

Dirga hugged his sister's body tightly. He also has no power to hold haru. For now let it be like this first. Tearing Nindy down calmed her heart it was more remaining. Later Dirga will try to talk again with Nindy after her mood changes.

The two of them came out of the study and met Kenan and Niar. Nindy immediately hugged Kenan's body, with her eyes moist, while Dirga kissed the tip of Niar's head. Niar looked at the red husband's eyes as if he was crying. She clasped Dirga's hand tightly and gave her sweetest smile. A little bit of sadness Dirga just overflowed.

Kenan who saw the look on Nindy's face that had changed so drastically could only return his wife's embrace tightly. He invites Nindy to come home so that Nindy can calm down. Previously, he said goodbye first to Dirga as well as Niar.

"Jaga Nindy" whispered Dirga. Kenan nodded in understanding. Something happened between his wife and brother-in-law.

Along the way, Nindy was silent. I want him to ask his wife something. But he knows the limits. He did not want to interfere in his wife's matters. He was afraid of being wrong because Nindy could not tell him the truth.

"Want to buy something?" bargain Kenan. Nindy shook her head without looking at Kenan. The car continues to drive towards the house of Deri.

At the Dirga residence, Niar had gently rubbed her husband's shoulder to calm the heart of the man who had become the father of his child. He saw something was going on. The gentle swipe also gave the code so that her husband had to tell her the truth.

"Nindy refused" said Dirga.

Already Niar guessed, from the look of Nindy's face it was clear that his sister-in-law did not please him, like something was still stuck in Nindy's heart.

"Patience yes. Don't force Nindy, she just recovered," Niar added "Don't make her think of Papih's request. Fear of the condition drop again," continued Niar.

Dirga could only nod obeying the words of his wife. "Slow down if you talk to Nindy. There was an invisible wound that he felt. Mama felt that way."

It wasn't just Niar who felt that way. Dirga also felt that his sister Nindy had changed since her mother went to prison. There's a lot he covers. There is much he cannot open to others, including himself.

"I'm sorry Brother, Ndy." Dirga feels guilty for separating Nindy and her biological mother.

At home, Kenan told his wife to sleep first. "You rest, yeah. Mom, go to the workroom first. There's a lot of work for tomorrow" he said. Before leaving Kenan kissed Nindy's forehead first.

Nindy said Kenan. He wanted to cry, but he didn't want anyone to know. He is the only one who knows his sorrow and his pain. Only he can know its fragility.

After Kenan's departure to his study. Tears that he had been holding back from earlier, finally spilled. Nindy was crying like she had a deep, heavy cut. He spilled out everything that was on his chest alone. She didn't want anyone to know including her husband.

"Miss you so much, Mah," he said.

Nindy grew sobbing and she began to immerse her face on her knees. He sobbed very softly. There was a longing that he did not convey. There was pain that he had endured for months.

"Ndy, not ready to meet Mamah. Ndy, I'm not ready to talk to you about Ndy's true feelings. Forgive Ndy, Mah, "he muttered.

In the study, Kenan immediately contacted Dirga. He talked about his wife and what plans they would do after this failure. He couldn't bear to see Nindy like this all the time.

"You take Nindy on vacation first. Don't talk about anything mama." Kenan said to Dirga. He knew very well what Dirga was doing was best for his wife. Dirga's words sounded very sorry.

The next morning, Dirga who had just come directly to Kenan who was behind the laptop screen. Dirga's face looks frustrated and sad.

"I'm sorry cave, Nan," said Dirga.

Kenan's forehead shriveled, he could not yet digest the words of Dirga who suddenly apologized. Before long his brain was able to catch what his boss meant. Finally, Kenan understood what Dirga was talking about.

"No need to apologize, sir. We just need to give Nindy some space. Don't force him. There may be a reason behind this all that Nindy doesn't tell us" Kenan replied.

"Till this morning Nindy didn't say anything to me. Nor talk about your conversation with him," said Kenan.

Dirga did not think about this sister. It was so strong that his heart held everything by itself. Even to her husband she was not open.

"Night, Nindy cried for quite a while. But I just let it go. Only in that way can Nindy calm down" continued Kenan.

Dirga leaned his body on the seat of his greatness. I heard a rough breath. She was thinking of ways to persuade her sister because she did not want to see her sister tormented like this.

"When Nindy can't stem her longing, she will come to you and ask to see Mamah" continued Kenan.

Deri had heard that Nindy refused to meet her mother. Deri just smiled thinly. He already knew it was going to happen. Nindy is a child who has an incredible hardness of heart. However, Deri could not force. She also did not want to talk to Nindy about her mother. Let his son who realizes his own sense of longing for the figure of the mama. Deri just allowed enough.

This time, Dirga deliberately came to the office of the father. Asking his father to speak directly to Nindy. Deri just smiled, then she got up from her seat and sat down beside Dirga.

"Bah, do me a favor" Dirga said.

"Father can't do anything. All decisions are in Nindy's hands. He is not a child anymore to be forced. He has the freedom to make choices. Appreciate the decision" said Deri.

Dirga was speechless hearing the reply from the very straightforward Deri. There was nothing wrong with his answer. Right now it is his papa who is the last hope to persuade Nindy. Who knows, Nindy wants to hear what her father said.

"Well, I'm sure Nindy misses Mamah a lot. Mom must have missed Nindy a lot too. I just want to see my sister and mother happy" said Dirga. He still continues to force his father to persuade Nindy. He hoped this way would work.

"Is being forced to make people happy?" ask Deri.

Now Dirga's mouth is silenced. He could not refute the words of his father. Deri's face looked relaxed, but his sentence was deep.

"Listen yes, Ga. We don't have to force others to be happy if they're basically happy in their way. Leave it alone" explained Deri.

"Just like your sister Dnegan. When he realized where the emptiness of his heart was, he would definitely go to a place where his heart could come back full of love as well as love. The child has no trace, as does the mother. They're continuous. They have a strong bond. They are separated, only because the ego is not yet able to unite," explained Deri with a smile that continues to expand.

Seeing the face of his father who looks happy, Dirga also mebalan. He hoped his father would help him. But everything is different. His father let Nindy dissolve with his heart. There was no persuasion or appeal to Nindy.

There was a bit of disappointment in his heart. However, he could not force his father either. He was so grateful that his father had allowed him to see his mother. Deri was not angry when Dirga said the truth about him and Septi.

The father's words were all right. He should be able to appreciate his sister's decision. He should be able to understand Nindy's condition now. She also believes that Nindy loves her mother very much. The same is the case with the mother who certainly never broke up to pray for her child. Even though his son hates him. Hopefully, Nindy remembers the sentence heaven is under the soles of the mother's feet so that Nindy wants to meet her mother and eliminate her hatred.

After getting nothing, Dirga chose to leave the papah's office. She had to be a little more patient to make Nindy want to see her mother. There's something that Nindy can't express. It might also be too painful for him.

Feeling bored at home, this afternoon Nindy decided to go to the house of her sister because she wanted to play with Arshen, the niece who is funny and echoing. Niar was at home ready and nghendong Arshen who was handsome to meet his sister-in-law at the house of the father-in-law. Niar was a little worried about Nindy's state. Afraid of bad things happening to her sister.

The door of Niar's house opened, as Njar went down the stairs he was jolted with Nindy's presence.

"Where are you going?" asked Nindy, her sister-in-law had been wearing a bagusan dress and Arshen was already very handsome.

"To your house" answered Niar.

"Huh?" Nindy laughs, she immediately takes over her niece and takes her to the living room. Niar followed him from behind.

"Don't worry about Ndy. Ndy, all right," he added.

Niar looked at Nindy with question marks. Why can his sister hide everything. But everyone already knows how he is.

"Ndy, why aren't you being honest with how you feel?" sergeant Niar.

Nindy who was inviting Arshen to play is now staring at the sister-in-law.

"Not everything Ndy feels can be Ndy's phrase Kak. There was a time when Ndy needed time to be alone. There are times when Ndy just wants to cry without telling a story" she explained.

Niar who heard it felt touched by his heart. There was something Nindy had kept secret and it was hard to reveal to anyone.

"Ndy, it's been happy like this" he added.

Nindy's lips were able to smile, but Niar felt the pain that befell Nindy. Niar immediately hugged Nindy's body so tightly.

"Don't carry your burden alone. Share with those who love you so that your burdens may disappear." The words that made Nindy nod.

Nindy looked down at the brother-in-law. She felt very loved by this sister-in-law. The woman who became a surrogate mother for him.

"Thank you" Nindy said in a trembling voice.

Niar smiled and gently rubbed the shoulder of the sister-in-law. "If you talk to your brother. Talk to Brother Niar."

Nindy smiled as she nodded. Nindy hugged her sister-in-law's body very tightly. Sister-in-law taste sister. That's what Nindy felt.

"It's not good if we're all alone. Sometimes we have to share your sadness. It is not just happiness that can be shared. Sadness must be shared so that little by little it goes away." Nindy could only nod.

It was fortunate that she had a sister-in-law like Niar. Although in-law, but Niar does not show that. He was closer to his brother-in-law than to his brother.

"Sister doesn't want to see you sad. Same is the case with your husband who certainly does not want to see you slumped about this problem.

"Learn slowly. God willing you will be able to let go of everything